jail or prison- comparison?
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Join Date: Oct 2011
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jail or prison- comparison?
Hello SR family, JJ is facing a burglary charge for the home invasion in May. They are pursuing a "strike" felony which in California is a prison sentence, not jail. I wondered if any of you have experience in comparing living conditions? Online, there are varying opinions. I know either one is horrible, but here in SD, the jail system is not bad. They provide a lot of options with counseling, health and mental services and opportunities for working. If he is convicted of the felony "strike", he will have to go to prison. The sentence could be 2 years with about 11 months served. We have discussed the option of the srike being waived after he gets out , repays his debt to us and does some community service. I am not giving JJ any advice because in my heart I believe that this is what is supposed to happen. As everyone who has followed our saga, he by all rights should be dead by now. By the Grace of God, he is not. In fact, he was picked up three days after the warrant was issued and there are no other legal cases or charges against him except this one. So God is at work here for sure. I am reaching out to find out how others who have had a loved on in either jail and or prison can share their experiences. When JJ was in jail last year, he was there for 4 months and came out looking healthy and only one small tattoo 
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
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My ex liked prison way more than jail. So much he went back twice. More priveleges. More work opportunities so he could earn money to put on his own books. More educational opportunities. Better visitation schedule. Better food. More time outdoors. No orange jumpsuit. He was minimum security. Non-violent crime. I wouldn't worry about it. Six of one half a dozen of the other. He can make good or bad choices no matter where he's at.
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: CA
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I'm in CA. My son had a residential burglary when he was 18.
It was a serious felony. The sentence would have been 2 to 4 years.
He received 3 years probation and community service. He could have had the felony reduced if he had a clean probation, but he messed that up with something. I can't remember what it was.
Your son may not serve time if this is his first offense.
It was a serious felony. The sentence would have been 2 to 4 years.
He received 3 years probation and community service. He could have had the felony reduced if he had a clean probation, but he messed that up with something. I can't remember what it was.
Your son may not serve time if this is his first offense.
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Hi Morning Glory, this is not his first offense. He was arrested last year for stealing from us and he was sentenced to 3 years probation. He served 4 months in county jail then was allowed to finish his time in rehab, which he did. I don't think they will give him probation again.
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Thank you CO! I do hope he can take advantage of all the services that are available to him. But again, this is his life and he needs to finally grow up and be a man. Take responsibility for his actions and not look back.
Today's Muse
Join Date: May 2007
Location: West end
Posts: 1,081
I think a lot depends on the state. Also, whether or not the prison is a state or a privately operated facility. California has what they call a Supermax Prison system. Generally, they have a bad reputation. Not all facilities are Supermax though. I think it is hard to say which is better because there are so many variables involved. His experience will be his experience. Hopefully, he will learn from the experience and move forward.
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 16
I don't know anything about jail or prison in America but just wanted to say that going to prison here in a way was a good thing for me, looking back at it now, although I didn't think it at the time so maybe it could be the same for him.
I had been getting into trouble with my drinking and ended up going to prison here in England when I was 22 for an assault that came from me drinking. It was tough in there but it gave me time to think about what I wanted in life and that I didn't want to be going in and out of prison and wasting my life. I got to do some courses and training. My Dad passed away when I was in prison and having to go to his funeral as a prisoner is something that made me really ashamed.
Nearly 5 years later at 27 I've just finished Army Basic Training and looking forward to a new career. I always wanted to join the Army as alot of my family have served but had to wait a long time to convince them that I had changed. At my Passing Out Parade I was thinking that 5 years ago I was wearing a prison uniform but know I was wearing a much better uniform.
Over here there is no difference between jail and prison. Every prison has all different people in for different things - I had a cellmate in for driving offences and the next one I had was in for armed robbery.
I only know what I've seen on TV and in the movies about prison in the States but it seems worse than over here. We only get to see teh ones about the worse prisons and gangs so I assume it probably isn't all like that but you do get chances over here to do courses and learn trades to help you when you get out. Hopefully whatever happens he'll get a chance at doing things to make it easier for him when he gets out.
I never realised at the time but having family outside who still care for you when you are locked up is such a big deal. I know that you are really doing the sentence too eventhough you are not locked up.
I had been getting into trouble with my drinking and ended up going to prison here in England when I was 22 for an assault that came from me drinking. It was tough in there but it gave me time to think about what I wanted in life and that I didn't want to be going in and out of prison and wasting my life. I got to do some courses and training. My Dad passed away when I was in prison and having to go to his funeral as a prisoner is something that made me really ashamed.
Nearly 5 years later at 27 I've just finished Army Basic Training and looking forward to a new career. I always wanted to join the Army as alot of my family have served but had to wait a long time to convince them that I had changed. At my Passing Out Parade I was thinking that 5 years ago I was wearing a prison uniform but know I was wearing a much better uniform.
Over here there is no difference between jail and prison. Every prison has all different people in for different things - I had a cellmate in for driving offences and the next one I had was in for armed robbery.
I only know what I've seen on TV and in the movies about prison in the States but it seems worse than over here. We only get to see teh ones about the worse prisons and gangs so I assume it probably isn't all like that but you do get chances over here to do courses and learn trades to help you when you get out. Hopefully whatever happens he'll get a chance at doing things to make it easier for him when he gets out.
I never realised at the time but having family outside who still care for you when you are locked up is such a big deal. I know that you are really doing the sentence too eventhough you are not locked up.
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
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In my drinking days I've been to jail, but not to prison. It was kinda the consensus that prison is better.
I say this about twice a year in the F&F forum, and it isn't always accepted very well, but here goes: Just because your loved one is locked does not mean they are clean. Anything is available inside. Anything. The jail guards themselves are the dealers. I am sure there are jails and prisons where this is not the case but in my experience and in talking to others in AA who were locked up, jail is a great place to get high.
If he doesn't have money, that may not stop him. There are lots of things inside that serve as defacto currency - manual labor, smokes, phone cards, extra snacks, sexual favors, etc. These let you "buy" what you want.
I'm sorry this isn't very pretty, but jail/prison is not a pretty place.
I say this about twice a year in the F&F forum, and it isn't always accepted very well, but here goes: Just because your loved one is locked does not mean they are clean. Anything is available inside. Anything. The jail guards themselves are the dealers. I am sure there are jails and prisons where this is not the case but in my experience and in talking to others in AA who were locked up, jail is a great place to get high.
If he doesn't have money, that may not stop him. There are lots of things inside that serve as defacto currency - manual labor, smokes, phone cards, extra snacks, sexual favors, etc. These let you "buy" what you want.
I'm sorry this isn't very pretty, but jail/prison is not a pretty place.
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
I never made it to prison (came CLOSE) but did a lot of time in county jails and a diversion center. A good friend of mine did prison time. When she was doing time, I was "free" and working. I kept hearing about how she needed this, that, they didn't have a/c or heat, etc. She kept telling me "you don't know how HARD it is in here!" and I kept telling her "you don't know how HARD it is out here...dealing with the consequences"
She got out, I paid for her week in a motel, she got a job and then told me "I get it..you were right..it's way harder out here". She was fed, she had a bed to sleep in. Yes, she had to march and do duties but she found out that living life on the "outside" was way harder.
I know a lot of prisons in GA don't have heat or a/c. Same with prisons in NY (my stepsister was there). However, every single person I've known in prison has struggled more on the outside than inside. Yes, there are programs, yes there are "jobs" that pay a minimal amount.
I like to think of "sarge" who worked at my diversion center. He told us "we don't WANT you to like it here, we don't WANT you to be comfortable. We WANT you to hate it so much that you get your shytt together and never come back!!!!". Worked for me
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
She got out, I paid for her week in a motel, she got a job and then told me "I get it..you were right..it's way harder out here". She was fed, she had a bed to sleep in. Yes, she had to march and do duties but she found out that living life on the "outside" was way harder.
I know a lot of prisons in GA don't have heat or a/c. Same with prisons in NY (my stepsister was there). However, every single person I've known in prison has struggled more on the outside than inside. Yes, there are programs, yes there are "jobs" that pay a minimal amount.
I like to think of "sarge" who worked at my diversion center. He told us "we don't WANT you to like it here, we don't WANT you to be comfortable. We WANT you to hate it so much that you get your shytt together and never come back!!!!". Worked for me
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Today's Muse
Join Date: May 2007
Location: West end
Posts: 1,081
It has been brought to my attention by PM that there are no prisons in CA classified as Supermax. I don't know if this will be a factor with your sons situation or not. Just thought I would "correct" myself if I gave inaccurate information.
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by Taking5 
In my drinking days I've been to jail, but not to prison. It was kinda the consensus that prison is better.
I say this about twice a year in the F&F forum, and it isn't always accepted very well, but here goes: Just because your loved one is locked does not mean they are clean. Anything is available inside. Anything. The jail guards themselves are the dealers. I am sure there are jails and prisons where this is not the case but in my experience and in talking to others in AA who were locked up, jail is a great place to get high.
If he doesn't have money, that may not stop him. There are lots of things inside that serve as defacto currency - manual labor, smokes, phone cards, extra snacks, sexual favors, etc. These let you "buy" what you want.
I'm sorry this isn't very pretty, but jail/prison is not a pretty place.
I say this about twice a year in the F&F forum, and it isn't always accepted very well, but here goes: Just because your loved one is locked does not mean they are clean. Anything is available inside. Anything. The jail guards themselves are the dealers. I am sure there are jails and prisons where this is not the case but in my experience and in talking to others in AA who were locked up, jail is a great place to get high.
If he doesn't have money, that may not stop him. There are lots of things inside that serve as defacto currency - manual labor, smokes, phone cards, extra snacks, sexual favors, etc. These let you "buy" what you want.
I'm sorry this isn't very pretty, but jail/prison is not a pretty place.
I heard that smoking is banned in most jails and prisons in America. Is that true? Couldn't imagine not being able to smoke when locked up. We have a smoking ban here now but prison cells (just the prison cells - it covers common area) are exempt
Also the uniforms over there seem extreme. We had uniform but they were normal clothes - seen pictures of people in pink and black and white stripe uniforms. Is that usual?
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Originally Posted by Paul84
Same over here - drugs get in and if you really want them you can get them but I stayed away from all that. Just wanted to get out as soon as I could.
I heard that smoking is banned in most jails and prisons in America. Is that true? Couldn't imagine not being able to smoke when locked up. We have a smoking ban here now but prison cells (just the prison cells - it covers common area) are exempt
Also the uniforms over there seem extreme. We had uniform but they were normal clothes - seen pictures of people in pink and black and white stripe uniforms. Is that usual?
I heard that smoking is banned in most jails and prisons in America. Is that true? Couldn't imagine not being able to smoke when locked up. We have a smoking ban here now but prison cells (just the prison cells - it covers common area) are exempt
Also the uniforms over there seem extreme. We had uniform but they were normal clothes - seen pictures of people in pink and black and white stripe uniforms. Is that usual?
Not sure on the smoking thing, my jail stint was in 1999 and a lot has changed.
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
It seems to be very common for those on the inside to expect friends/family to make contributions towards internal accounts to buy treats and personal products. Some reportedly become very aggressive and manipulative in conning others to help them out.
Prisons give inmates everything they need to survive, food, shelter, clothing, shoes, showers and medical care, when necessary. There is no reason for anyone to put money on a prisoner's account. Inmates have an opportunity to earn money the old fashioned way, by working.
Prison is not summer camp.
Prisons give inmates everything they need to survive, food, shelter, clothing, shoes, showers and medical care, when necessary. There is no reason for anyone to put money on a prisoner's account. Inmates have an opportunity to earn money the old fashioned way, by working.
Prison is not summer camp.
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