Crsytal Meth Use
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Crsytal Meth Use
This is my first post and Im not sure if it should be here or under substance abuse. But I would like to know if anyone knows about crystal meth and can talk with me about it. My boyfriend has been using it, and I have a lot of questions.
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Doesn’t look like anyone is out there tonight but I will tell my problem anyway. My boyfriend has been using meth for I really don’t know how long he says only a couple months. Im 22, and he is 26 and we live together and are planning on getting married when I graduate this year. I knew he had been acting weird for a while. I thought it was because of his work, and that he had taken on a part time job. I thought that made no sense that he took the job but he said it was so we could save up some extra money. Sweet I thought that he was looking out for our future. But then he starts acting weird. He is anxious, and cannot sleep. All wound up but cant accomplish anything. Started becoming rude, and saying things that were just mean. Anytime Id ask him to do something, help out with anything, go somewhere. Didn’t matter. And I would talk and he would act like he was listening and then blip he was gone. Couldn’t focus. Then he said he was drinking energy drinks with caffeine which I didn’t believe cause they don’t do that to you. He also started getting really demanding of what he wanted. I love him, but he started getting very forceful. I cant really explain and I haven’t told anyone this part of it. Its not like I told him no, I just went along with it even though it wasn’t what I wanted usually. And then all that part mostly stopped, but he was working all the time and would come home late. He would either not sleep at all, or there would be the weekend when he would sleep ALL the time. And then Monday and he was all over the place again.
I found out I was pregnant a few weeks ago. We had a talk, and I had prepared myself to leave him because I thought he was cheating on me, and I didn’t think he would want the baby. But this is when he came clean and told me about how he was using meth. But he wanted to stop and he loved me and wanted a family like we had always planned. So he tried, he failed. One day. Then he said he would do it again and use downers. That seemed to work better, and he was so good for over a week. Then last week, I could tell he was all hyped up again even though he denied it. I came home early one day because I was feeling sick and he was with a girl. We had a huge fight. I ended up getting shoved to the ground and fell hard. I was ok but I was scared for the baby. I got out to my car, and called my sister. And went to her house and then to the hospital. The baby was ok. I guess I overreacted. My sister told them what happened and they went through this whole thing about being battered and I could file charges against him, and it was all so awful. He didn’t mean for me to fall. I got out of there but had no where to go. I was really mad at my sister. I went to his parents and told them the whole thing. They had no idea. I have been staying at their house. They have been trying to get him to agree to some kind of treatment. I talked to him once when I went to get some clothes and things. He must have been coming down and using downers because his dad was there. His dads been staying there with him . He was crying and begging me not to leave him. How much he loves me and our baby. Im hurting so bad. I love him, but right now Im disgusted by him.
Ive been reading some on meth and it sounds bad. Like one of the worst. The only positive think I see is that mostly it talks about injecting it or smoking it, and he puts it in juice and drinks it. Does that make it weaker? All this is why I want to talk to people who know about meth and can tell me what kind of chance he has at beating it. If its only been a few months that will make it easier right? If he goes to treatment that will help?
I found out I was pregnant a few weeks ago. We had a talk, and I had prepared myself to leave him because I thought he was cheating on me, and I didn’t think he would want the baby. But this is when he came clean and told me about how he was using meth. But he wanted to stop and he loved me and wanted a family like we had always planned. So he tried, he failed. One day. Then he said he would do it again and use downers. That seemed to work better, and he was so good for over a week. Then last week, I could tell he was all hyped up again even though he denied it. I came home early one day because I was feeling sick and he was with a girl. We had a huge fight. I ended up getting shoved to the ground and fell hard. I was ok but I was scared for the baby. I got out to my car, and called my sister. And went to her house and then to the hospital. The baby was ok. I guess I overreacted. My sister told them what happened and they went through this whole thing about being battered and I could file charges against him, and it was all so awful. He didn’t mean for me to fall. I got out of there but had no where to go. I was really mad at my sister. I went to his parents and told them the whole thing. They had no idea. I have been staying at their house. They have been trying to get him to agree to some kind of treatment. I talked to him once when I went to get some clothes and things. He must have been coming down and using downers because his dad was there. His dads been staying there with him . He was crying and begging me not to leave him. How much he loves me and our baby. Im hurting so bad. I love him, but right now Im disgusted by him.
Ive been reading some on meth and it sounds bad. Like one of the worst. The only positive think I see is that mostly it talks about injecting it or smoking it, and he puts it in juice and drinks it. Does that make it weaker? All this is why I want to talk to people who know about meth and can tell me what kind of chance he has at beating it. If its only been a few months that will make it easier right? If he goes to treatment that will help?
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Hi crystal. I hope you get some responses from people with more experience with addicted partners and with meth and with abusive relationships. (I'm on SR cuz I'm an alcoholic.). But since no ones posted a reply yet I thought I would. Get away from this guy!!! He sounds like seriously bad news and he will destroy your life. The physical abuse will escalate and the drug use will continue and he probably will start smoking and injecting it. The fact that he is combining meth with other drugs is even worse. I urge you to get out of this situation.
I know you love him, but this is a bad situation for you. He needs to seek help and you do not need to be subjected to his craziness and abuse. I had a bf (alcoholic, crack addict) who also pushed me to the ground, and I also told myself he didn't mean for me to fall. The next time he pushed me and "didn't mean" to make me fall, he also kicked me in the back. Thank God I had only been dating him a couple months, and I got out before things got worse.
I hope you get some more replies. Thank you for reaching out.
I know you love him, but this is a bad situation for you. He needs to seek help and you do not need to be subjected to his craziness and abuse. I had a bf (alcoholic, crack addict) who also pushed me to the ground, and I also told myself he didn't mean for me to fall. The next time he pushed me and "didn't mean" to make me fall, he also kicked me in the back. Thank God I had only been dating him a couple months, and I got out before things got worse.
I hope you get some more replies. Thank you for reaching out.
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Thank you Sobersunshine. I know its late. I couldnt find a lot about meth here anyway. But I will read a little more.
Its hard, I mean he has always been sweet and kind and loving. Not mean and angry and anxious. I know its the drugs and I keep thinking if he just can stop . But there is no way of knowing how long that will take. I just feel so sick about it all, like how could he be so stupid to do this to both of us. And I cant ever be free of him, not if I keep this baby. Its impossible.
thanks for replying to me.
Its hard, I mean he has always been sweet and kind and loving. Not mean and angry and anxious. I know its the drugs and I keep thinking if he just can stop . But there is no way of knowing how long that will take. I just feel so sick about it all, like how could he be so stupid to do this to both of us. And I cant ever be free of him, not if I keep this baby. Its impossible.
thanks for replying to me.
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Hi Crystalbuterfly and Welcome to SR. I'm sorry that you're not getting many replies, but others should be along soon to share their experiences with you.
I don't know much, but my grown son's drug of choice is Meth. I've heard it called the devil's drug. It's really bad. I do know that it's very addictive. My son has been using it for over 10 years. It is a type of speed. You can just google it & you will find out alot more than you could ever want to know. It's a very progressive & addictive drug. It is one that is almost impossible to recover from. Please consider your own health, happiness & safety & that of your baby too.
I don't know much, but my grown son's drug of choice is Meth. I've heard it called the devil's drug. It's really bad. I do know that it's very addictive. My son has been using it for over 10 years. It is a type of speed. You can just google it & you will find out alot more than you could ever want to know. It's a very progressive & addictive drug. It is one that is almost impossible to recover from. Please consider your own health, happiness & safety & that of your baby too.
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Yes it's late but there are people on here from all over the world in different time zones so hopefully you'll get some more replies soon. I'm really sorry for what you are going through. I hope I didn't sound too harsh in my first post. I know it's easier said than done and there are so many emotions involved, and a baby! Wow, that's a lot to handle. it's good you're here and I hope you will get some good counsel.
Yes, drugs and alcohol can turn someone into a completely different person. But you can't give up your sanity and the rest of your life to someone who may never change. I say this as an addict (alcohol). I am 12 days sober. This is my third or fourth attempt at quitting in the past five years. I never made it past a month. of course, I am doing things differently now and I am PLANNING to stay sober, but people relapse all the time. I could too. I am not saying no one should stick by someone who is an addict, and I am not saying he won't get help and stay clean the rest of his life and be a wonderful husband and father. And I'm not saying he is not a good person who treated you well in the past. But as the situation stands right now, it sounds like a very bad place for you.
I'm sorry you are going through this and I hope you find some good help here.
Yes, drugs and alcohol can turn someone into a completely different person. But you can't give up your sanity and the rest of your life to someone who may never change. I say this as an addict (alcohol). I am 12 days sober. This is my third or fourth attempt at quitting in the past five years. I never made it past a month. of course, I am doing things differently now and I am PLANNING to stay sober, but people relapse all the time. I could too. I am not saying no one should stick by someone who is an addict, and I am not saying he won't get help and stay clean the rest of his life and be a wonderful husband and father. And I'm not saying he is not a good person who treated you well in the past. But as the situation stands right now, it sounds like a very bad place for you.
I'm sorry you are going through this and I hope you find some good help here.
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Originally Posted by Sobersunshine 
Yes it's late but there are people on here from all over the world in different time zones so hopefully you'll get some more replies soon. I'm really sorry for what you are going through. I hope I didn't sound too harsh in my first post. I know it's easier said than done and there are so many emotions involved, and a baby! Wow, that's a lot to handle. it's good you're here and I hope you will get some good counsel.
Yes, drugs and alcohol can turn someone into a completely different person. But you can't give up your sanity and the rest of your life to someone who may never change. I say this as an addict (alcohol). I am 12 days sober. This is my third or fourth attempt at quitting in the past five years. I never made it past a month. of course, I am doing things differently now and I am PLANNING to stay sober, but people relapse all the time. I could too. I am not saying no one should stick by someone who is an addict, and I am not saying he won't get help and stay clean the rest of his life and be a wonderful husband and father. And I'm not saying he is not a good person who treated you well in the past. But as the situation stands right now, it sounds like a very bad place for you.
I'm sorry you are going through this and I hope you find some good help here.
Yes, drugs and alcohol can turn someone into a completely different person. But you can't give up your sanity and the rest of your life to someone who may never change. I say this as an addict (alcohol). I am 12 days sober. This is my third or fourth attempt at quitting in the past five years. I never made it past a month. of course, I am doing things differently now and I am PLANNING to stay sober, but people relapse all the time. I could too. I am not saying no one should stick by someone who is an addict, and I am not saying he won't get help and stay clean the rest of his life and be a wonderful husband and father. And I'm not saying he is not a good person who treated you well in the past. But as the situation stands right now, it sounds like a very bad place for you.
I'm sorry you are going through this and I hope you find some good help here.
I dont know even if my boyfriend really does. I feel like I dont know who he is anymore. And I know its mostly because Im in shock right now.
Thanks again and take care of yourself too.
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Originally Posted by Nina Kay
Hi Crystalbuterfly and Welcome to SR. I'm sorry that you're not getting many replies, but others should be along soon to share their experiences with you.
I don't know much, but my grown son's drug of choice is Meth. I've heard it called the devil's drug. It's really bad. I do know that it's very addictive. My son has been using it for over 10 years. It is a type of speed. You can just google it & you will find out alot more than you could ever want to know. It's a very progressive & addictive drug. It is one that is almost impossible to recover from. Please consider your own health, happiness & safety & that of your baby too.
I don't know much, but my grown son's drug of choice is Meth. I've heard it called the devil's drug. It's really bad. I do know that it's very addictive. My son has been using it for over 10 years. It is a type of speed. You can just google it & you will find out alot more than you could ever want to know. It's a very progressive & addictive drug. It is one that is almost impossible to recover from. Please consider your own health, happiness & safety & that of your baby too.
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Originally Posted by cynical one
Meth IS one of the bad ones as it permanently turns parts of the brain literally to mush. Statistically he has about a 6% chance of recovery. It doesn’t matter how he uses it, but it’s crap that he only uses it in OJ. Police have a special protocol that they use when dealing with meth addicts because of their tendency for extreme sudden violence.
Please get yourself tested for all STD’s, Heps and HIV. Do this for you, but also for the health of the child you are carrying.
It’s late, more will be along in the morning.
Just curious, have you actually seen any of the “savings” money or know for a fact that he is actually working two jobs?
Please get yourself tested for all STD’s, Heps and HIV. Do this for you, but also for the health of the child you are carrying.
It’s late, more will be along in the morning.
Just curious, have you actually seen any of the “savings” money or know for a fact that he is actually working two jobs?
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Originally Posted by cynical one
How long have you known him and/or been dating him?
Edited to add:
You're in an abusive relationship, violence always escalates. A DV shelter would be a great source of help for you.
Edited to add:
You're in an abusive relationship, violence always escalates. A DV shelter would be a great source of help for you.
And yeah he did get a part time job and it was because one of his friends works there and said they had an opening . And he says when he is there they do drugs. And he is telling me he will leave all his friends and stay away from everything that is bad for him. Like the girl in our house that he was about to mate with Im guessing, or maybe not her. Its so sick. How can anyone be so sick, yoru normal and then you get invovled in things so siiick and disgusting. I cant wrap my head around it.
You mean it doesnt work the same in juice, or you dont think he just uses it in juice. he drinks a freaking lot of juice now that I think about it. I kept telling him he wa losing weight and never had time to eat. He said he was so busy and he ate when he was out. Now i know its a effect of taking the drug and he has no appetite.
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Welcome to SR, crystalbutterfly. I am sorry for the crisis in your life because of your meth-addict boyfriend. It is true, as said above, that meth is a terrible, dark form of drug abuse. And because of this, both you and the baby you are carrying are in extreme danger.
Meth addicts are so violent that the police have certain protocols for dealing with them. The drug speeds the addict up, he becomes aggressive, raging, and he often becomes paranoid and believes that people are about to destroy him. There are stories of meth addict mothers who killed their own children when the addict mothers were experiencing meth psychosis--this is when meth makes the user completely disconnect from reality and is convinced that the people around him or her are aliens from outer space, or persons with intent to murder, or any number of delusions. Meth addicts when high are incredibly strong and often feel no pain when hit or even shot.
As well, meth stimulates sexual aggression. Meth addicts can perform intercourse for a much longer period of time than normal men, and their wives are often raped and abused by them as a result. And because the addict can be delusional, a meth addict's daughter can also be in grave danger of being raped. Meth addicts become predatory when sexually aroused.
Meth addicts will progress from ingesting the drug to smoking it and to shooting up. When a meth addict ingests, it takes about 30 minutes to get high. If he shoots up, it takes about 15 seconds.
Meth addicts go on runs, they have superhuman energy and stay awake for days. When they crash they experience massive exhaustion and major depression. In this state their families may feel sorry for them and let them come back home. Then another nightmare starts within days or weeks.
Crystal, you have a moral responsibility to protect the child you are carrying. Being shoved to the ground was a sign from your higher power, your guardian angel, whatever holy spirit you believe in, that you face a violent future with your boyfriend if you try to stay with him. But Crystal, even if you are willing to take that risk, it will be an immoral act if you put a helpless infant in such danger.
I have a feeling you will not want to hear us here when we tell you that things are very dark for you if you go anywhere near this young man, and that there is very little hope for love, security, and happiness with this young man. He is not going to stop using for a long, long time. And if your child lives with him or is left alone with him, your child may die as a result of his violence.
Your sister did the right thing. You did not overreact. What happened to you is going to happen again and again. You will be sexually betrayed, you will be sexually abused, you will be physically assaulted. This is the life of the partner of a meth addict.
Please call 1-800-799-SAFE and ask for a local number where you can get counseling and support to free yourself from a man who is a danger to you and to the child you are carrying. You cannot face him alone, you cannot handle this alone. Alone, you will be lost. You will be hurt.
You do not want to give him up. We all know that.
But Crystal, he is going to be the one who throws you out one day. It is best if you leave first.
You deserve a home that is a sanctuary of peace, Crystal, a loving, safe environment for you and your precious newborn. You have a high calling, becoming a mother of a small innocent child, and that child deserves to go to sleep at night unafraid and to have a mother who is not crazy with fear and pain. Both you and your baby can live a healthy life filled with love and joy. And only you can make the right choices to ensure that. No one else but you can determine the standards by which you will live and by which you will raise your child.
We hope you will choose a safe life. And that can only be possible if you refuse to be partner to an unstable, volatile, violent meth addict.
Meth addicts are so violent that the police have certain protocols for dealing with them. The drug speeds the addict up, he becomes aggressive, raging, and he often becomes paranoid and believes that people are about to destroy him. There are stories of meth addict mothers who killed their own children when the addict mothers were experiencing meth psychosis--this is when meth makes the user completely disconnect from reality and is convinced that the people around him or her are aliens from outer space, or persons with intent to murder, or any number of delusions. Meth addicts when high are incredibly strong and often feel no pain when hit or even shot.
As well, meth stimulates sexual aggression. Meth addicts can perform intercourse for a much longer period of time than normal men, and their wives are often raped and abused by them as a result. And because the addict can be delusional, a meth addict's daughter can also be in grave danger of being raped. Meth addicts become predatory when sexually aroused.
Meth addicts will progress from ingesting the drug to smoking it and to shooting up. When a meth addict ingests, it takes about 30 minutes to get high. If he shoots up, it takes about 15 seconds.
Meth addicts go on runs, they have superhuman energy and stay awake for days. When they crash they experience massive exhaustion and major depression. In this state their families may feel sorry for them and let them come back home. Then another nightmare starts within days or weeks.
Crystal, you have a moral responsibility to protect the child you are carrying. Being shoved to the ground was a sign from your higher power, your guardian angel, whatever holy spirit you believe in, that you face a violent future with your boyfriend if you try to stay with him. But Crystal, even if you are willing to take that risk, it will be an immoral act if you put a helpless infant in such danger.
I have a feeling you will not want to hear us here when we tell you that things are very dark for you if you go anywhere near this young man, and that there is very little hope for love, security, and happiness with this young man. He is not going to stop using for a long, long time. And if your child lives with him or is left alone with him, your child may die as a result of his violence.
Your sister did the right thing. You did not overreact. What happened to you is going to happen again and again. You will be sexually betrayed, you will be sexually abused, you will be physically assaulted. This is the life of the partner of a meth addict.
Please call 1-800-799-SAFE and ask for a local number where you can get counseling and support to free yourself from a man who is a danger to you and to the child you are carrying. You cannot face him alone, you cannot handle this alone. Alone, you will be lost. You will be hurt.
You do not want to give him up. We all know that.
But Crystal, he is going to be the one who throws you out one day. It is best if you leave first.
You deserve a home that is a sanctuary of peace, Crystal, a loving, safe environment for you and your precious newborn. You have a high calling, becoming a mother of a small innocent child, and that child deserves to go to sleep at night unafraid and to have a mother who is not crazy with fear and pain. Both you and your baby can live a healthy life filled with love and joy. And only you can make the right choices to ensure that. No one else but you can determine the standards by which you will live and by which you will raise your child.
We hope you will choose a safe life. And that can only be possible if you refuse to be partner to an unstable, volatile, violent meth addict.
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Thank you Englishgarden. A lot of what you posted is what I have felt, but I mean he has only been at it a little while and right now I cant imagine how much worse he could get. I mean after the other day with him, I mean you are right he has the potential to go completely crazy. But how do you accept that with someone that you love, and someone that was not like this months ago. I think Im in shock right now. and overwhelmed with everything. It just hurts so bad. I cant ever be free of him even if he turns into the monster like you talked about. I mean yes I could get a restraining order and all that but that wouldnt work and we all know it. He just has to get help and he has to get better.
Thank you so much for everything you said. It helps and Im going to read it over and over. I am safe here at his parents house right now. Im not at a place where I can do more than this right now. Not emotionally. I just couldnt stay with him partly afraid but mostly just sick and distgusted.
Thank you so much for everything you said. It helps and Im going to read it over and over. I am safe here at his parents house right now. Im not at a place where I can do more than this right now. Not emotionally. I just couldnt stay with him partly afraid but mostly just sick and distgusted.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 5
Hey Crystal, so glad you're in a place of safety. Take time to get calm, it's no wonder you're feeling overwhelmed.
You say you feel can't ever be free of him (because of the baby) , please consider what English Garden says - " he is going to be the one who throws you out one day. It is best if you leave first. " You may become free of him for many reasons and you are not trapped. I was a single mum, (not the most perfect mum in the world
, it can be done.
Keep reading on the forums -this is my first time posting, I found this forum a few days ago and haven't stopped reading for days ....helping to get my sanity back.
You say you feel can't ever be free of him (because of the baby) , please consider what English Garden says - " he is going to be the one who throws you out one day. It is best if you leave first. " You may become free of him for many reasons and you are not trapped. I was a single mum, (not the most perfect mum in the world
, it can be done.Keep reading on the forums -this is my first time posting, I found this forum a few days ago and haven't stopped reading for days
....helping to get my sanity back.
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: PM me....
Posts: 468
Crystal,
Have you been to KCI.org?
It is a meth message board like this one, only specifically meth.
I suggest that you go and post your story there as well.
My daughter has been addicted to meth for 17 years now (off and on) only off of it while in prison, which is where she is for the 3rd time. She's lost custody of her 2 children. She has worked very very hard to get off of it but it always calls her back.
All drugs are bad...but, I personally believe that meth is the very worst. There is nothing about it that is organic like the other drugs. It's made with Sudafed, farm chemicals and a whole list of nasty man made chemicals.
Addiction is progressive....left untreated, it NEVER gets better....
The child you are carrying has a 50% chance of having the genetic precursor to addiction.
Whether you stay with him or not. Whether he seeks recovery or not....no matter what...you are already in the middle of a really really bad situation. I'm really sorry to say.....
But the great news is....you can save yourself. And I can promise you that you CANNOT save him. There is NOTHING you can do except enable him....and that will just make things worse all the way around.
Have you been to KCI.org?
It is a meth message board like this one, only specifically meth.
I suggest that you go and post your story there as well.
My daughter has been addicted to meth for 17 years now (off and on) only off of it while in prison, which is where she is for the 3rd time. She's lost custody of her 2 children. She has worked very very hard to get off of it but it always calls her back.
All drugs are bad...but, I personally believe that meth is the very worst. There is nothing about it that is organic like the other drugs. It's made with Sudafed, farm chemicals and a whole list of nasty man made chemicals.
Addiction is progressive....left untreated, it NEVER gets better....
The child you are carrying has a 50% chance of having the genetic precursor to addiction.
Whether you stay with him or not. Whether he seeks recovery or not....no matter what...you are already in the middle of a really really bad situation. I'm really sorry to say.....
But the great news is....you can save yourself. And I can promise you that you CANNOT save him. There is NOTHING you can do except enable him....and that will just make things worse all the way around.
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Thanks for your replies YearforMe and Seagreen, and for being here in the middle of my night. Cant sleep at all. Ive been reading here and elsewhere. I dont think I have looked at the sight you mentioned. Ive seen a LOT of nasty stuff though. What it does to your body, your teeth, your brain. And I know all drugs are bad but this one seems really bad and why I cannot understand except he says he started to stay awake and have energy and his friend uses it and that how he got it. But I dont know what is true anymore from him. But you are really right Seagreen Im really emotional right now and feel like Im in some sort of shock and I cant really make decisions I dont think exceot basic things like I have to be away from him, and I have to quiet down and stop my head from going all these different directions until I really get a feel for what will happen next with him. He says he will get into treatment but he hasnt yet. His parents are helping him with that. If he does, then I can go home at least and have time to think. I hate to say this but I will. I dont know if given everything i know now, if I want to have this baby with him. And it hurts os bad to even think that because we both have wanted a family after I graduated and we bought a house in a couple years.
we were the ones who planned and had goals, and he is just taking all my dreams away, All fo mine and all of his. I dont know just thanks s=for listening to me tonight.
we were the ones who planned and had goals, and he is just taking all my dreams away, All fo mine and all of his. I dont know just thanks s=for listening to me tonight.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
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Crystal, I know how heatbreaking it is to give up those dreams, and you will grieve for them. Allow yourself to be sad for them -you will dream again, believe me.
I don't know anything about crystal meth only cocaine and alcohol, mostly. I do know how it feels to be abused and the shame i felt allowing those thing to carry on while I was bringing up my son. I know how sick I became over the years. I can only describe it as being sucked into a whirlwind of confusion, numbing fear and helplessness.
Even if he goes into treatment, even if he get's well, it's so important to keep focusing on you and keeping you sane. My partner is 3.5 years clean and I still trip myself up, forgetting myself and being tossed around by his behaviour - recovery is no magic wand, apparently
!
Sending you such a big hug, take extra special care of you at the moment, be super kind to yourself - you've been thu the mill and you need rest, especially if you need to make life changing decisions about the baby.
I don't know anything about crystal meth only cocaine and alcohol, mostly. I do know how it feels to be abused and the shame i felt allowing those thing to carry on while I was bringing up my son. I know how sick I became over the years. I can only describe it as being sucked into a whirlwind of confusion, numbing fear and helplessness.
Even if he goes into treatment, even if he get's well, it's so important to keep focusing on you and keeping you sane. My partner is 3.5 years clean and I still trip myself up, forgetting myself and being tossed around by his behaviour - recovery is no magic wand, apparently
!Sending you such a big hug, take extra special care of you at the moment, be super kind to yourself - you've been thu the mill and you need rest, especially if you need to make life changing decisions about the baby.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Welcome to SR. This a great forum. Everyone here understands what it's like to love someone who has been hijacked by drugs.
I always have trouble responding to young women who are in relationships with drug addicts. I am not a fortune teller so I cant read the future but I can share my story. I can share what I know about being married to an addict (divorced him many years ago)......and having an adult son who is an addict.
Your future will be determined by the decisions you make today. Each decision we make weaves the fabric of our lives. Addiction has weaved a lot of very very dark threads through my life. Much pain and anguish. It's one thing to have an addict as a boyfriend. It's entirely another thing to have an addict as a husband. And the anguish of having an addicted son........can't even describe it.
Meth is my son's DOC. It's an insidious drug. He is currently homeless. His body is deteriorating. He is unemployable. He was once a strong, athletic, and Hollywood handsome young man. A firefighter. Watching this happen to another person.....slowly.....over the course of years is dreadful. But watching it happen to my son......
Addiction is a progressive disease. It is cunning. It is a family disease that has other victims....not just the addict. I became every bit as sick as my son during my efforts to "get him well".
So what do I have to offer you in the way of hope? I don't regret anything that has happened in my life.....there are many blessings that have come along that might not have happened had I made different choices......but I do wish that I had embraced a program of recovery for myself all those years ago (Al-Anon or Nar-Anon). The life lessons I've learned from those programs have been life altering for me.
Take care of you first......
gentle hugs
ke
I always have trouble responding to young women who are in relationships with drug addicts. I am not a fortune teller so I cant read the future but I can share my story. I can share what I know about being married to an addict (divorced him many years ago)......and having an adult son who is an addict.
Your future will be determined by the decisions you make today. Each decision we make weaves the fabric of our lives. Addiction has weaved a lot of very very dark threads through my life. Much pain and anguish. It's one thing to have an addict as a boyfriend. It's entirely another thing to have an addict as a husband. And the anguish of having an addicted son........can't even describe it.
Meth is my son's DOC. It's an insidious drug. He is currently homeless. His body is deteriorating. He is unemployable. He was once a strong, athletic, and Hollywood handsome young man. A firefighter. Watching this happen to another person.....slowly.....over the course of years is dreadful. But watching it happen to my son......
Addiction is a progressive disease. It is cunning. It is a family disease that has other victims....not just the addict. I became every bit as sick as my son during my efforts to "get him well".
So what do I have to offer you in the way of hope? I don't regret anything that has happened in my life.....there are many blessings that have come along that might not have happened had I made different choices......but I do wish that I had embraced a program of recovery for myself all those years ago (Al-Anon or Nar-Anon). The life lessons I've learned from those programs have been life altering for me.
Take care of you first......
gentle hugs
ke
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 540
Crystal, I'm so glad you've gotten more posts from folks with really, really good advice and experience with this horrible drug. I know you're in shock and it's hard to make decisions. Time will help make things clearer. You need to deal with things one at a time, and step one would be to get yourself to a safe place. I would also suggest a restraining order. Yeah, they don't always work, but it sets the groundwork for more legal action if he breaks it. What a terrible situation for you, so very sad what drugs and alcohol can do to a person. I'm so glad your here and please keep us informed as to how you are doing. Take care. You sound like a very smart, compassionate, loving person and you deserve a better life. (((crystal))).
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
Here are some of the common ingredients in Crystal Meth:
Acetone
Alcohol
Anhydrous ammonia
Battery acid
Benzene
Bronchodialators
Camera batteries
Camp stove fuel
Chloroform
Cold tablets
Diet aids
Drain cleaner
Energy boosters
Ephedrine
Ether (starting fluid)
Freon
Gasoline additives/Rubbing Alcohol
Iodine
Iodine crystals
Lithium from batteries
Meth causes serious brain damage.
Acetone
Alcohol
Anhydrous ammonia
Battery acid
Benzene
Bronchodialators
Camera batteries
Camp stove fuel
Chloroform
Cold tablets
Diet aids
Drain cleaner
Energy boosters
Ephedrine
Ether (starting fluid)
Freon
Gasoline additives/Rubbing Alcohol
Iodine
Iodine crystals
Lithium from batteries
Meth causes serious brain damage.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 267
Crystal, I have no experience with meth addicts, so I can't add to the excellent information you've gotten so far.
I do have experience with the craziness that's caused when you love addicts, however - I come from a family with the disease - my father, brother, and son all suffered/suffer from alcoholism and addiction. You have just been dealt a horrible blow - and are bound to be reeling. You are also in early pregnancy, which is a time when raging hormones can create havoc in the brain. In addition to getting yourself to AlAnon or NarAnon, I also urge you to see a counselor who can help through the decisions you need to make about your pregnancy. This is just to insane for you to deal with on your own, even with the great support you'll find here at SR.
I do have experience with the craziness that's caused when you love addicts, however - I come from a family with the disease - my father, brother, and son all suffered/suffer from alcoholism and addiction. You have just been dealt a horrible blow - and are bound to be reeling. You are also in early pregnancy, which is a time when raging hormones can create havoc in the brain. In addition to getting yourself to AlAnon or NarAnon, I also urge you to see a counselor who can help through the decisions you need to make about your pregnancy. This is just to insane for you to deal with on your own, even with the great support you'll find here at SR.
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