BF decided to stay in rehab

Old 06-20-2012, 09:05 AM
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BF decided to stay in rehab

So I posted before about how my bf wanted to leave recovery etc. Well he was EXTREMELY mean to me when I visited him and he said that I was trying to force him to stay there...blah. anyway, he stayed.

He called me to apologize and wrote me a letter saying he was really sorry. I just don't know, I said I'd leave if he left but he's staying now and I want to be with him. However, I cannot be codependent, so I haven't said it was "OK" I told him how hurt I was. He understood.

He's also dealing with jealousy since he can't be around me.

Oh I dunno, I'm lost.
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Old 06-20-2012, 09:16 AM
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Yeah, see, I'm stuck in my justification I guess. I think "he was overwhelmed with having to stay, he is jealous because he can't be around me" etc. We are so similar and fit perfectly together minus addiction. So I guess that's what I'm getting hung up on...:/
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Old 06-20-2012, 10:57 AM
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Jealousy is not a reason to behave badly. It's an excuse.
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Old 06-20-2012, 02:57 PM
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Thank you all.

Yeah, I'm not jealous nor am I mean.

You all are very right, obviously.

Thank you all, again
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Old 06-20-2012, 03:00 PM
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It sounds like he is in the right place. Focus your energy on yourself. Hugs
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Old 06-20-2012, 03:01 PM
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We codies see one glimmer of hope and we want to jump right back in the vortex feet first. He doesn't need an answer now, he needs to get through his recovery stint, then he should go into a sober living home. In the meatime, you need to work on you, and, your codependency issues.

If it were me, I'd get to meetings and read Codependent No More.

What's the rush?
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