lostheragain

My wife is addicted to painkillers. she has tried to quit before and i had thought that she did but have recently found out that she is still on them. We do have a very good and positive relationship no abusive behavior and a nice peacefull household. no joint children are involved, she has 2 both grown and out of the house. my biggest fear other than her health is the legal ramifications. doeing what she does she could lose her job or be arrested. i do not want to divorce her or leave yet but i do not want the liability of her actions. i am considering a legal seperation. the question i have is that if we did legally seperate, could we still cohabitate? i went from being financially healthy to broke and desperate a few years ago and do not want to go through that again should she get in trouble before she quits. just wondering if this is a viable way to go about it. my state does not recognize common law marriage so that is a plus for me i think should we go this route.
thanks

Kindeyes

hmmmm.....I'm not an attorney and this is really a legal question. I suggest you consult with an attorney and find out what your options are. I know someone who specifically divorced to keep from being totally taken down the drain financially. They were still "together" but divorced simply to avoid total financial destruction. It worked for them. They are still "together" today.

Welcome to SR......this is a great place for support for those who love someone who is addicted.

gentle hugs
ke

lostheragain

thanks, i need to do that, when i get a chance i will. have not yet figured out how to tell her i know shes using again

TMZ

Welcome to SR.
I am sorry for what you are having to endure but advice to that extent is not fair for us to give. It is your life and you only know what is best for your situation.

Addiction is a disease, as other diseases have no real cure there is hope, there is recovery. If you are going to detach detach with love.



I just don't want you to think we don't care. But advice like that is not easily given. For we don't have to live with the fall out. It's your life not mine.

Keep reading and posting we will be here to support you, and help you, but the final decision is your to make. Take what works for you and leave the rest.

Be well,

lostheragain

thank you tmz i have decided what i am going to do and when. you are in st louis? that is only a couple of hours away. i have to get a few things straightened out for me financially in the next few weeks then i will confront her with it and give her the choice to continue with the drugs without me or stay with me and be clean. my biggest fear is that she might choose the drugs
thanks again

YearForMe

My husband is addicted to Hydrocodone (Vicodin).

He has a script for it from the doctor....the doctor keeps refilling it.

I am not giving you legal advice....just commenting....
If she is obtaining the pills via script, I can't think of a way she could get in trouble.
Unless she took way too many, drove...got pulled over and they determined she was OWI.

If she is buying off the street or over the internet and gets caught with them...absolutely she can get into trouble. Possession of a controlled substance without a prescription.

TMZ

Hay look there is no good reason to put off letting the addict know that there addiction is affecting the rest of the family.

If there is an elephant in the room lets talk about it not try to ignore it. I mean it is an elephant and it is a big issue.