EnglishGarden

"She spends time with him every day."

"She holds him on a pedestal."

"She is pushing me away. . . ."

And she's 3 weeks clean from a drug habit.

All hard to read. Put on your seat belt, gbuehrle.

We will be here for what is to come your way, which is bound to be very painful.

Stick with Al-Anon, SR, any other oases of sanity you can find, gb. You are outnumbered by crazies right now, and you need all the support you can get.

We are glad you have joined us.

bluebelle

That sounds like a very scary situation. You can't control your gf's choices, but you can make choices as to what is the safest situation for you. Your gf has made repeated choices to be addicted to drugs, be addicted to this man, addicted to drugs, and back to the man. I understand that you are concerned about her, but it is most important that you are in a safe place first. Is your situation safe? Do you feel comfortable at her house? Do you feel safe to be around him? My advice would be to remove yourself from situations where you could be put in danger.

It's back to the oxygen mask story again. If you are on an airplane, and the oxygen masks deploy, you are supposed to put the oxygen mask on yourself first. Then, you are able to help the people around you. I second the idea of getting a restraining order. You can make a list of everything that happens, dates, times, etc., to use with the police. However, you will still have to do your part which may mean that you will have to stay out of situations that could put you in danger.

bluebelle

Just so you know, I'm speaking from a voice of experience. My mom was in repeated dangerous relationships with men, and sometimes things got violent. She has a tendency to creat chaos around her, and the situations can get dangerous quickly. She is also a drug addict.

tjp613

There is NO way, NO how I would be in this relationship. WAY too many wonderful women out there to be putting my life in danger for a drug addicted, cult-worshiping, two-timing, very confused girl. Sheesh.