having trouble
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: dow, illinois
Posts: 71
having trouble
I was looking forward to my first meeting tonight, nar alon. Now i catch myself looking for excuses not to go. whats wrong with me? I keep thinking he wont be here when i get back, SICK ISNT IT.I no what i should be doing but still looking for excuses. Really any man should be lucky to have me, Why do i have to have this one. Because of 25 years togeather?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 134
Go to Naranon! Do you think when he goes out to score drugs, he's worrying that you won't be there when he gets home? Of course not.
In more words or less...DO YOU!
Get the help YOU need.
You obviously love this man but I cannot stress this enough...If you want a future with him, YOU BOTH NEED TO BE IN RECOVERY.
Naranon is an incredible group and you will find an amazing amount of strength from being involved. Do something for yourself. I'm sure you deserve it!
Wishing you nothing but the best! Stay strong.
In more words or less...DO YOU!
Get the help YOU need.
You obviously love this man but I cannot stress this enough...If you want a future with him, YOU BOTH NEED TO BE IN RECOVERY.
Naranon is an incredible group and you will find an amazing amount of strength from being involved. Do something for yourself. I'm sure you deserve it!
Wishing you nothing but the best! Stay strong.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Savannah Georgia
Posts: 124
Dearest Jolinda,
I understand, I understand, I understand! Boy do I ever understand! You feel that way because you still falsely believe that what you say or do will determine what he does! Takes one to know one, so please don't think I am trying to be preachy! Just today I posted about whether or not I should take my kids to the beach and leave my NEWLY RAH home alone. The sad thing is, I actually occasionally still believe I have that kind of power! lol! The truth is, Jolinda, Joe is going to use or Joe isn't going to use and it won't have a blessed thing to do with anything you say or do, meeting or no meeting, etc. All I am trying to say is Do Something Nice For Yourself. A meeting is a great place to start, because if you are like me, there probably aren't tons of public places you really feel like being right now. I know I can't deal with "pretending all is well" around lots of people when I am falling apart inside. An NA meeting allows you to be yourself, let it all out, grieve, share, focus on YOU! We are all here with you! HUGS TO YOU!!!
I understand, I understand, I understand! Boy do I ever understand! You feel that way because you still falsely believe that what you say or do will determine what he does! Takes one to know one, so please don't think I am trying to be preachy! Just today I posted about whether or not I should take my kids to the beach and leave my NEWLY RAH home alone. The sad thing is, I actually occasionally still believe I have that kind of power! lol! The truth is, Jolinda, Joe is going to use or Joe isn't going to use and it won't have a blessed thing to do with anything you say or do, meeting or no meeting, etc. All I am trying to say is Do Something Nice For Yourself. A meeting is a great place to start, because if you are like me, there probably aren't tons of public places you really feel like being right now. I know I can't deal with "pretending all is well" around lots of people when I am falling apart inside. An NA meeting allows you to be yourself, let it all out, grieve, share, focus on YOU! We are all here with you! HUGS TO YOU!!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: dow, illinois
Posts: 71
Im going
Im going , Im going. Told joe today i can let him go , if thats what he wants. And i meant it. Feeling a little stronger. oh, going to meeting ,yea. Let u guys no how it goes.Thanks
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: St. Louis, Mo. USA
Posts: 265
Do what you think you should, But I will urge you to go to the Nar-anon meeting.
I know the first is scary but you know what that one and every one since has given me peace and serenity. Now I have the power back, and I control ME.
Do it you won't regret it.
I know the first is scary but you know what that one and every one since has given me peace and serenity. Now I have the power back, and I control ME.
Do it you won't regret it.
Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by jolinda 
I was looking forward to my first meeting tonight, nar alon. Now i catch myself looking for excuses not to go. whats wrong with me? I keep thinking he wont be here when i get back, SICK ISNT IT.I no what i should be doing but still looking for excuses. Really any man should be lucky to have me, Why do i have to have this one. Because of 25 years togeather?
It is tough going through those doors the first time. I remember thinking to myself, what are they going to think of me? And well before that, when my AGF was acting up, I believed I wasn't part of the problem and it was all her fault.
Silly me.
So, I sucked it up and I went. Saved my life, Jolinda. It began the process of me reclaiming my life. And you know what, my AGF didn't like that too much. That's why she's my AXGF now.
The people I've met in meetings had the same fears and the same anxieties as I did. But they stuck with it. They got better. And so many of them are so wise.
You have nothing to lose by trying. And everything to gain.
ZoSo
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
Originally Posted by jolinda
Im going , Im going. Told joe today i can let him go , if thats what he wants. And i meant it. Feeling a little stronger. oh, going to meeting ,yea. Let u guys no how it goes.Thanks
What do you want that you control?
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