ajnaT

I wouldn't even talk with him about it. He is already angry, more angry than he seems on the surface. He is extremely paranoid. You could be putting yourself at risk of serious physical abuse if you bring it up with him.

I saw a neighbour's wife get collected by ambulance after lying on the kitchen floor for a whole weekend with a knife in her chest because she dared to broach the subject of leaving to her partner.

He's a selfish man, meth is a selfish drug like any other and has a vile personality of it's own.

It's good that you have packed a few precious belongings but don't let him see that you have done that. Get as many affairs in order as quickly as you can and get out of there. People want to help you and they are seeing the situation from an even nastier perspective than you are because you are confused. That is how bystanders are.

I won't sugar coat my opinions about the never-before-seen lows a meth user will go to to get what he/she needs and those needs include love and attention. He does not deserve that from you. There are people who care about you and are worried sick. I am one of them. :ghug3

outtolunch

Clearing his head ! That's a good one.

What's honesty got to do with this? He's addicted to Meth. He cannot just snap out of it.

No need to alert his employer. His behaviors will cost him his job sooner or later.

Please focus on protecting your child and yourself.

EnglishGarden

DO NOT CONFRONT this man about leaving him while your child is in the home.

Leave the child with a friend or relative. Alert the friend or relative of the conversation scheduled and whether or not you have chosen a guardian for your child in the event of your death.

You really must understand that in meth psychosis, he may kill you.

Even not in psychosis, he is paranoid and violent on meth.

I would not expect him to be sober and rational for the conversation. He will want to be powerful and he gets power from meth.

Oh, how I wish you would head out that door right now, with your child, and walk into a domestic violence center and follow every direction from those people.

Your intention to have a "conversation about the relationship" with a meth addict terrifies me.

YearForMe

Wifeinark,

I agree with everything English Garden posted above.

This is based on my experience(s) with my meth addicted daughter.
She has said some of the most evil and vile things you could ever imagine.

She has also become extremely violent at times. She once bit a police officer's hand while in the midst of being arrested and handcuffed. And that was early on in her addiction.

It is my own personal opinion that the nature of this man made drug of a trash can variety of chemicals.....is that....the closer you are to them...the more they know about you and your soft spots. They zero right in on your shame/guilt center and if you are strong enough, educated enough about the drug, addiction how this all works.......
and you are able to keep from getting tangled up in your mind with their "triangle of drama" (google it...it is an actual thing)......

If you are strong enough to keep it all straight and together during the conversation...that is the signal to them that they are no longer in control....and THAT situation becomes terrifyingly dangerous...because they have to do something drastic to try to keep you in the loop. Or something drastic enough to get you out of the way.
Because YOU are standing in the way of them and their drug use.

Nobody in my entire family was ever emotionally, physically or mentally strong enough to have any kind of reasonable conversation with my daughter while she was under the influence of meth. Or anytime within the first 6-12 months of any type of sobriety or recovery.

ctg492

My son was addicted to vikes and took/ shot everything else in the course of 6+ years. It was Meth that took him down in the end. Over the 5 month period of taking it last summer, the crazy calls were only something that is believable to someone who has been through it. The: they are going to kill me, gave me rat poison, police are looking for me, I did something but don't know what really bad, checking himself into the hospital ward/walking out three times on and on on. These things paled the money/housing and job issues of the rest of the years of addiction.
He lost so much weight, by the time we picked up him he looked like a shell of the man we had seen. The Fire in his eyes, the Pain that must be inside from fighting with the demons inside, the person jumping up and down in the kitchen saying "Help ME please, it is Meth" yet needing it so badly, is hard to watch.
He stayed clean for 60 days after ICU and then the cravings of getting ready to relapse sent him into a mental state of crumbling, I only now semi understand what was killing him. We got him to a addiction specialist and My son sought help that was offered he had a choice that day as he sat curled up in the office, we stepped aside and left the room. He is recovering now, he is focused and never forgets, understands the lifetime of recovery ahead. It is a LONG road to walk. He has been clean close to 6 months. We have never seen or known the man he is now, since the drugs have been in his life since a teen. No false sense of security or blinders on for Us or Him, it is day to day. Today to speak to him is like a normal conversation. I know if he had not sought help on his own, he would have never made it this far. (nor would I, I am a different person now)
My heart bleeds for those that are gripped by this epidemic that is out there today. I think it is the problem of the era. The families it will tear apart, the children that will be lost, the deaths. Everyday I see Meth Lab Bust in the assorted papers I read. Each person has a story I know now. I look at the sad faces in the pictures and know they were/are loved by someone.