December2011

I am triggered as well by parents who put their kids in harms way, but I am so glad that they are here, it is a big step for some. I am aware of the cycle of abuse, and how these woman are systematically programed- turning even the most attractive, confident woman into a mess. These women often do not see the reality of what is happening. Often times their kids are all they have and they think that if they are "good" mothers somehow they are shielding their kids. They are often extremely isolated and their self worth can be almost nonexistent.

Coming here helps take them out of that isolation and starts the recovery and healing for them.... that is a wonderful thing. Thank God for SR . Finally the internet put to good use!

December2011

Check this out guys. Talk about a trigger post. This was only a few months ago. This was part of one of my threads.

Back again… my son was in recovery from shooting oxy.. he got in the methadone clinic and was doing ok… but now he is on the methadone plus crack and booze. He was doing well, had a job , a place, and now it has all gone to hell( 2 car wreaks, spent college money on crack) He has moved back in with me and my BF of 5 years. My BF will not tolerate the drug addicted son anymore. I fear I am going to lose the love of my life… my BF, because I cannot let my son be on the street and toss him out. I am going to have to take care of my drug addicted son forever….. My son lived with us before and stole form us and was horrid , so I understand how my BF feels…………….. life is a mess. Any happiness that I had in life if over.
I do not buy into the codependent thing anymore.... I will fix this.. if it kills me. I will never give up.

See, what I mean LOL. Thanks guys again for kicking my butt(in a loving way)! whew did I need it.

Windmills

Hmm, feeling guilt for sharing is a new one on me. Maybe SR isn't a good place for me after all? I'm not sure, I need to think about that.

KelleyF

What do you mean Windmills?

December2011

The whole trigger thing to me just means that sometimes my own feelings get in the way of helping others, and I try to control them because of personal experiences. I take their story too personally sometimes. Remember, many of us are recovering codies, and fixing people is what we did for a long time, and in my case- what I still catch myself doing, but I am a newbie.

But despite these issues, there are some of the most caring, loving individuals you will know right here in SR.

Please don’t feel bad. You are an exceptional young lady. I think your story is invaluable to other young moms, and I hope you stick around…. No pressure he he

Windmills

Thankyou I think I'm pretty touchy at the moment over the whole parent issue, I should probably try to turn myself down a notch or four!

Ann

Triggered or not, something I try to be careful of when I post is to ask myself the question "is my post helpful and/or supportive"...or am I just striking back with my opinion?

When I was a newcomer here, my life was a mess, I was making bad choices and any idiot could see things needed to change...any idiot except that idiot "me". If people had attacked me, I would have run and never come back...that would have helped nobody. By luck I was welcomed just as I was and encouraged to stick around and learn better ways to live. When I knew better, I did better.

That was 10 years ago today. I am glad that I met the reception I did when I came, because this past 10 years have been the most growing and wonderful years of my life.

Hugs

dbh

Good Morning,

Heading off to work but just wanted to quickly post that my original posting was about ME and something that I observed in myself. I wasn't trying to blame anyone or convince someone to stop posting.

In my humble opinion, we need everyone here (at all stages of recovery). We are each an important part of helping each other on our own individual recovery journeys.

Also, triggers to me are not necessarily bad things. It usually shows me areas in which I need to grow.

TGIF!

Fondly,

db

CanfixONLYme

I really like this post and everyone's responses... We are all here for a reason and some days ate better than others and wow, these topics are very emotional for all.

In fact, they are all potentially life altering (positive and/or negative). Life or death situations for us and our addicted loved ones. No wonder why we get "triggered".

Have a wonderful sleep everyone,