Old 02-22-2012, 09:30 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Pa
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My boyfriend relapsed yesterday after almost a month being out of rehab.

I'm overwhelmingly sad. I guess I had hoped he'd be one of the lucky few that would make it without relapsing. And now I realize it was stupid of me to hang on to that hope, it only ended up hurting me more in the long run.

On the positive though, he did admit it to me, his counselor, and his parents the day after and has asked that he be placed back into inpatient and had expressed interest in going to a sober house after.

I'm happy about that.

But it's just difficult, because emotionally I feel like I'm right back to square one all over again. I really don't want to deal with these emotions all over again.

Not really sure what kind of boundaries I should be setting right now. I told him I would not stay through another period of active addiction when he got out of rehab.
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Old 02-22-2012, 09:56 PM
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Im sorry to hear of your boyfriend's relapse. That is so difficult, especially with the energy that he (and you probably spent as well) emotionally going through rehab.

Good for you in setting boundaries - that is very strong, smart and wise. My ex husband was in rehab for the 4th time about a year ago, came out and went into a very long, active relapse for 6 months. Brutal. He basically came to his own conclusion to move into a sober house, and has been doing well since.

Keep your strength. I think the road post rehab is a tough one, but it sounds like you have a strong sense of self and good head on your shoulders. During my ex's time of relapse, I found a lot of strength here from others.

Hang in there!
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Old 02-22-2012, 10:27 PM
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deluna, sorry you are going through a tough time - itsanewday2011 said it all perfectly: keep your strength and come here for support whenever you feel the need. I do and it's nice to know this refuge is here for us.

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Old 02-23-2012, 05:45 AM
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Rehabs aren't a cure, they are a training place to help recovering addicts find tools to keep themselves on a good path, or to find their way back if they stumble.

Let's hope he finds his way back. He knows what he needs to do, so far his actions sound good. Going back to rehab may or may not be the answer, but there are lots of other support groups out there where he can find support and help.

I'm glad you are taking care of yourself through all this. I know the gut kick feeling when relapse happens. But I also know that having our own support in place and working our own program will help us through the dark days.

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Old 02-23-2012, 06:09 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2011
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My son 26 has been in a 1/2wh for two months now. The first two weeks there were hard to adjust, no doubt. He or I do not think he could have got things in order with out it. He was clean for 2 months before going there and it was getting difficult, he knew what he had to do. Yesterday he told me he and the guys there were the lucky ones because they were there.
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Old 02-23-2012, 06:42 AM
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I think your boyfriend's honesty with you, his parents, and his counselor after only a day of relapsing is a very good sign. From your post it seems he's wanting to step up his recovery.
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