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turning my husband in

Old 02-16-2012, 02:10 PM
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turning my husband in

So, since my husband relapsed this weekend, 4 months from being off probation, I have gone through a lot and reached out for support. He admitted his relapse, we have spent days talking over it, what happened, how to move forward and so on. This morning I told him that if he had any in the house or anywhere and HE would like me to help him get rid of it that I will and I will not be angry and won't lecture him but that if he chooses to continue his current behavior and continues to use, whether it be today, tomorrow, next week, or months from now, I will call his probation officer. I told him that I love him but I will not be the reason he does not get better and I will not sit by so I will call and turn him in and he will face the consequences. He said he was done and had already got rid of the pipe. He just called me a little bit ago and asked if we could take his car to his moms and if I could take him to probation tomorrow to turn himself in. I said yes, and I supported his decision. I am not blind and very well know that tonight or tomorrow morning can come and he will say, “let’s just wait to see what the drug test came back as, maybe I am over reacting” but right now in the moment I have hope that he is ready to face what he has done and face the jail time and I pray to God that this will be his bottom and that something clicks with him and he gets it this time, and if not, well I will deal with that when it comes and if it means being a divorced women then that’s what it means.
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Old 02-16-2012, 04:09 PM
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Have to say in all honesty; I dont think I could report my BF; but if he decided to turn himself in, then I would support his decision.

But standing by your boundaries & your convictions - it shows a great deal of strength; and I respect that.

Best of luck tomorrow.
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Old 02-16-2012, 04:58 PM
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If he is not done with the ride…
And you actually take him tomorrow he will use that nicely against you and you will be the sole fault as to why he is back in jail, even though he suggested it…Nifty how that works.

If he changes his mind I would advise you to carefully look at your motives for turning him in, and it can’t be about any chance for him to get well nor can it be about getting him out of the house so you can finally have a break and a bit of peace….Peace is only found in working on you…

In case you haven’t been told or didn’t know … he doesn’t need your help to turn himself in and face an consequences of his actions nor does he need your help to stay trapped in his addiction, he can do both those things all by himself. And it is better if he does…
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