Girlfriend in need of advice.

Old 02-03-2012, 10:24 PM
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Girlfriend in need of advice.

Hello I'm new to this site but am in desperate need for advice. My boyfriend who's 25 and I'm 22, have been together for 5 1/2 years has done opiates for a couple of years without me knowing. I had seen a few before but he always had a good excuse for them. In October he died and was brought back to life. We both thought he was done until he started throwing up again and I confronted him. The next day he wanted to go to rehab as an inpatient so I took him. Hes been in there 15 days and today he had his first day pass. We were going to go out to eat but he started feeling uneasy so we went to the house instead. As we were pulling up he stated he wanted to go back to the facility. I guess I didn't think this process was so much of a mental process and don't know how to relate or know where he's coming from so he doesn't feel so alone. I don't care how long it takes for him to get better but I don't know what else I should expect just like I didn't expect him to freak out like he did. It scares me and I don't know who to turn to or if there is any advice or book I get read. Help and thanks.
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Old 02-03-2012, 11:00 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2011
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Hi leopard7 and welcome to SR! You have definitely made your way to the right place. I am very sorry for what you are going through right now. And while I am fairly new here myself, I have learned a lot from this site and all the wonderful people here. My fiance is in rehab also, he has been for the past 30 days and something that I have learned since he's been gone is he's where he needs to be and he's taking care of himself and I needed to use that time to focus on myself and that's exactly what I have done. I can't tell you how much of an eye opener it has been for me not to be so consumed with his addiction. What your boyfriend is going through is something that you won't be able to understand. He's going through a big change and there's no telling how he's going to handle all of it emotionally. Please believe me when I tell you that you will drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out. What you should do is take advantage of this time apart from him and work on YOURSELF. There is plenty of information on this forum about codependency and I strongly suggest that you take a look at it. There are so many people here that have been or are exactly where you're at right now and they have so much helpful advice to give and the support you will find here is amazing. Just keep an open mind and heart you will get so much more out of this site then you expected. I know I have and it really has been a lifesaver. You are in my thoughts and prayers, just keep your head up, it gets better
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Old 02-04-2012, 06:34 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2011
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hi leopard,

yes i agree with you it is scary , scary to watch and feel helpess , but the thing is there is nothing anyone can really do except the addict, you have come to the right place and will most definetly find alot of support here hope you stick around
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