How to stop worrying?
 

It's been almost a week since the latest incident with my son and my realization that he can no longer live here and that i have to stop "helping" him. But my anxiety/worry hasn't subsided one bit. If anything it's gotten worse I think. I can't eat, relax, unclench my jaws, or stop my hands from shaking. I have all these horrible thoughts running through my mind as I'm not sure where he is or how he's doing. I know he was referred to a program but also know it was his choice as to go or not. He could be there...or he could be on the streets.. For all I know he could be dead. Any advice from other moms in dealing with the worry? My hands are sore from praying, I've tried meditation but can't seem to focus. I made sure I haven't been alone as much as possible and have chosen to be with supportive people which has helped a little but no matter how much I try I just can't seem to even follow a conversation with others without drifting off to thoughts of my son. just can't stop.

(((heartbroken)))

Im not a mom but a dad, it has been more than three months for me since I told my son he had to leave and I have not heard from him as of yet. I let go and let God. I pray for him every morning, and every night. That is all I can do for him. As long as I don't get a call from the hospital or the police I know he is out here somewhere. He is smart enough to survive, and knows where to go for help. He has to fight the disease himself.

I read and post here and go to nar-anon meetings. That helps me detach with love and heal myself. I pray we both heal and someday we will be together as a family again. We have Faith, Hope, and Love, that will get us through this. With nar-anon I have met and know lots and lots of recovering addicts that have made it so I know God will bring him through this. As well as your son too.

Be well,

Had to delete as my copy paste just didn't work.

Worrying can become a habit, a place to hid when thing get uncomfortable.

Here are a few good quotes on worrying:

“Worry is like a rocking chair--it gives you something to do, but, it doesn't get you anywhere.” Unknown

"Worry often gives small things a big shadow" Unknown

"Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrows, it only saps today of its joy" Leo Buscaglia

"Every evening I turn my worries over to god...he's going to be up anyway" Mary C. Crowley

Worrying is counter productive, it accomplishs absolutely nothing.

If you can't get yourself together, you may want to consider therapy.

Take care.

Thank you all for your comments. Im going to print that poem cynical one. I just finished reading a book, don't let your kids kill,you: a guide to parents of drug and alcohol addicted children. It w.as very helpful and I'm sure I'll be reading it again and again.

I've been to a few different therapists, have yet to find someone I've considered to be very helpful. I've never been in therapy before all this started, so maybe I just don't get what it's suppose to be, but it just seems they listen to me but don't offer assistance. Am not saying I won't try it again, but I would only do so if I got a referral from another parent in my position so I'd know the person was actually equipped to help. The last lady I wen to was so sweet but I think I scared her (not me, but my stories ).

Am doing better this morning. Got a bit of sleep and some encouragement from that book! Thank you all for being here

Heart, I did anything that would stop the cycling in my head. Exercise is so important because it stimulates and raises the feel good chemicals in our brains, counteracting excess cortisol production which can become a killer. I also played music really loud to drown out my thoughts.

I discovered that all the things addicts are taught to do to keep relapse at bay, apply to us as well. My therapist is an addictionologist and his feedback has been priceless. When we suggest to others to "work the program you wish they would" it's for so many reasons.

Hugs to you and prayers for your serenity :)