The inevitable happened...I got the letter today.
The inevitable happened...I got the letter today.
Finally got the letter from AD I was half expecting now that she's been sitting in jail for a couple of weeks.
She's lost everything and she's completely innocent. Where have I heard that before? Oh yeah, every time she's been in jail!
Then she had the audacity to ask me if I would ask my dad to send her $30-40 on the books, which I am not.
I have not felt well since I got my flu shot last Tuesday and I'm battling the second migraine in 3 days already.
I will write her. It won't be hugs and kisses.
I'm just not going to do it today. I need to try and recuperate for work tomorrow.
She's lost everything and she's completely innocent. Where have I heard that before? Oh yeah, every time she's been in jail!
Then she had the audacity to ask me if I would ask my dad to send her $30-40 on the books, which I am not.
I have not felt well since I got my flu shot last Tuesday and I'm battling the second migraine in 3 days already.
I will write her. It won't be hugs and kisses.
I'm just not going to do it today. I need to try and recuperate for work tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 278
You are doing the Detachment thing....not automatically reacting to what they do or say! Bravo! Take your time and write the letter when you feel like it...and there is another choice...to not write at all. I hope you feel better soon.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 317
Good for you, I know you care deeply for your daughter, but you have been through this before, and you know you need to take care of yourself, get well, and be okay for work.
My AS is always trying to get me to have my relatives send him money, and now I just say, you ask them-- It is not my business.
I hope you feel better, and I am always grateful for your insight.
Hugs
My AS is always trying to get me to have my relatives send him money, and now I just say, you ask them-- It is not my business.
I hope you feel better, and I am always grateful for your insight.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 317
I just wanted to say, also-- That I don't think writing her is a bad thing. it lets you say what you want without the BS of talking and the manipulations. I think that it may ease your mind a little as well, and give you a chance to let her know you love her, but you are going to love her on your terms.
You've had enough to deal with your own health and situation, DeVon, how dare she even ask.
You are doing the right thing by letting her learn that there are consequences, but you already know that.
So I'll just send a bucket of hugs, use them freely.
You are doing the right thing by letting her learn that there are consequences, but you already know that.
So I'll just send a bucket of hugs, use them freely.
It's sad how good we get at predicting what they will do. Almost as predictable as I was in my Gold Medal Winning codependent days.
Take care of you and try to feel better. You'll get around to writing back if and when you feel like it.
gentle hugs
ke
Take care of you and try to feel better. You'll get around to writing back if and when you feel like it.
gentle hugs
ke
Mine is sitting in jail too. Has been for 2 months now.
I don't write back. It just opens the door.
My bottom line is that she must be clean and sober and in a program of recovery for at least a year before she is welcome to contact me.
She is jailhouse sober.....big difference to me.
I don't write back. It just opens the door.
My bottom line is that she must be clean and sober and in a program of recovery for at least a year before she is welcome to contact me.
She is jailhouse sober.....big difference to me.
Dev, I'm so sorry you're not feeling well. They swear that flu shots don't give you the flu, but I think that's a crock. How many times do people have to feel so rotten after getting a shot before it will be a disclaimer on them. I guess for some, getting a flu shot is a way to get the flu out of the way early...beat the Christmas rush so to speak.
Is there any chance you will take that letter of her and line the ferret cage with it? Or maybe just send a card back stating, please reference correspondence dated at your last incarceration. signed, "too busy to repeat old rubbish."
She knows the answer to her little request, why waste your time. You could be using that time more productively, like making Halloween costumes for the pups out of toilet paper.
I hope you feel well soon!
Hugs and vitamin C from me and my fur posse!
Alice
Is there any chance you will take that letter of her and line the ferret cage with it? Or maybe just send a card back stating, please reference correspondence dated at your last incarceration. signed, "too busy to repeat old rubbish."
She knows the answer to her little request, why waste your time. You could be using that time more productively, like making Halloween costumes for the pups out of toilet paper.
I hope you feel well soon!
Hugs and vitamin C from me and my fur posse!
Alice
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