Sad reality/life for him....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 159
Sad reality/life for him....
EXH is out on a crack run again....he called Friday cause he owes me some $ and told me he would be over on Sat. to drop it off...never showed up of course. I went out to get breakfast this morning and he was parked behind McDonald's sleeping in his truck. Went up to the truck and woke him up and asked if he had my $. He didn't..said he only had $8 left for the week. Said he ****** up again...which means he blew his entire check on crack. Said he didn't but I know his raspy voice tells the truth...
He does have a job, is homeless living out of his truck and is on probation....but he won't have that job for long if he keeps this up and the crack use will lead him right back to prison....It's really just a sad life and reality for him right now. I'm not affected but it is disturbing that a man almost 40 years old can't get it together and still smokes crack and is a alcoholic.
I spent 20 years married to him so I know the drill and do not enable it's just disturbing knowing he continues down this path. I pray for him daily and that's pretty much all I can do. I don't even have any pity or worry left for him. I enjoy my peaceful and serene life and will not allow any drama or chaos in my life for any reason. Al-Anon, reading this site, and Co-dependent books have taught me what I was doing wrong and since then have loved myself more. I am just really thankful everyone on here shares like they do because many times I have come here and someone else has posted on exactly how I was feeling...this helps tremendously knowing I'm on the right track.
We have a 16 yr old son who has nothing to do with him...by son's choice...that's sad too but is necessary for our safety.....especially if he's on a run again. Crack addicts are dangerous, unpredictable and scary and I was reminded of this again this morning seeing him laying in his truck cause I knew what he had done even before I woke him up...these are his consequences and he must deal with them. He has no food, cigs, or clean clothes for work next week...my response to that was I'm sorry to hear that. So now that I've got that out I'm going to go complete my essay question for school and enjoy the rest of my Sunday with my family
Any ESH is appreciated
He does have a job, is homeless living out of his truck and is on probation....but he won't have that job for long if he keeps this up and the crack use will lead him right back to prison....It's really just a sad life and reality for him right now. I'm not affected but it is disturbing that a man almost 40 years old can't get it together and still smokes crack and is a alcoholic.
I spent 20 years married to him so I know the drill and do not enable it's just disturbing knowing he continues down this path. I pray for him daily and that's pretty much all I can do. I don't even have any pity or worry left for him. I enjoy my peaceful and serene life and will not allow any drama or chaos in my life for any reason. Al-Anon, reading this site, and Co-dependent books have taught me what I was doing wrong and since then have loved myself more. I am just really thankful everyone on here shares like they do because many times I have come here and someone else has posted on exactly how I was feeling...this helps tremendously knowing I'm on the right track.
We have a 16 yr old son who has nothing to do with him...by son's choice...that's sad too but is necessary for our safety.....especially if he's on a run again. Crack addicts are dangerous, unpredictable and scary and I was reminded of this again this morning seeing him laying in his truck cause I knew what he had done even before I woke him up...these are his consequences and he must deal with them. He has no food, cigs, or clean clothes for work next week...my response to that was I'm sorry to hear that. So now that I've got that out I'm going to go complete my essay question for school and enjoy the rest of my Sunday with my family
Any ESH is appreciated 
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,894
Good for you! Glad you realize you can do nothing for him. You might want to just forget about that money he owes you. Chances are better than good that you'll never see it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
It sounds like a lot of acceptance on your end and peace of mind that comes with it. Yes it's sad that he lives as he does, but that is on him, and not you.
I second the motion that you just forget about what he owes you. We know addicts aren't known for being responsible.
I am so grateful that I found recovery because reading how an active addict is living brings back so many bad memories of my past using days.
Sending you hugs of support.
I second the motion that you just forget about what he owes you. We know addicts aren't known for being responsible.
I am so grateful that I found recovery because reading how an active addict is living brings back so many bad memories of my past using days.
Sending you hugs of support.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Originally Posted by Freedom1990 
It sounds like a lot of acceptance on your end and peace of mind that comes with it.
Take care of you.
gentle hugs
ke
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: California
Posts: 99
I am struggling with acceptance. My 40 yr old husband is addicted to crack as well. I am filing for divorce at the end of the year and it gives me hope that I can find the peace and acceptance you have. We have very limited contact now as he drives me nuts with his manipulative drivel. Its so sad though. .
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
Originally Posted by oneday66
I am struggling with acceptance. My 40 yr old husband is addicted to crack as well. I am filing for divorce at the end of the year and it gives me hope that I can find the peace and acceptance you have. We have very limited contact now as he drives me nuts with his manipulative drivel. Its so sad though. .
I have learned that I can have peace of mind and be reasonably happy in spite of what my AD is/isn't doing.
That alone is worth its weight in gold.
Sending you hugs of support, Oneday!
Putting it all together
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: St. Louis, MO.
Posts: 469
lifegoeson-
You are a woman who really has her **** together.........acceptance is hard and you have learned it the hard way. He is not going to do anything as you said and letting it go is best. I had a former addict husband who committed suicide and I could not do anything........what is there to do.......after the suicide....I heard it was my fault???? NOPE.....his fault. Thank goodness you are a smart woman and can see things for what they really are.
You are a woman who really has her **** together.........acceptance is hard and you have learned it the hard way. He is not going to do anything as you said and letting it go is best. I had a former addict husband who committed suicide and I could not do anything........what is there to do.......after the suicide....I heard it was my fault???? NOPE.....his fault. Thank goodness you are a smart woman and can see things for what they really are.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
