Lovestoomuch

Well...I text my daughter tonight to see how things are going. Apparently she was quite upset as her boyfriend decided to go out and have a few beers. She said she didn't need him out and about during this time...that she needed him there with her, but she's stuck because of my grandson. EXCUSE ME??? Maybe I shouldn't have laid in on her but I lost it.

First of all....the boyfriend is obviously NOT serious about his recovery since all of his friends are on the stuff and he's having beers....REALLY???? This isn't freaking rocket science!! Substituting one substance for another is not recovering!!!

Secondly I told her she need not worry about him. She needs to worry about herself and her own recovery and last but not least I told her NEVER say she's stuck because of her son. She chose to bring him into this world. I told her that most drug addicts....(and yes she's a drug addict)....do not have their children and she'd better thank God everyday she still has her son.

She won't answer her phone. She hasn't text me back. Is this the part where I'm supposed to detach?? I'm afraid the only way I'll sleep tonight is if someone comes and shoots me with an Uzi full of elephant tranquilizers!

I'm so aggravated! She's not a stupid child! God grant me the serenity.....

itisatruth

Guess all I can offer tonight is, keep saying it: "God, grant me the serenity..." Sometimes, people are just not ready to see/hear the truth, but I'm grateful you are there to help her along the way. It'd be great if we could wave that magic wand and make it work out.

Lovestoomuch

Sometimes I think if I had a magic wand I'd hit them upside the head with it........sigh.........repeating the serenity prayer........going to try and get some sleep.

itisatruth

OMG, I so needed to laugh tonight and I really LOL after reading your post..thanks for the "upside the head" comment!! If it were that easy......sigh....


SMACK!!! Was that my wand hitting you.....oops, so sorry.

dollydo

Correct me if I am wrong, wasn't BF using something right after your grandson was born?

Hope that you were able to get some sleep, must have been a full moom last night, I just couldn't turn my mind off, must have to do with dustin the old hummer off!

Freedom1990

I offered my unsolicited advice for years to my AD, stayed immersed in the insanity of her addictions, tried to save my grandchildren, and in the end I was standing at the precipice of giving up my own hard-earned recovery.

Nothing has turned out the way that I had hoped for, despite my best efforts.

When I truly surrendered, and turned her and my grandchildren over to God, I finally found some peace of mind.

I understand what a struggle this is; I truly do.

Ann

It doesn't work that way, Loves, we don't get to direct their recovery or their lives. Regardless of how upset we get or don't get, regardless of what we say or don't say, do or don't do...in the end they do what they want and we can just hope that one day they "want" a better path.

The only person who cannot speak for themselves here is the child, if you think the child is in danger then do what you need to do to keep it safe. Aside from that...we are powerless over addiction..and our lives have become unmanageable. Step 1, the hardest one of all I think because it is surrender.

I see you were up again at 2 am (or maybe you have changed time zones and it wasn't that bad) but sweetie, you will need your sleep if you are going to make it through this.

Big hugs and some cold tea bags for the "late night eye droops".

Kindeyes

I don't think "abuse by magic wand" is anywhere in the 12 step stuff. Perhaps that could be.....

Step 13
If the first 12 steps don't work so good for you, obtain an object of your choice, dub it your "magic wand" and whack 'em with it until they finally see things the way you want them to.

lol! I love the humor on this forum. Twisted sometimes.....but funny.

gentle hugs
ke

(If only you guys could see the words that can sometimes be made by typing errors with the words "gentle hugs"......I should leave it that way sometime so you could enjoy the misspellings as much as I do)

Lovestoomuch

No.....this is someone else. Wyatt's dad left them before he was a year old. He pays his child support and sees him when he can but moved to another county. This new....well I shouldn't say new guy cause they've been together almost 2 years is a real humdinger......sarcastically speaking of course.

Part of my sleeping problem is the fact I don't get out of work till around midnight. It takes so long to unwind and with all of this........ I am trying......I really am.

She just called. Her phone died and she had just gone and went to bed. Wow.....anyone .......feel free to start throwing slippers......Perhaps it's time to start back at step 1.

It's the Indian Rodeo weekend at the Casino so I should be plenty busy tonight and tomorrow. I know it helps to keep busy.

Praying that you all have a blessed day.

dollydo

Ok, got it! Thanks!