Yikes, I'm exhausted
 

Hi everyone,
Well...think we've been home from camp not even a week, and I'm exhausted!

NO...it's not because of the toddler grandson, it's from the AS!

We are now watching grandson 4 days a week, that's okay...most of time he's a joy. But he's 30 months old, so it's iffy...lol)

But, yesterday, I picked up long lost 17 year old grand daughter who is staying 2 nights, which encourages AS to come and see her, (which she wanted) and then subjects her to his "new" alcoholic GF.....then he comes over here, (I nicely made dinner) and he's just SOOOO ungrateful.

Kick me, I cooked dinner two nights in a row, mostly to be nice for grand daughter, but he couldn't even put down his cell phone long enough to play with his son, who by the way, had the worst temper tantrum tonight I have ever seen in my life.

After I asked AS to leave, I finally got grandson sorted out and calmed down and bathed and in pajamas for his mom to pick him up at 9:30.

Grand daughter is leaving tomorrow a.m.
grandson is coming back at 7 p.m. to spend the night...much easier cause I watch him all day Saturday, and never know what his schedule will be.I.E. when he went to bed....friday night. or what time he'll need a nap Saturday.

Yikes, I sure don't want to do this grand daughter/daddy thing again.

Perhaps I will tell grand daughter if she would like to see her dad, it needs to be AWAY from me.....she'll be 18 next month.

He wanted to bring drunk GF again for dinner tonight, (last night she wore her jammies, how nice) but I said NO, and he pitched a fit, but I held my guns.

What a disfunctional mess.
Poor, poor grandson.

THERE....I feel better.

I am sorry Mooselips. poor little fellow. I am glad that he has you to give him stability, in his young years.

wishing you peace

What a circus! You must be exhausted! You know, to the average Joe, this sounds like a really bad sitcom. But for those of us living with addiction and its fallout, this is just another day. I have the utmost respect for grandparents who carry the burden of parenting because the role was vacated by their addict children. Your grandchildren are fortunate to have you in their lives.

It's a shame when a 30 month old baby can behave better than a grown man.

I'm so sorry, Moose, that there has been no peace for you.

Perhaps it's time to take a break from your toxic son, he only brings trouble when he comes and knows nothing of gratitude.

I have had that saying stuck in my head these days, I believe it originated with Oprah but it doesn't matter...but it goes something like... "We are responsible for the energy we bring to any space or situation".

I think this means that I am responsible for my own energy and I can choose peace or I can react in anger when the going gets tough.

To me that can also mean that I don't have to allow anyone's toxicity to live in my space. They can own it someplace else.

I've thought of that a lot lately and found it useful on days when I have caught myself out of sorts.

Love you lots and hope you find peace soon. Keeping you and your family in my prayers.

Big Hugs

Just when I thought I've heard everything..GF comes to dinner in her jammies?

Sorry for the all aggervation, hopefully, today is a better day!

I am so sorry for all the chaos.

What a blessing you are to your sweet grand-babies.

I'm sorry Moose, and I think you have a good idea in telling the GD that she will have to see her dad elsewhere.

I hope things settle for you soon.

I wish I could understand the obsession with cell phones. My STX also does that. It's maddening. Prior to his drug issues hated talking on the phone! It's gross seeing a person neglect their child over a cell phone. Poor little grandson. No wonder he was acting out.

Sorry you had to go through all of that!!! ****{HUGS}}} I agree with the idea of telling the granddaughter. It's not your responsibility to connect them.

I hear you there. Im sorry to hear it. You sound like you're in the exact same situation as my mum.

My addict brother met a trashy alcoholic girlfriend out of rehab, against the sound advice of lets see, EVERYONE around him. Weeks later, he had the nerve to get my father out of bed at 3 AM to pick her up from the police barracks after she was arrested for DUI. Not only is he using again but SHE is too now. They've since stopped enabling. (almost)

I stop doing stuff for ungrateful people ANYWAYS. I would do it 10x quicker if they were an addict. So sorry to hear this. I think you have a good idea. You can't stop them from spending time with one another but you certainly dont need to compromise the peace in your home by making it a venue for chaos.

take care of yourself

Well, I'm going to end the madness as of today, I'm not answering the phone.
I'll just "screen" my calls.

If he wants to see his son, let him call the ex GF.

How pitiful that he doesn't have ANY idea what to feed a 30 month old, or how to SPEAK, or play with his son.

But.if I died tomorrow, somehow I think the world would continue without me.

Drove grand daughter halfway home, this early a.m.(she lives an hour and a half away) to her nice, considerate Step dad, who took her home.

So let's all say AHHHHHHHHhhhhhh.
Until grandson comes tonight to sleep over at 7 p.m.
But I'm sure he'll be just fine today. :)

It's a wonderful thought to eliminate the AS from my life, but SO hard to do.

This is one of the top reasons for loving our Canada cabin.no phone calls, no internet, and LOTS of distance. Plus neither son is allowed across the border. :)

And, Ann, yes, I AM responsible for the energy, I know I am...give me a swift kick, would ya?

hugs to all............

No swift kicks from me, I am better at "suggesting" than I am at taking my own advice sometimes.

I think it's a good thing to cut the calls and visits. It's not like he is even trying to give you any respect...and I know how that feels 'cause I've been there.

You'll be fine, I know you well enough to know you have your "enough" point and I think you just reached it.

Love you lots. Hugs to baby Moose, Mr. Moose and Mama Moose. :grouphug:

Better out than in......glad you got it out!

gentle hugs
ke