Dailies from ODAT
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Dailies from ODAT
I post each day under its own topic over in Friends and Families of Alcoholics, and due to recent developments 
thought I would post them here too, all under this one umbrella/topic "Dailies from ODAT" for anyone who would like to see.
June 30 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
The time I spend in reviewing the past, mourning over past mistakes and failures, is time lost.
This is why the twenty-four hour concept, both in AA and Al-Anon, is so strongly emphasized.
Our yesterdays have no importance except as experience in making today more fruitful. Regrets and self-condemnation for what we did or left undone only destroy the self-esteem we could derive from a balanced view of ourselves.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Regrets for hurtful things I have done to others may be healed by making amends as well as I can. Regrets for missed opportunities will vanish as I try to make wise choices today. Let me fill this one day with thoughts and actions I will have no need to regret. Let me undertake only as much as I can accomplish well, without haste or tension.
“Just for today, I will live through this one day only and not tackle all my problems as once. Those of the past need not concern me today; future ones can be faced as they arise.” (Al-Anon: Just for Today)
thought I would post them here too, all under this one umbrella/topic "Dailies from ODAT" for anyone who would like to see. June 30 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
The time I spend in reviewing the past, mourning over past mistakes and failures, is time lost.
This is why the twenty-four hour concept, both in AA and Al-Anon, is so strongly emphasized.
Our yesterdays have no importance except as experience in making today more fruitful. Regrets and self-condemnation for what we did or left undone only destroy the self-esteem we could derive from a balanced view of ourselves.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Regrets for hurtful things I have done to others may be healed by making amends as well as I can. Regrets for missed opportunities will vanish as I try to make wise choices today. Let me fill this one day with thoughts and actions I will have no need to regret. Let me undertake only as much as I can accomplish well, without haste or tension.
“Just for today, I will live through this one day only and not tackle all my problems as once. Those of the past need not concern me today; future ones can be faced as they arise.” (Al-Anon: Just for Today)
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July 1 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
“This I learned in Al-Anon,” says a member at a meeting, “That the man I married cannot be the source of my happiness or sorrow. The gift of life is personally mine – as his life belongs to him – to enjoy or destroy, as each of us wishes.
“I see him angry. Must I be? He is hostile. Must I be? Am I being faithless to my marriage vows when I achieve a bit of self-confidence while he continues to suffer the pains of self-doubt?
“I am not his guide, master or keeper. We are individuals and must each find our lonely way to our goals. My sources of comfort and strength he refuses to share with me; I have learned through bitter experience that it is fruitless to offer them.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
Adjusting myself to things as they are, and being able to love without trying to interfere with or control anyone else, however close to me – that is what I search for and can find in Al-Anon. The learning is sometimes painful; the reward is life itself – rich, full and serene.
“If thou attend to thyself and to God, thou wilt be little moved by what thou perceivest outside thee.” (Thomas A’Kempis)
“This I learned in Al-Anon,” says a member at a meeting, “That the man I married cannot be the source of my happiness or sorrow. The gift of life is personally mine – as his life belongs to him – to enjoy or destroy, as each of us wishes.
“I see him angry. Must I be? He is hostile. Must I be? Am I being faithless to my marriage vows when I achieve a bit of self-confidence while he continues to suffer the pains of self-doubt?
“I am not his guide, master or keeper. We are individuals and must each find our lonely way to our goals. My sources of comfort and strength he refuses to share with me; I have learned through bitter experience that it is fruitless to offer them.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
Adjusting myself to things as they are, and being able to love without trying to interfere with or control anyone else, however close to me – that is what I search for and can find in Al-Anon. The learning is sometimes painful; the reward is life itself – rich, full and serene.
“If thou attend to thyself and to God, thou wilt be little moved by what thou perceivest outside thee.” (Thomas A’Kempis)
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Thanks for sharing these. I love good readings to begin my day.
I used to live my life as a "reaction" to everyone else's.
How I was depended on how they were.
I learned that I was responsible for my own well-being, for whatever energy I brought with me into any space. Only I held the key to my happiness. And I did not hold the key to theirs, they had to find that themselves.
Just for today I will carry positive energy with me and live my day well and in happiness.
Hugs
I used to live my life as a "reaction" to everyone else's.
How I was depended on how they were.
I learned that I was responsible for my own well-being, for whatever energy I brought with me into any space. Only I held the key to my happiness. And I did not hold the key to theirs, they had to find that themselves.
Just for today I will carry positive energy with me and live my day well and in happiness.
Hugs
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Thanks for sharing. I read daily out of several books to "set" my mind for the day. It works well. I read an abbreviated version of the ODAT June 30th the other day:
If you are standing with one foot in yesterday and the other foot in tomorrow, you are pi$$ing on today.
The mental picture it creates in my mind is very powerful......lol......and helps me stay in today.
gentle hugs
ke
If you are standing with one foot in yesterday and the other foot in tomorrow, you are pi$$ing on today.
The mental picture it creates in my mind is very powerful......lol......and helps me stay in today.
gentle hugs
ke
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July 2 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
Some people I meet in Al-Anon seem to have a kind of natural joy of living. Their optimism tells you they know there’s something good waiting for them right around the corner. Their hopeful confidence rubs off on every troubled person they talk to. They make every meeting a kind of special adventure.
Newer members are astonished to learn that many of these people, when they were new in Al-Anon, were also burdened with woe and black despair. It was Al-Anon that brought the joy of living, hope and confidence out into the open, ready to be used to help others.
TODAY’S REMINDER
As soon as I am willing to dig into the program and put the Twelve Steps and the slogans to work, by daily reading and constant application, I will forget to be “mad” at people, forget to be sorry for myself. And that leaves a gratitude for what is good in every day.
“I’ll only be able to help others when I have allowed Al-Anon to clear up my own view of my problems. Until I am impelled to share with others what I get from this program, my own progress will be limited.”
Some people I meet in Al-Anon seem to have a kind of natural joy of living. Their optimism tells you they know there’s something good waiting for them right around the corner. Their hopeful confidence rubs off on every troubled person they talk to. They make every meeting a kind of special adventure.
Newer members are astonished to learn that many of these people, when they were new in Al-Anon, were also burdened with woe and black despair. It was Al-Anon that brought the joy of living, hope and confidence out into the open, ready to be used to help others.
TODAY’S REMINDER
As soon as I am willing to dig into the program and put the Twelve Steps and the slogans to work, by daily reading and constant application, I will forget to be “mad” at people, forget to be sorry for myself. And that leaves a gratitude for what is good in every day.
“I’ll only be able to help others when I have allowed Al-Anon to clear up my own view of my problems. Until I am impelled to share with others what I get from this program, my own progress will be limited.”
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July 3 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
Someone once said, “The only difference between stumbling blocks and stepping stones is in how you use them.”
It’s a comforting thought that nobody can put stumbling blocks in my way, because I’m learning how to use them to step on as I progress to a saner way of living.
There’s no discounting the troubles caused by alcoholism – they’re big and terrifying. But I CAN refuse to let them block my path. I can imagine that each is one of the Twelve Steps. At least I have god’s gift of sobriety to help me, unlike the sick alcoholic who is tripped up again and again by a built-in stumbling block.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Obstacles cannot keep me from finding the good in my life and following where it leads. Nothing can get in the way of this – unless I allow it.
Al-Anon invites me to take this action: to change my view of myself and the world I am creating around me.
“…men may rise on stepping-stones
Of their dead selves to higher things.”
(Tennyson: IN MEMORIAM)
Someone once said, “The only difference between stumbling blocks and stepping stones is in how you use them.”
It’s a comforting thought that nobody can put stumbling blocks in my way, because I’m learning how to use them to step on as I progress to a saner way of living.
There’s no discounting the troubles caused by alcoholism – they’re big and terrifying. But I CAN refuse to let them block my path. I can imagine that each is one of the Twelve Steps. At least I have god’s gift of sobriety to help me, unlike the sick alcoholic who is tripped up again and again by a built-in stumbling block.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Obstacles cannot keep me from finding the good in my life and following where it leads. Nothing can get in the way of this – unless I allow it.
Al-Anon invites me to take this action: to change my view of myself and the world I am creating around me.
“…men may rise on stepping-stones
Of their dead selves to higher things.”
(Tennyson: IN MEMORIAM)
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July 4 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
The poet Henley, in his challenging poem called INVICTUS says, “I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul.”
The first thing I notice is that he speaks of “my fate,” “my soul.” If I have been behaving as though I were captain and master of anyone else, wouldn’t it be a good idea to turn my attention to managing myself?
I must also recognize, however, that my fate, and the state of my soul, doesn’t depend on me alone; I need the help of God to meet life’s challenges. No human wisdom is adequate to make life wholly satisfying and successful.
TODAY’S REMINDER
God will take a hand in my life if I ask for His guidance and keep myself receptive to indications of His will for me. Before Al-Anon, I took too much on myself in trying to engineer solutions. Now, I know I can only make right decisions by referring my problems to Him. God must be part of my life; I will “acknowledge Him in all my ways.” Then it will be possible to rise above my difficulties.
“God dwells wherever man lets Him in.” – Martin Buber
The poet Henley, in his challenging poem called INVICTUS says, “I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul.”
The first thing I notice is that he speaks of “my fate,” “my soul.” If I have been behaving as though I were captain and master of anyone else, wouldn’t it be a good idea to turn my attention to managing myself?
I must also recognize, however, that my fate, and the state of my soul, doesn’t depend on me alone; I need the help of God to meet life’s challenges. No human wisdom is adequate to make life wholly satisfying and successful.
TODAY’S REMINDER
God will take a hand in my life if I ask for His guidance and keep myself receptive to indications of His will for me. Before Al-Anon, I took too much on myself in trying to engineer solutions. Now, I know I can only make right decisions by referring my problems to Him. God must be part of my life; I will “acknowledge Him in all my ways.” Then it will be possible to rise above my difficulties.
“God dwells wherever man lets Him in.” – Martin Buber
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July 5 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
An AA speaker at an Al-Anon meeting gave the members this unusual insight from the other side of the fence:
“The non-alcoholic in the family doesn’t seem to realize that the alcoholic is in a terribly vulnerable position. He must be constantly on guard, because he knows, deep down inside, how much trouble he is bringing to the family. He knows he is wide open to criticism.
“But did it ever occur to you that your tantrums and the harsh words are like whipping a sick dog? Remember he’s lashing himself – all the time. If you apply more lashes, you’re inviting him to transfer some of his guilt to you. This can keep him from reaching his ‘bottom,’ and realizing how much he needs help to find sobriety.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will try to understand how desperately the alcoholic suffers from guilt. I will not yield to the impulse to kick him when he is down. We both suffer in different ways from the alcoholism. I, who have God’s gift of sobriety, must be the one to realize his dissatisfaction with himself, no matter how defiant and defensive he may appear.
“If I were unfortunate enough to be an alcoholic, how would I hope to be treated by the person I live with? The Golden Rule is a useful tool in all our personal relationships.”
An AA speaker at an Al-Anon meeting gave the members this unusual insight from the other side of the fence:
“The non-alcoholic in the family doesn’t seem to realize that the alcoholic is in a terribly vulnerable position. He must be constantly on guard, because he knows, deep down inside, how much trouble he is bringing to the family. He knows he is wide open to criticism.
“But did it ever occur to you that your tantrums and the harsh words are like whipping a sick dog? Remember he’s lashing himself – all the time. If you apply more lashes, you’re inviting him to transfer some of his guilt to you. This can keep him from reaching his ‘bottom,’ and realizing how much he needs help to find sobriety.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will try to understand how desperately the alcoholic suffers from guilt. I will not yield to the impulse to kick him when he is down. We both suffer in different ways from the alcoholism. I, who have God’s gift of sobriety, must be the one to realize his dissatisfaction with himself, no matter how defiant and defensive he may appear.
“If I were unfortunate enough to be an alcoholic, how would I hope to be treated by the person I live with? The Golden Rule is a useful tool in all our personal relationships.”
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July 6 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
The change from active alcoholism to sobriety makes a great upheaval in our lives. It is a challenge to both partners. Making this difficult adjustment requires entirely new thinking patterns.
In the years of active drinking, the husbands of compulsive drinkers had to take on many extra responsibilities. Along with earning a living for the family, they had to provide for the care of the children, take care of the home and get the meals. Wives of compulsive drinkers often had to work to supplement the skimpy budget or do without many necessities, as well as doing the man’s chores around the house.
With sobriety, many of these roles must be reversed: many habits unlearned. The Al-Anon program, applied each day, will help us make the adjustments to a normal way of life.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will learn not to expect too much too soon, and above all, not to expect that sobriety will transform my spouse into a super-perfect human being, tailored to my specifications.
Al-Anon will help to restore me to a sane and reasonable way of thinking so I can deal with my family relationships with love and understanding.
“No great improvements are possible in the lot of mankind until a change takes place in their modes of thought.”
The change from active alcoholism to sobriety makes a great upheaval in our lives. It is a challenge to both partners. Making this difficult adjustment requires entirely new thinking patterns.
In the years of active drinking, the husbands of compulsive drinkers had to take on many extra responsibilities. Along with earning a living for the family, they had to provide for the care of the children, take care of the home and get the meals. Wives of compulsive drinkers often had to work to supplement the skimpy budget or do without many necessities, as well as doing the man’s chores around the house.
With sobriety, many of these roles must be reversed: many habits unlearned. The Al-Anon program, applied each day, will help us make the adjustments to a normal way of life.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will learn not to expect too much too soon, and above all, not to expect that sobriety will transform my spouse into a super-perfect human being, tailored to my specifications.
Al-Anon will help to restore me to a sane and reasonable way of thinking so I can deal with my family relationships with love and understanding.
“No great improvements are possible in the lot of mankind until a change takes place in their modes of thought.”
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July 7 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
It is an interesting experiment, and an enlightening one, to listen to the voices at an Al-Anon meeting – not so much what they’re saying, but how. The very sound and inflection can reveal the speaker’s hidden attitudes.
What does the discerning listener hear in such an experiment?
In those who are studying the program and enjoying the fruits of living it, the tone and manner of speaking show confidence, humility, compassion for those in trouble, and an honest acknowledgment that they are not masterminds to solve all problems.
In those who are still bound to their unhappiness, we hear, beyond their words, angry judgments of the alcoholic, self-pity, and a grim determination to “win the battle,” no matter what.
TODAY’S REMINDER
The way I speak often reveals more than what I say. To make the program work for me, it is important to be living it. This will reveal itself in everything I do and say.
“By listening to more than mere words, I can learn much more than mere words can teach.”
It is an interesting experiment, and an enlightening one, to listen to the voices at an Al-Anon meeting – not so much what they’re saying, but how. The very sound and inflection can reveal the speaker’s hidden attitudes.
What does the discerning listener hear in such an experiment?
In those who are studying the program and enjoying the fruits of living it, the tone and manner of speaking show confidence, humility, compassion for those in trouble, and an honest acknowledgment that they are not masterminds to solve all problems.
In those who are still bound to their unhappiness, we hear, beyond their words, angry judgments of the alcoholic, self-pity, and a grim determination to “win the battle,” no matter what.
TODAY’S REMINDER
The way I speak often reveals more than what I say. To make the program work for me, it is important to be living it. This will reveal itself in everything I do and say.
“By listening to more than mere words, I can learn much more than mere words can teach.”
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Hi Friends and Families! - Got my ODAT's mixed up. Today's was actually yesterday's, and yesterday's was actually today's. This is actually July 7th's ODAT but I'm dating it today. Since I believe this is probably a Divine Intervention...!!! who knows at this time why the dates got mixed in my head
July 8 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
What’s so important about being right? Why do we complicate our lives and aggravate our difficulties by insisting our views be accepted?
In the tensions that are part of living with an alcoholic, this attitude can make much trouble for us. What harm would it do to “back down” – to accept what the alcoholic says, whether it makes sense or not? Why don’t I just Let Go and Let God?
I will try to apply “Easy Does It” to every incident that might increase the tension and cause an explosion. I will try to realize that an exchange of hostile words will not help me to find the serenity I want.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Why should I react to criticism and accusation, justified or not? What can I gain by heated denials and irrational discussions? In a neurotic environment, anything can start a row. I need not take part in it; I will ignore it – cheerfully if I can. This is an excellent technique for avoiding dissention. Our calm unconcern may make the alcoholic uneasy enough to make him think seriously about finding sobriety.
“To withdraw from an argument may not make you the winner, but what you have saved is your own dignity and grace.”
July 8 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
What’s so important about being right? Why do we complicate our lives and aggravate our difficulties by insisting our views be accepted?
In the tensions that are part of living with an alcoholic, this attitude can make much trouble for us. What harm would it do to “back down” – to accept what the alcoholic says, whether it makes sense or not? Why don’t I just Let Go and Let God?
I will try to apply “Easy Does It” to every incident that might increase the tension and cause an explosion. I will try to realize that an exchange of hostile words will not help me to find the serenity I want.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Why should I react to criticism and accusation, justified or not? What can I gain by heated denials and irrational discussions? In a neurotic environment, anything can start a row. I need not take part in it; I will ignore it – cheerfully if I can. This is an excellent technique for avoiding dissention. Our calm unconcern may make the alcoholic uneasy enough to make him think seriously about finding sobriety.
“To withdraw from an argument may not make you the winner, but what you have saved is your own dignity and grace.”
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Had a doozy with my AH on Wednesday. It's been a VERY long time since this happened in this way. He was so intent on being right and proving his point that he wouldn't stop coming at me, even though I realized this argument was not going to be "a winner" for either of us. I attempted to disengage a few times but he kept on coming.
I ended up telling him to get away from me and going for a walk. He'd basically been "pinning me down" (not actually touching me, but physical body language was that of "cornering" me and he positioned himself so he was coming down on me).
I'm still not at peace with the situation - it's right at the border of being a deal breaker for me. I'm absolutely keeping my space and checking myself frequently for not letting my ill-at-ease-ness influence me to be passive aggressive - in short, I'm practicing Al Anon to the best of my ability, even though my peace in the situation is not fully here yet.
I ended up telling him to get away from me and going for a walk. He'd basically been "pinning me down" (not actually touching me, but physical body language was that of "cornering" me and he positioned himself so he was coming down on me).
I'm still not at peace with the situation - it's right at the border of being a deal breaker for me. I'm absolutely keeping my space and checking myself frequently for not letting my ill-at-ease-ness influence me to be passive aggressive - in short, I'm practicing Al Anon to the best of my ability, even though my peace in the situation is not fully here yet.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I need my space too, Meredith. Crowding and loud voices are very intimidating and I no longer tolerate either.
I used to see all arguments as a battle of who's right and who's wrong. Sometimes that is still true...but most times it is simply a difference of opinion.
Today I respect the right of anyone to have an opinion that differs from mine...no matter how "wrong" they are
Sorry, couldn't resist. But acceptance of differing opinions can bring a lot more peace than forever trying to change anyone's point of view.
Thanks for sharing these, they really help remind me to practice what I preach.
Hugs
I used to see all arguments as a battle of who's right and who's wrong. Sometimes that is still true...but most times it is simply a difference of opinion.
Today I respect the right of anyone to have an opinion that differs from mine...no matter how "wrong" they are
Sorry, couldn't resist. But acceptance of differing opinions can bring a lot more peace than forever trying to change anyone's point of view.
Thanks for sharing these, they really help remind me to practice what I preach.
Hugs
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Originally Posted by Ann 
I need my space too, Meredith. Crowding and loud voices are very intimidating and I no longer tolerate either.
I used to see all arguments as a battle of who's right and who's wrong. Sometimes that is still true...but most times it is simply a difference of opinion.
Today I respect the right of anyone to have an opinion that differs from mine...no matter how "wrong" they are
Sorry, couldn't resist. But acceptance of differing opinions can bring a lot more peace than forever trying to change anyone's point of view.
Thanks for sharing these, they really help remind me to practice what I preach.
Hugs
I used to see all arguments as a battle of who's right and who's wrong. Sometimes that is still true...but most times it is simply a difference of opinion.
Today I respect the right of anyone to have an opinion that differs from mine...no matter how "wrong" they are
Sorry, couldn't resist. But acceptance of differing opinions can bring a lot more peace than forever trying to change anyone's point of view.
Thanks for sharing these, they really help remind me to practice what I preach.
Hugs
...and sometimes a person just needs to leave the room.
The "poison argument" was NOT worth the fight, for sure. I knew I wasn't going to change his mind and I didn't even try. He got on an aggressive thread and just wanted his "piece" of me. Leaving was the best I could do. The walk did me good.I'm glad you can get something from the ODAT's. I know that typing them makes me really look at them, and that's a gift to me, too!
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July 9 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
What kind of stuff is self-pity made of, that it can entrench itself in my mind and keep me miserable? It may be envy of those who have more of the material things – better house, a finer car. It could be any resentment of monotony, not having enough relief from the daily grind. It may be because I am critical of others: “Why can’t he do it my way; why did she say or do this or that?” Or bitterness because we’re lonely if the spouse has merely switched from nightly sessions at a bar to nightly AA meetings.
Self-pity comes from concentrating on the negative aspects of life.
I will find ways to make my life more interesting, take a fresh view of the pleasant things that happen each day. I will work toward a more mature attitude – and settle for a little less than my romantic dreams make me think I ought to have.
TODAY’S REMINDER
An Al-Anon meeting is a great place to observe how various people react to their circumstances. Those who have the most to be grateful for often grumble and complain. Others, living desperate and even tragic lives, somehow keep cheerful and manage to get some joy out of what little they do have.
“To expect life to be tailored to our specifications is to invite frustration.”
What kind of stuff is self-pity made of, that it can entrench itself in my mind and keep me miserable? It may be envy of those who have more of the material things – better house, a finer car. It could be any resentment of monotony, not having enough relief from the daily grind. It may be because I am critical of others: “Why can’t he do it my way; why did she say or do this or that?” Or bitterness because we’re lonely if the spouse has merely switched from nightly sessions at a bar to nightly AA meetings.
Self-pity comes from concentrating on the negative aspects of life.
I will find ways to make my life more interesting, take a fresh view of the pleasant things that happen each day. I will work toward a more mature attitude – and settle for a little less than my romantic dreams make me think I ought to have.
TODAY’S REMINDER
An Al-Anon meeting is a great place to observe how various people react to their circumstances. Those who have the most to be grateful for often grumble and complain. Others, living desperate and even tragic lives, somehow keep cheerful and manage to get some joy out of what little they do have.
“To expect life to be tailored to our specifications is to invite frustration.”
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July 10 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
When I am much troubled, I often find that the counsel of the cheerful optimist only makes my exasperation worse! I feel my sufferings aren’t properly understood – people can’t even begin to appreciate what a martyr I am! I think to myself: “it’s easy enough to talk, but how can I smile when there’s nothing to be happy about?”
Oddly enough, I have found that a deliberate effort to ”laugh it off” does have the most astonishing results in shrinking my woes down to bearable size.
This is the helpful hint embodied in our ”Just for Today” leaflet:
TODAY’S REMINDER
“Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said: ‘Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.’
“Nobody’s life is ALL dark and cloudy. Let’s look for the brighter and happier things in it. This often helps to make the clouds disappear.”
“Dwelling on our troubles only makes them hurt more. I’ll just make myself look on the cheerful side.”
When I am much troubled, I often find that the counsel of the cheerful optimist only makes my exasperation worse! I feel my sufferings aren’t properly understood – people can’t even begin to appreciate what a martyr I am! I think to myself: “it’s easy enough to talk, but how can I smile when there’s nothing to be happy about?”
Oddly enough, I have found that a deliberate effort to ”laugh it off” does have the most astonishing results in shrinking my woes down to bearable size.
This is the helpful hint embodied in our ”Just for Today” leaflet:
TODAY’S REMINDER
“Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said: ‘Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.’
“Nobody’s life is ALL dark and cloudy. Let’s look for the brighter and happier things in it. This often helps to make the clouds disappear.”
“Dwelling on our troubles only makes them hurt more. I’ll just make myself look on the cheerful side.”
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Meredith
Thanks for posting these. There are many people on this forum who don't have access to the literature from Alanon (or Naranon). This is a great way for them to catch a bit of it.
gentle hugs
ke
Thanks for posting these. There are many people on this forum who don't have access to the literature from Alanon (or Naranon). This is a great way for them to catch a bit of it.
gentle hugs
ke
Present
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,360
********{Kindeyes}}}}}July 11 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
“What if…” How often we hear these words from those who live with an alcoholic problem. Only two little words, but they’re heavy with dread, fear and anxiety.
“What if he doesn’t come home?” – “What if she doesn’t take care of the children while I’m at work?” – “What if he spends all his pay on liquor?” – What if…anything our desperate imaginings can project.
Granted these things can happen, but when they don’t, we have put ourselves through needless suffering and made ourselves even less prepared to deal with them if they should come.
TODAY’S REMINDER
In Al-Anon, the answer to “What if…” is “Don’t project! Don’t imagine the worst; deal with your problems as they arise. Live one day at a time.”
I cannot do anything about things that haven’t happened; I will not let past experiences make me dread the unknown future.
“It is a vain and unprofitable thing to conceive either grief or joy for future things which perhaps will never come about.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,360
July 12 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
It is not mere chance that brought me to Al-Anon. I was led to it by an unknown power because of my need for the sharing and comfort of others like me. To express my gratitude for this gift, I will assume certain responsibilities:
- To study and use the Al-Anon ideas, not only for myself, but for the benefit of my friends in the group.
- To be concerned about their difficulties and to try to help them solve their problems spiritually.
- Not to take up the group’s time talking about my problems, but to try to make everything I say reflect an Al-Anon teaching, which will have meaning for those who hear me.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Attending a good Al-Anon meeting is a satisfying experience. Its purpose is far more than just “an evening out.” I will prepare myself for these meetings by reading Al-Anon literature so I can pass on something of value. The net result of such full participation will be a better way of life for me.
“We cannot drop out of human involvement without endangering our spiritual health.”
It is not mere chance that brought me to Al-Anon. I was led to it by an unknown power because of my need for the sharing and comfort of others like me. To express my gratitude for this gift, I will assume certain responsibilities:
- To study and use the Al-Anon ideas, not only for myself, but for the benefit of my friends in the group.
- To be concerned about their difficulties and to try to help them solve their problems spiritually.
- Not to take up the group’s time talking about my problems, but to try to make everything I say reflect an Al-Anon teaching, which will have meaning for those who hear me.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Attending a good Al-Anon meeting is a satisfying experience. Its purpose is far more than just “an evening out.” I will prepare myself for these meetings by reading Al-Anon literature so I can pass on something of value. The net result of such full participation will be a better way of life for me.
“We cannot drop out of human involvement without endangering our spiritual health.”
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