update
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: buffalo ny
Posts: 167
update
hi, for those who don't know me, my AH was incarcerated a month ago for stealing to get crack. He relapsed 6 months ago after 3 years clean. It's been a rough month but I am feeling a little better each day. I have made some changes so I can afford my bills, started exercising and eating better. Summer is hard though, and I am still having trouble believing that my husband left me for crack. Traded in his freedom for crack. Then I remember that I don't have to understand it, because I AM DONE!!!!
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Sometimes the gifts in life come strangely wrapped. As hard as this must be for you right now, perhaps it was the last straw, the final move that gave you the courage to move on.
My last straw was a bad night at a crack house trying to rescue my son, to no avail.
It's times like this where we realize that we can choose to live in the darkness of their addiction, or the light of our own recovery. I'm grateful to have had those who went before me to shine their light while I found mine.
We're walking beside you, sharing our light too. It will get better, it always does. But first comes the grief.
Hugs
My last straw was a bad night at a crack house trying to rescue my son, to no avail.
It's times like this where we realize that we can choose to live in the darkness of their addiction, or the light of our own recovery. I'm grateful to have had those who went before me to shine their light while I found mine.
We're walking beside you, sharing our light too. It will get better, it always does. But first comes the grief.
Hugs
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
I found the further away I got from being in the front row watching addiction, the better I felt. Sounds like you are doing all the things you need to do to find the better way. We are walking with you 
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 34
Barblsn:
I am so sorry you are going through this. I recently found out that my ex-boyfriend is an alochol and cocaine addict. It hurts so bad. I commend you on your strength and taking care of you to move on. Better things and mates are in store for both of us!!!
Hugs,
I am so sorry you are going through this. I recently found out that my ex-boyfriend is an alochol and cocaine addict. It hurts so bad. I commend you on your strength and taking care of you to move on. Better things and mates are in store for both of us!!!
Hugs,
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: buffalo ny
Posts: 167
6 months later
My husband got out of prison this week. The divorce is proceeding. I met a very nice man and we are getting along great. My husband cannot beleive I am not taking him back. Really? Does he think that little of me that he expects me to go through all this pain AGAIN?
He is going back into rehab, the same place that he failed last time. Unfortunately that rehab is walking distance from my house, but he knows I am seeing someone, so won't just pop over.
I am taking care of me.
He is going back into rehab, the same place that he failed last time. Unfortunately that rehab is walking distance from my house, but he knows I am seeing someone, so won't just pop over.
I am taking care of me.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 951
It's awesome that you are moving on and taking care of yourself!
Is he going into rehab of his own avail, or is he being compelled?
And is your home one that he previously shared, ie; will he feel justified in coming there?
Is he going into rehab of his own avail, or is he being compelled?
And is your home one that he previously shared, ie; will he feel justified in coming there?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: buffalo ny
Posts: 167
It's awesome that you are moving on and taking care of yourself!
Is he going into rehab of his own avail, or is he being compelled?
And is your home one that he previously shared, ie; will he feel justified in coming there?
first, thank you. When he relapsed last november I vowed that I would not allow him to bring me down with him as he had in the past.
He is on Parole, and mandated to rehab. Basically, he is homeless. He no longer lives with me, and his family will not help him. He has been back to the house we shared to get his clothes, saw my new boyfriend sitting on the couch watching tv, and had to leave. Of course my concern is when he relapses (and I have little hope that he won't). When he uses cocaine, he turns into the devil. But I will contact his PO if that happens, and AH will go back to prison.
Is he going into rehab of his own avail, or is he being compelled?
And is your home one that he previously shared, ie; will he feel justified in coming there?
first, thank you. When he relapsed last november I vowed that I would not allow him to bring me down with him as he had in the past.
He is on Parole, and mandated to rehab. Basically, he is homeless. He no longer lives with me, and his family will not help him. He has been back to the house we shared to get his clothes, saw my new boyfriend sitting on the couch watching tv, and had to leave. Of course my concern is when he relapses (and I have little hope that he won't). When he uses cocaine, he turns into the devil. But I will contact his PO if that happens, and AH will go back to prison.
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