Sleep
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Location: KY
Posts: 62
Sleep
As I posted yesterday, I dropped my boyfriend off at a detox program after a long battle with heroin. For the past few months as he spiraled deeper into his addiction I lost the ability to sleep. Constantly worried about him, when this was going to end, trying not to move in bed and wake him because if he woke up he would use/begin the hunt again for drugs, and even some nights staying up all night with my hand on his chest to ensure he continued breathing.
He called me earlier to tell me he was glad he finally decided to get help and wants to do it right and apoligized for everything lately and his plan was to make it right. The conversation was only 1 minute long, but it was the most heartfelt conversation I have had with him in the past 3 months.
And what do you know.....when I got home from class I FELL ASLEEP on the couch!!! And I'm talking actual rest for more than 30 minute intervals....
I've taken him to detox/rehab and I know this is only the beginning of a lifelong struggle he has ahead of him, but ths time feels different for ME. I feel like a weight is lifted, I am not worried at all times, and i feel optimistic.
He called me earlier to tell me he was glad he finally decided to get help and wants to do it right and apoligized for everything lately and his plan was to make it right. The conversation was only 1 minute long, but it was the most heartfelt conversation I have had with him in the past 3 months.
And what do you know.....when I got home from class I FELL ASLEEP on the couch!!! And I'm talking actual rest for more than 30 minute intervals....
I've taken him to detox/rehab and I know this is only the beginning of a lifelong struggle he has ahead of him, but ths time feels different for ME. I feel like a weight is lifted, I am not worried at all times, and i feel optimistic.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
Hopefully what is different this time is that you are detaching yourself from his addiction problems so that you can deal with your co-dependent own problems. It's not good to let someone else have so much room in your head that you can't accomplish normal functions like sleeping or eating. The good news is that you can fix this! A strong program of recovery for yourself by working with a counselor or attending Al-anon or Nar-anon can help with this.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Location: KY
Posts: 62
I do think that the difference this time is the way that I am handling it. Times before when I dropped him off I was sad, missing him and ready for him to come home. But this time I felt relieved and excited about him actually going there. I am not sad, but happy about his plan for halfway house for the next 6 months.
I agree with you that it also has to do with me detaching from his addiction. As it has only been 2 days I haven't really begun working my program but I think coming here was a great 1st step in the right direction, and I'm excited about actually focusing on myself!
I agree with you that it also has to do with me detaching from his addiction. As it has only been 2 days I haven't really begun working my program but I think coming here was a great 1st step in the right direction, and I'm excited about actually focusing on myself!
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