Such a predictable pattern
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 25
Such a predictable pattern
Well...I've been separated from my bf of ten years (who has an AD) for 3 weeks now. No contact whatsoever...until he called me this past Tuesday. I didn't answer the phone. He didn't leave a message. Since then, my phone has been turned off every evening and he hasn't left a message.
I think I know why he was calling. I checked his daughter's facebook page. I like to keep tabs of where she's working (on the rare occasion she has a job) so I can avoid her. She usually gets waitressing jobs or cashier jobs. I DO NOT want her as my waitress.
Well, anyway...she's only been back home with her enabling father for a month, if that, and already the drama has hit the fan and she posted that she has to move out.
This is the 4th time in less than a year he's kicked her out. Within 6 weeks, she'll call him crying, swearing (again) that THIS TIME she's serious about wanting to get her act together and go to college. She'll tell him everything he wants to hear. He'll get that starry-eyed look again and be oh so eager to "help" her again.
I can't go through this again. I know he'll want to see me again and say, "This time I've REALLY seen the light...I know what she is...I've learned my lesson....I'm finished with her!"
No.
All I can say to him at this point is that he is as much of an addict as she is and suggest he go to narc-anon and speak with other parents. I wish him luck.
I think I know why he was calling. I checked his daughter's facebook page. I like to keep tabs of where she's working (on the rare occasion she has a job) so I can avoid her. She usually gets waitressing jobs or cashier jobs. I DO NOT want her as my waitress.
Well, anyway...she's only been back home with her enabling father for a month, if that, and already the drama has hit the fan and she posted that she has to move out.
This is the 4th time in less than a year he's kicked her out. Within 6 weeks, she'll call him crying, swearing (again) that THIS TIME she's serious about wanting to get her act together and go to college. She'll tell him everything he wants to hear. He'll get that starry-eyed look again and be oh so eager to "help" her again.
I can't go through this again. I know he'll want to see me again and say, "This time I've REALLY seen the light...I know what she is...I've learned my lesson....I'm finished with her!"
No.
All I can say to him at this point is that he is as much of an addict as she is and suggest he go to narc-anon and speak with other parents. I wish him luck.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 25
Thanks...reading on this forum is what helped.
I also got a great book called "The Secret Things of God". MY higher power wants me to have a better life than the one I had. I'm heading down that path now, instead of the one I was stuck on that was going nowhere.
I also got a great book called "The Secret Things of God". MY higher power wants me to have a better life than the one I had. I'm heading down that path now, instead of the one I was stuck on that was going nowhere.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 25
Well...I found out why my exbf's AD has moved out. He texted me (since I wouldn't pick up his phone calls) and told me that AD stole and forged 11 checks from him. He said the police are charging her with theft and forgery. He said he kicked her out, that I was right about everything and that he was so stupid.
The sad part is...he will most likely drop the charges, and she'll be back living with him within six weeks, and it will be the exact same words being said.
SO GLAD I was out of the picture when this happened. The first words out of her mouth would have been, "It was Dusty who forged your checks...I saw her with the checkbook!!!" and he would have believed her.
The sad part is...he will most likely drop the charges, and she'll be back living with him within six weeks, and it will be the exact same words being said.
SO GLAD I was out of the picture when this happened. The first words out of her mouth would have been, "It was Dusty who forged your checks...I saw her with the checkbook!!!" and he would have believed her.
SO GLAD I was out of the picture when this happened. - Yes ma'am...you can no longer be the scapegoat for their dysfunctional relationship. Good for you moving on...you're right, you deserve sooooo much more than the pain and anguish you've been living with these many years!
I wish you nothing but blue skies from now on....!!!!
I wish you nothing but blue skies from now on....!!!!
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