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Hi everyone,

My boyfriend decided to completely sober up and kick his weed/alcohol habit on New Years Day although he has been clean from opiates from about a year and a half now...

The reason why I'm posting here is become I'm completely lost.

I love this boy so much, I honestly do - things are so hard and I just don't know how to get over it.

Ever since he became stone cold sober, he's been really in his head...even more introverted than before...Don't get me wrong, I'm ecstatic that he's finally putting in the hard yards for his health, but I can't seem to shake the feeling of emptiness that I have.

I know that he needs more time and space to himself now, and I respect that and I feel soo selfish for feeling like I need more from him.

What I want to know is...can it really work out? being in a relationship with an addict, even if it is one in recovery?

I don't want to feel as if I'm wasting my time, because honestly...this boy is the only one that has ever made my heart jump like this...

CaliSoca

I recently had to separate myself from my situation with my boyfriend (now ex). Check out my thread in this forum.....
I've learned that you have to do what is best for you. And giving him space is good for the both of you. There's probably a lot of underlying issues (mental) that he has to deal with it. When I was having mental health problems a couple years ago, I didn't want to be around anyone. All I wanted to do was focus on getting better.

However, I believe there is no way you can have a healthy relationship with an active addict. Recovering, non active...yes. I think that is something that can be done, if there's counseling involved.

I'm not an expert in this area though. This is the first time Ive ever had to deal with addiction.

Good luck to you..and hang in there!

Ainslie

Sounds like your man has made some epic progress there.

I would be inclined to take as much time out for yourself as he does for himself, whilst letting him know that you love him and will still support him in anyway you can.

Heres another thread that may be of interest to you:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ink-about.html

semihollow

^ thanks Ainslie, I really needed to read that today.

Ainslie

No worries, look after yourself