I always see to get what I need

Old 03-24-2011, 10:35 AM
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Living in a Pinkful Place
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I always see to get what I need

As most of you know we are now raising our granddaughter ~ which is a blessing ~ She has been with us full time for about 6 weeks . . .

BUT a six year old, working 2 jobs, (one of which I have over an hour commute one way) and keeping up a household - is a busy busy life.

A typical day starts out at 3:45 am, up & at 'em, make the coffee, get dressed, make-up, etc.; wake up K , Mr. Pink Acres takes over supervising her getting dressed, breakfast, etc, & dropping her off to his oldest son's house for her to get to school, I leave the house by 4:40 am to get to work for 6 am,

work 10 hr day ~ drive an hour, pick up K, get home usually by 6:15, fix supper, do homework, try to wash a load of clothes, clean up the kitchen,

Mr. PINK Acres & K take care of her nitely reading while I get her clothes out for school the next morning, fix lunches for us, get my clothes ready for work,

Get her showered, then I take mine & try to get her to bed for 8:30 ish -

Then try to get myself to bed at least by 10 ~ and start all over again at 3:45 then next morning

Now of course it's Tax Season - so throw in a Fri & Sat working along with those 4 10 hr days & you can imagine how exhausted I am!

As I sat today at work - I thought I love this little girl so much - but oh my how am I going to do this - I am so exhausted I am not even thinking straight. . .

How are we ever going to be able to do this?
I prayed this morning
"Dear God - please am I doing enough, is this the right thing? She is just as tired as we are!!! Are we really making it better? Is this really helping?"

AND GOD ANSWERED!

He prompted Jason to post ~ I remembered reading his post about the life he and Kirby lived through; about how they have struggled and overcame . . .
and then I REMEMBERED. . .

God provided Mr. Pink & I a way to protect K from what Jason & Kirby went through ~ She can still interact with her Dad but under healthy circumstances. She has the pain of the lost of her Mom which will be 2 yrs ago on Saturday - but she doesn't have to live with the active disease 24/7 ~ she will recover from the loss of a few hours sleep & SO WILL I!!!

So, we will be tired, the beds will be unmade, the house will look a little messy and maybe we will have another corndog with easymac for supper instead of a healthy 4 or 5 course meal ~ but we will be safe, we will be clean, we will get MOST of the homework done and we will be LOVED!!

Did I ever mention that I have the best life ever - I have HUGE circles under my eyes & no make-up now that I have cried it all off today ?

But thanks again Jason for reminder of why we are doing what we are doing -

Because NO child should have to live in a house with active addiction/alcoholism ~ it slowly kills their self-esteem, self-worth & self-love - I remember I lived in that house!

I LOVE SR ~ so Grateful that my HP uses it to give me exactly what I need!

PINK HUGS to all from messy but full of Love - PINK Acres!
Rita
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Old 03-24-2011, 11:10 AM
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(((Rita))) - I'm glad that (((Jay's))) good news, which was an answer to MY prayers, is also an answer to your prayers.

I know you're tired, but tax season doesn't last forever, and you will be able to have a better schedule once it's done (just a few more weeks, sweetie). Yes, you ARE giving little ((Miss Kaleigh)) a life she deserves, and preventing her from going through what ((Jay)) and ((Kirby)) have been through.

You can't change that her mom died, or that her dad is an A, but you CAN give her all the love, support, discipline, and experience you have from what you've been through. I can't think of a more perfect fit

Love, hugs, and prayers,

Amy
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Old 03-24-2011, 11:40 AM
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It's an adjustment right now and I'm glad Jason helped you put it into perspective. It WILL ease up as she gets older and you all work through the kinks here and there.

I think the best part of this story is that you're able to 'see' and want to. Your willingness, your attitude. That's deep inside you yet it shines all the way through cyberspace

God bless you always (((Rita))). You save one life, you save the world
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Old 03-24-2011, 11:50 AM
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MsPink!
I was feeling the same and came on board this am and read Jason's post. What an eye opener!

I totally know where you are coming from...the questions...can I do it? do I have the stamina? I'm too old for this! etc, etc.

Then I remember what the alternative is for my GD....living in chaos, drama and a living nightmare. She now sleeps in her own bed instead of with me. She even told her Mom this is her home now.

Yes, God is shining through Jason & Kirby!
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Old 03-24-2011, 11:58 AM
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Isnt is amazing how god answers us! Blessing to you and your family.
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Old 03-24-2011, 12:35 PM
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hang in there MsPink~~I don't know of a house that has the seal of approval from Good Housekeeping on the door that is doing as much as you are daily. Sounds like your doing a great job and keeping everyone loved and healthy. That's what its all about....hugs~
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Old 03-24-2011, 02:03 PM
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Sometimes it helps to remember to be gentle with yourself.

We don't have a choice in the challenges that life throws at us, but we do get to choose how we handle them.

In other words:

1. Don't sweat the small stuff.
2. It's all small stuff.

You're doing a special thing for your granddaughter and the rewards are great, I'm sure.
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Old 03-24-2011, 09:22 PM
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Thank you for taking care of your granddaughter instead of her living under awful circumstances. It's people like you who make the difference
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Old 03-24-2011, 09:33 PM
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Wow Rita! Kind of described my life there a bit...only I have two little ones and no help with them. It is CRAZY I agree. Some days I wonder myself, but I also agree that they deserve to not live in that kind of mess. I'd rather sacrifice some things in order to give them the peace that their little hearts and minds deserve. I never signed up for this...I did choose to have my kids, but never expected to be doing this alone.

Anyway, not trying to make this my sob story. I just wanted to share that I'm with you...and I agree.

Oh, and you CERTAINLY didn't sign up for this, but so glad you and Mr Pink are available to rescue this sweet child!!!

****{HUGS}}} Let's both get some rest. lol.
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Old 03-25-2011, 06:52 AM
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Rita
I was throwing my own little pity party this morning. Thank you for helping me to shake myself out of it. There is a lot to be grateful for in this life.
gentle hugs
ke
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Old 03-25-2011, 01:06 PM
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My two sons lived in a house with an active crack addict who hid in her room all day smoking crack or ran off for a weekend to smoke crack with her "boyfriend". Leaving behind enough food for them to eat but no Mommy. No attention. No love. No better off than dogs. My two boys deserved better so that crack had to go. 2 years clean and I can never take back what I did but I celebrate each day that I have with them and the time I can be the Mom I WANT and NEED to be. I love my sons. It took a lot to get off the crack, but -I- am worth it and THEY SURE ARE WORTH IT. I am so glad that, while you are tired and worn, you are celebrating getting to keep another child away from an active addict. I could have been worse, sure, but I should have been so much better because our children deserve it. I am happy to read your story and I hope you get a well deserved break and be able to play with that grandbaby and get lots and lots of rest. *HUGS*
Thank you for taking on that responsibility when her parents could not. Grandparents are a true blessing.
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Old 03-29-2011, 09:35 AM
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Living in a Pinkful Place
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Thanks for the love, support and prayers!

Once again I am so grateful for my SR family! The God of my understanding always uses it to give me the lift & encouragement I need!

To all of you who are taking care of these precious little ones ~ my thoughts & prayers are with you - and yes it is so worth it!

And to those of you who are trudging the road to overcome your addictions to be a parent - even if you stumble - please keep getting up and trying - because we may be great grandparents, but more than anything these little ones LOVE YOU - their parents and they really want to be with YOU - no matter what you may have struggled with before - THEY really adore you and want the very best for you and want to be WITH YOU - regardless!

So just keep on trying - we are pulling for you too! We have faith in you too!

PINK HUGS,
Rita
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