Hunkering down waiting for the storm to be spent
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Join Date: Jul 2007
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Hunkering down waiting for the storm to be spent
Like this "blizzard," I am hunkering down regarding my AS, my detachment from him, with my main topic of communication with him being that he's got a problem with drugs and alcohol and until he's ready to get help for that I've got nothing for him (except for that traumatic eye injury), and waiting for the consequences of his decisions to hopefully move him into active, meaningful sobriety.
But I feel a tad guilty as well as sad today. I've been talking to my other 2 grown children about how they are weathering the storm but have intentionally not contacted this AS. I miss him. I miss having a relationship with this third son. I miss not being able to call him and say, "Hey, if you are out of power, I've got mine - come on over." He is the only one who lives close to me - my other children are hours and hours away.
And yet, on the other hand, I was cleaning out some things the other day and came across some of his old school things that I have saved. And I said to myself, "Well, it seems like I could throw some of this out, but if he dies they will really mean a lot to me."
And this too, like the winter storm, shall pass. To every thing there is a season.
God please take care of all those struggling with drugs/alcohol - especially those who are in denial.
Random thoughts on a snowed-in day.
But I feel a tad guilty as well as sad today. I've been talking to my other 2 grown children about how they are weathering the storm but have intentionally not contacted this AS. I miss him. I miss having a relationship with this third son. I miss not being able to call him and say, "Hey, if you are out of power, I've got mine - come on over." He is the only one who lives close to me - my other children are hours and hours away.
And yet, on the other hand, I was cleaning out some things the other day and came across some of his old school things that I have saved. And I said to myself, "Well, it seems like I could throw some of this out, but if he dies they will really mean a lot to me."
And this too, like the winter storm, shall pass. To every thing there is a season.
God please take care of all those struggling with drugs/alcohol - especially those who are in denial.
Random thoughts on a snowed-in day.
I had limited contact with my daughter as well..when they are using, they really have nothing to offer a relationship and their world gets so small and yucky, there isn't alot to connect on..I too feared she would die and that's why I didn't go no contact..I had a friend that did and her sister DID die.
It's ok to not want to delve into that world with them..of course you mourn how you wish the relationship could be..and one day it may be what you hope.But protecting your serenity is your #1 priority just like protecting sobriety may one day be your sons..
It's ok to not want to delve into that world with them..of course you mourn how you wish the relationship could be..and one day it may be what you hope.But protecting your serenity is your #1 priority just like protecting sobriety may one day be your sons..
Hi sojouner, I'm weathering the storm up here in upstate NY as well... That and the storm of my son relapsing again and trying to not have contact with him. It is hard and I feel for all of us that are in this boat. Just wanted to stop by and give you a mom hug~~there are days we really need that squeeze.. Hugs~
It's been a bit tough lately here, too. Mr. HG has two stepsons, a daughter, and his A son. One of the stepsons was visiting recently with his family of 5 children. Mr. HG's daughter, SIL, and their 15 mo. old baby spent some time at the house visiting with them as well. It was wonderful to have a full house, but his AS was not there.....
We don't know when or if he will ever truly seek recovery and turn him over to his HP every day. It has seemed especially hard lately, and he called his father this past weekend to say he was sending him a letter. We don't know what that is going to be about. All we can do is wait and watch......
Hugs and prayers for you and your son. HG
We don't know when or if he will ever truly seek recovery and turn him over to his HP every day. It has seemed especially hard lately, and he called his father this past weekend to say he was sending him a letter. We don't know what that is going to be about. All we can do is wait and watch......
Hugs and prayers for you and your son. HG
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