Well here we go again....
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 15
Well here we go again....
And by WE, I mean HE, because this in NOT my problem anymore. Thank God I have chosen to get off that rollercoaster ride. Just a little update. I would not hold his bank card. I told him he was a grown man and needed to learn to manage his own money and be accountable for his own decisions. I told him that if he decided to use then that was up to him. He has to get tired of living that life and if he is not then good for him, but I know I sure am!
He got paid yesterday. He was suppose to come past my job to get some things from my car that he left in there. Well he never showed and when I tried to call him first he didn't answer, then he shut the phone off. I know this routine all too well. I haven't heard anything since. So much for being so concerned and greatful for the baby that's on the way. How do you see your child on ultrasound one day and go out there and use the next? I guess that's just what addicts do.
He is suppose to be at work today at 6 a.m. I don't know if he was able to pull it together to make it or if he had money to get there or what. He is on his last leg there. One more no call, no show after payday and that is it, he is done. I have pretty much come to terms with the fact it may take him losing his job for him to wake up and see the reality. Maybe that won't be enough. Maybe it will be jail or death, who knows?
I feel terrible saying this but I am not that upset. I don NOT feel guilty for sticking to my guns. When I told him I would not hold his money for him I already prepared myself for this. I find myself feeling mostly greatful that I can watch this all play out from a distance rather then being caught up in the middle, wondering when he will finally come home. While all this was going on I took my kids to chickfila and played in the playground with them. I met a good friend there and had wonderful conversation as well. Came home, put the little ones to bed, took my oldest to the YMCA (my sister was listening for the little ones), then me and him went to starbucks for hot chocolate. Came home, read on-line for a little and then went to bed. Slept all night except for once to use the restroom (one of the joys pf pregnancy!)
My world is not crashing. I am ok. I have wonderful supportive friends (including you all on here
and family who are excited and care about this baby, even if he doesn't. I can not control what he does. I have to live my life. I can only hope that one day he will want to live his, but if that never happens I will still be ok!
He got paid yesterday. He was suppose to come past my job to get some things from my car that he left in there. Well he never showed and when I tried to call him first he didn't answer, then he shut the phone off. I know this routine all too well. I haven't heard anything since. So much for being so concerned and greatful for the baby that's on the way. How do you see your child on ultrasound one day and go out there and use the next? I guess that's just what addicts do.
He is suppose to be at work today at 6 a.m. I don't know if he was able to pull it together to make it or if he had money to get there or what. He is on his last leg there. One more no call, no show after payday and that is it, he is done. I have pretty much come to terms with the fact it may take him losing his job for him to wake up and see the reality. Maybe that won't be enough. Maybe it will be jail or death, who knows?
I feel terrible saying this but I am not that upset. I don NOT feel guilty for sticking to my guns. When I told him I would not hold his money for him I already prepared myself for this. I find myself feeling mostly greatful that I can watch this all play out from a distance rather then being caught up in the middle, wondering when he will finally come home. While all this was going on I took my kids to chickfila and played in the playground with them. I met a good friend there and had wonderful conversation as well. Came home, put the little ones to bed, took my oldest to the YMCA (my sister was listening for the little ones), then me and him went to starbucks for hot chocolate. Came home, read on-line for a little and then went to bed. Slept all night except for once to use the restroom (one of the joys pf pregnancy!)
My world is not crashing. I am ok. I have wonderful supportive friends (including you all on here
and family who are excited and care about this baby, even if he doesn't. I can not control what he does. I have to live my life. I can only hope that one day he will want to live his, but if that never happens I will still be ok!
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,103
Originally Posted by Sarah8180 
My world is not crashing. I am ok. I have wonderful supportive friends (including you all on here and family who are excited and care about this baby, even if he doesn't. I can not control what he does. I have to live my life. I can only hope that one day he will want to live his, but if that never happens I will still be ok!
and family who are excited and care about this baby, even if he doesn't. I can not control what he does. I have to live my life. I can only hope that one day he will want to live his, but if that never happens I will still be ok!Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 66
You seem to be doing great!
Don't worry about him losing his job. If he does it may not be enough anyway. My XABF lost a really good job he had for years and it made him worse. Then he cycled through a few more but couldn't keep them. The addiction kept getting in the way.
Just worry about yourself and your babies!
Don't worry about him losing his job. If he does it may not be enough anyway. My XABF lost a really good job he had for years and it made him worse. Then he cycled through a few more but couldn't keep them. The addiction kept getting in the way.
Just worry about yourself and your babies!
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