First day here - addict 17yo son
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: minneapolis, mn
Posts: 2,762
givemetennis,
welcome to sober recovery. this is a terrific site, chock full of support and words of encouragement and comfort.
your son sounds a bit of a tough case. i think it's crystal clear that he simply does not wish to be sober. tough pill for you to swallow, but it is certainly the truth.
that said, what on earth would you be able to do to get him to: follow rules, show respect, not steal, not use....everything that goes hand in hand with drug addiction.
the answer is: nothing.
consider continuing al or nar anon. you would benefit from some peers/friends who also have children in this situation. it takes time is what i think. continuing to go doesn't hurt anything, right? a benefit may come (probably) down the road.
please keep coming back here, too. i would most suggest working on boundaries and not enabling.
peace...
welcome to sober recovery. this is a terrific site, chock full of support and words of encouragement and comfort.
your son sounds a bit of a tough case. i think it's crystal clear that he simply does not wish to be sober. tough pill for you to swallow, but it is certainly the truth.
that said, what on earth would you be able to do to get him to: follow rules, show respect, not steal, not use....everything that goes hand in hand with drug addiction.
the answer is: nothing.
consider continuing al or nar anon. you would benefit from some peers/friends who also have children in this situation. it takes time is what i think. continuing to go doesn't hurt anything, right? a benefit may come (probably) down the road.
please keep coming back here, too. i would most suggest working on boundaries and not enabling.
peace...
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,691
just wanted to welcome you as well. I am so sorry about everything that is going on with you but you've come to the right place where lots of us share similar struggles.
My husband is a sober (for 5 years now) crack addict. My 17 year old son has had a problem with pot for the last year and I'm really struggling over that....for me it's been really different having it be my son.......
Just wanted to say hi
My husband is a sober (for 5 years now) crack addict. My 17 year old son has had a problem with pot for the last year and I'm really struggling over that....for me it's been really different having it be my son.......
Just wanted to say hi
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Dallas area, TX
Posts: 11
coffeedrinker,
The day before we to rehab this time, he said he was 50/50 on whether or not he wanted to be sober. Now, he says he wants to be sober because he forgot how it feels to feel good and clean. But, we've heard that before...
The day before we to rehab this time, he said he was 50/50 on whether or not he wanted to be sober. Now, he says he wants to be sober because he forgot how it feels to feel good and clean. But, we've heard that before...
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: central coast, ca
Posts: 1,652
I am sure what he your son REALLY wants is what most addicts want..to be able to use /drink recreationally.He doesn't wwan to be an addict and different from the other teens who can party, n ot get addicted, have normal lives.It's so hard when they are this young. My daughter had to really live the dirty life for a while and be at the point of suicide before she decided maybe giving it up would be a good idea....it is hard for her now to mkae sober friends her own age.
At her 1st rehab a kid who was on his 3rd rehab said"I don't really want to give up drugs..but I want to be happy..and I can't use and be happy."He has been sober over a year now..17 years old.These kids are not used to feeling.not being able to check out mentally is really hard for them..their immature brains, impulsivity, etc make for lots of relapses.
At her 1st rehab a kid who was on his 3rd rehab said"I don't really want to give up drugs..but I want to be happy..and I can't use and be happy."He has been sober over a year now..17 years old.These kids are not used to feeling.not being able to check out mentally is really hard for them..their immature brains, impulsivity, etc make for lots of relapses.
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