cbeach

Hi, I am new to the site however I have been dealing with an addicted husband for many years. Opiates rule our lives. This is the first time I have really admitted to myself that it is important for me to have support. He has made me keep this secret hidden for so long that I have been virtually alone for 12 years now. Just me, him, and whatever narcotics he can get his hands on. About 8 months ago he went to a rehab facility in California, he didn't complete the program--and the only way he could come back home was if he attended a Christian based rehab. It worked for a while and now he has relapsed. I have faith in him but I have so much pent up fury I am afraid I will be the reason for the end of our marriage. He IS trying, where I realize so many don't want to or aren't ready. I really needs some help here. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.

sofacat

"This is the first time I have really admitted to myself that it is important for me to have support. "

That is an excellent place to start.

You have definitely come to the right place.
Though I am sorry you find yourself here...I'm sure glad you found us.

I was with an opiate addict for 10 years.
I had never felt so isolated and alone.
I felt like I was crazy...and I admit at times, I was.

I broke from him a year ago. New Year's Eve to be exact...I guess I just couldn't put it off one more day.
Didn't really matter who's "fault" it was that it ended...I just knew living with an addict was bad for me and I needed to get my life back.

Please take the time to read everything you can on here.
The stickies at the top of the Forums page are excellent.

As you stay with us for awhile, you'll start to feel better knowing you are not alone here...we have and are going through exactly what you are going through.

Others will be along soon to share their experiences with you as well.

We are you.

newnormal4me

If you take steps to end your marriage it is because of what he has done. It is not on you. It is a consequence of his actions.

I'm so sorry you are in this position. Those of us here have been there and we totally relate. It is not fair to have to live under these conditions.

Read all you can here and learn as much as you can.

****{HUGS}}} to you.

Kindeyes

They say that we are as sick as our secrets. Addiction is a disease. And it affects everyone who loves the addict....particularly those closest to them. We often become sick too. It's just the way the disease works.

The important thing is that you have reached your bottom.....you're sick and tired of being sick and tired. And that's a good thing. For him and for you. When we start to get healthy, we give them the best opportunity to get healthy too.

I find that this forum and my Naranon meetings keep me grounded and focused on myself. The words I read here and the things I share are a constant reinforcement of the behavioral changes I have to make.

I'm glad you're here. I hope you find the comfort in this forum that I have. There is so much wisdom from so many different perspectives. You are not alone.

gentle hugs