Haven't been here for 2 months

Old 12-24-2010, 11:41 AM
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Haven't been here for 2 months

Hello all my friends and Merry Christmas and pray Happy New Year!

How many times have we said, "next year has to be better!" It's almost comical any more!

Ok, here's the scope on my son!

He was caught with a syringe and needle also "empty" baggie! He went to jail and when he went to court he was pretty convinced that they couldn't do much to him because the "baggy" was empty! DUH, guess that means he had already used the stuff huh? His PD said he was facing 8 years because of his bad record, and the fact that he had not completed his last year of parole!

Right before this last arrest, he had written to a couple of rehabs and was waiting for his parole officer to ok his entry to a program. She never got back to him fast enough.

While in jail he wrote to a couple of rehabs and they did accept him if the judge and parole would agree. He also wrote to the DA and the judge to see if he could convince them.

He did! Such a great con artist! Something to be proud of huh? He even, once again, convinced me he was serious. DUMB!!

He spent 3 months in jail and was, of course, looking just great by the time he got out. Once out, he was to wait until his parole officer got him a bed. Just so happened she was out on vacation and no one else could ok this! I couldn't believe that so I called myself and talked to the officer of the day. Sure enough, he had to wait for her. Finally 5 days passed and during that time he was doing everything right. Met up with his old friend that he was in prison with 3 years ago, and who has been clean now all this time. Went to meetings, got a sponsor, was working his steps, etc. Had a great weekend with his friend and all looked hopeful!

Not! He is suppose to leave here on the 28th, which he will; however, as far as I'm concerned, he cannot leave fast enough! I know he has used again! I told him I know, and of course he denies it!

When he first came home I thought there might be a chance that he could move back here after his 90 days of rehab; however, I now know that this is never going to be an option! I cannot wait until he leaves because his attitude is horrible! That's due to his using once again!

I'm happy when he is not in the house! I don't worry when he is not here because if he gets in trouble, he knows what will happen. I'm tired of him and his stinking drug use! I have his grandaughter that we are raising, and he cannot think of anyone but himself!

Kick me with those bunny cleated shoes if I ever allow his butt back in our home again!

Ok, now that I vented, I have to go tend to more important things such as my little 3 year old! Which is why I have hardly any time to visit with you all. I miss you bunches!

Have a Merry Xmas all, and hope you have the best New Year ever!

Hugs, "DUMMY" aka, Devastated

OK, judge ordered him to rehab for 90 days.
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Old 12-24-2010, 11:51 AM
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Ann
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Dev, the good part about it all getting old, is that so do we (although you'd never know we aged a day) and there comes a time when we just say "enough"

"Enough" is a good word. It means "No more darkness, hello light". It means instead of trying to guess "Did they or didn't they?" we get to have our nails and hair done and people can guess "Is she 39 or 40?"

We get to live life well, Dev, even if our boys choose not to. We get to live guilt free because we know we did our best and that even our best can't change anyone who doesn't want to change.

We get to love little children, and smile, and sleep without our purses under the pillow.

"Enough" gives us the freedom to let go and let God.

Merry Christmas, dear friend, I love you lots.
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Old 12-24-2010, 10:59 PM
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Merry Christmas, Dev. Focus on the happiness of this special day with a 3 year old and don't worry about your son. You know he will do what he will do.

I'd love to see a new picture of that beautiful little girl if you get a chance. Hugs.
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Old 12-24-2010, 11:03 PM
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(((Dev))) - so sorry your son hasn't "gotten it" yet, but proud of you for saying "ENOUGH!!" I'm sure you, ((Mr. Dev)) and that ((precious granddaughter)) will have a good Christmas. She's learning, early, some really good codie recovery..I can just hear her, in kindegarten, saying "I SAID, enough!!!!"

Love, hugs, and prayers,

Amy
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Old 12-24-2010, 11:12 PM
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Dear Dev - You don't know me from Adam. Yet your posts over the years have helped me keep on going. Thank you very much. I am a double winner.

Merry Christmas. I am so sorry for your pain. I understand. Thanks for bringing clarity into my life when I think that I am going crazy.
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Old 12-25-2010, 05:00 PM
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I'm so sorry. I was thinking of the Dev Family, just yesterday. Hugs.
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Old 12-28-2010, 11:13 AM
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Dear, Dear, Friends

Thanks to all of you for your support over the years. I like to think I've grown up a bit since 2004, but sometimes I wonder!!

Ann, you are so right about not having to sleep with the purse under the bed, or the rings in the bra!! LOL That's a good thing.

Now all I worry about is the great-grandchild and praying that she grows up drug-free!

The social worker was here the other day and the baby was acting up a bit! I said to her, "excuse me, what are the rules?" She proceeds to say, 1. No smoking! 2. No tattoos, 3. No drugs, 4. No piercings and 5. No drinking! OMG, I laugh every time she does that! Social worker was hysterical!

Anyway, hope I remember how to download a photo. Here's goes nothing, once again!

Hugs, Devastated
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Old 12-28-2010, 11:33 AM
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Ann
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Oh Dev, she is absolutely beauuuutiful. Must have your genes.

Those rules are precious. Thank goodness the social worker doesn't know that the warden's phone number used to be on your speed dial. Isn't it good to put those days behind us...well, we can dig them back out once in a while to laugh at how crazy we were.

Today when anyone kids me and says "you're crazy", I catch myself thinking "Honey, these are my sane years, you should have caught the craziness a few years back...now THAT was crazy!"

Happy New Year, dear Dev, for you, Mr. Dev and that adorable little girl who knows the rules

Hugs
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Old 12-28-2010, 03:34 PM
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Thanks Ann

We think she's pretty cute too!

Speaking of those crazy days reminds me of when my son was in yet another fire camp. I use to drive a couple of hours to visit once a month. This one particular time I visited was also the same time he was allowed to have his quarterly package. I decided instead of mailing it, I would take it with me.

Now, I knew this was against the rules, but figured if I batted my eyes enough I could get by with it. Sure enough I did! The officer of the day said "this one time only!"

He got a couple of guys to get it out of the car but it was so heavy they couldn't get it out without a dolly! The officer said, "how much does it weigh?" I said, (while still batting my eyes) I didn't know because I just added things to the box while it was in the car. When they put it on the scale it weight 65 pounds instead of the 35 it was suppose to weigh. I looked shocked! It's really hard to "bat your eyes" while looking shocked!

Anyway, that was the end of bringing in packages! In fact, after that they passed a rule where you had to buy from approved stores only through the state!

Man, I was always trying to take care of my boy!! God forbid he suffer!

Anyway, going to show you a photo of me with the baby. Silly of her, but good of me. I told Mr. Dev I want this photo blown up and put in a frame on top of my casket. He said, "whazza cakett?" Forget it!

Funny, people tell me I'm crazy too, and I thnk, like you, you should have known me when!! LOL Remember the mailman that I scared to death when he asked me who I knew in San Quentin? Funny!!

Love you Ann, God forbid if we ever got together!! As it is now, when I got out with my girlfriend her husband's last words are "try to not get in trouble!"
Please, i HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HE MEANS!

Hugs, Devastated I don't think this one is going to work!!

<a href="http://s52.photobucket.com/albums/g36/meconi/?
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Old 12-28-2010, 03:41 PM
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Didn't think that was going to work. So, will try again!



Hugs, Devastated
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Old 12-28-2010, 04:16 PM
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You are both soooooo beautiful! And, Dev there is no way this is your great grand daughter - I am having trouble believing you are a grandma, never mind a great grandma!

I'm so glad that despite the sadness, there are things we can laugh about in going through this mess.

By the way, my future son in law, who is engaged to my daughter who found her way through the mess of binge drinking and now has a wonderful life, has told me that when they have kids, since my name is Anne Marie, the babies will call me GranMarie
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Old 12-28-2010, 05:46 PM
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She's so beautiful! I'm sorry to hear about your son, but I am glad that you are able to take care of your grandchild. She is so fortunate to have you to care for her. I was pretty much raised by my grandparents (due to addict parents). I am forever thankful that they were there for me. Bless you!
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Old 12-29-2010, 12:36 AM
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(((Dev))) - you ARE both beautiful! I love the rules, and I bet it brought a big smile to the social worker's face.

I'm soooooo glad you are back here...I've missed you!

Hugs and prayers,

Amy
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Old 12-29-2010, 03:35 AM
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Ann
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Dev, that lovely picture made me cry...now I have to go and fix my mascara again or spend the day looking like Tammy Faye Baker.

You are so beautiful, inside and out, no wonder Mr. Dev chases you around.

I don`t know who is more blessed, your sweet great-grandbaby or you...I think the blessings flow both ways.

Hugs from the lady of the north, presently in the south.
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