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Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery

Old 12-14-2010, 02:47 PM
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Post Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery

There have been quite a few people lately struggling with the decision about going to meetings and some such as myself struggling to keep going even though I know they help me. I ran across the following today I trust my HP led me to it. I hope this, is ok to post.


The following is from the book The Language of Letting Go
Author: Melody Beattie

Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery

We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering.

Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge it is cold and dark. We stood there with others in the cold and darkness, doubled over in pain. Some of us developed an eating disorder to cope with the pain. Some drank;
Some used other drugs. Some of us lost control of our sexual behavior.

Some of us obsessively focused on addicted peopleís pain. Many of us did both: we developed an addictive behavior, and distracted ourselves by focusing on other addictive people. We did not know there was a bridge. We thought we were trapped on a cliff.

Then, some of us got lucky. Our eyes opened, by the Grace of God, because it was time. We saw the bridge.
People told us what was on the other side: warmth, light, and healing from our pain. We could barely glimpse or imagine this, but we decided to start the trek across the bridge anyway.

We tried to convince the people around us on the cliff that there was a bridge to a better place, but they wouldnít listen. They
Couldnít see it; they couldnít believe. We decide to go alone, because we believed, and because people on the other side were
Cheering us onward. The closer we got to the other side, the more we could see, and feel what had been promised was real. There
Was light, warmth, healing, and love. The other side was a better place.

But now there is a bridge between us and those on the other side.
Sometimes, we may be tempted to go back and drag them over with us, but it cannot be done. No one can be dragged or forced across this bridge. Each person must go at his or her own choice, when the time is right. Some will come; some will stay on the other side. The choice is not ours.

We can love them. We can wave to them. We can holler back and forth. We can cheer them on, as others have cheered and encouraged us. But we cannot make them come over with us.

If our time has come to cross the bridge, or if we have already crossed and are standing in the light and warmth, we do not have to feel guilty. It is where we are meant to be. We do not have to go back to the dark cliff because anotherís time has not yet come.

The best thing we can do is stay in the light, because it reassures others that there is a better place. And if others ever do decide to cross the bridge, we will be there to cheer them on.


Today, I will move forward with my life, despite what others are doing or not doing. I Will know it is my right to cross the bridge to a better life, even if I must leave others behind to do that. I will not feel guilty, I will not feel ashamed. I know that where I am now is a better place and where Iím meant to be.

For, me personally many of the people at SR are those standing on the other side of the bridge cheering me on and for that I want to say thank you.:ghug3
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Old 12-14-2010, 02:59 PM
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Thanks for sharing. This explains exactly what is happening for me!!!!
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Old 12-14-2010, 03:04 PM
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Thank you for sharing this great message of hope and truth with us!!!!
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Old 12-14-2010, 06:25 PM
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I've got that saved on my desk top, very powerful. I'd forgotten where it came from, great analogy.

Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote
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Old 12-15-2010, 07:52 AM
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Thank you so much for sharing that. For me as well, it is exactly what has happened for me....
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Old 12-15-2010, 08:40 AM
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When you feel like going to a meeting..go.When you don't ..GO!!! That's when you need it!!
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Old 12-15-2010, 10:36 AM
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Thank you for posting those inspiring words. I really needed them.
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Old 12-15-2010, 07:11 PM
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I love that one.
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