aiw

I'm absolutely amazed at how ignorant I was about addiction, and how I was hurting my son, prior to reading here. My eyes are now open and I'm hungry to learn more so I can help my son instead of stand in his way. I simply can't express how much gratitude I have for all of you...tirelessly sharing your experiences and providing the support that you do! I certainly wouldn't be having a good day today without all of you...I would still be so confused, knowing that I wasn't helping but clueless as to what was wrong. I have my first Al-anon meeting tomorrow night and am just as excited about what I'll learn there. I also call my son's father (recovering addict) regularly to get his point of view when needed and he's been extremely helpful and supportive as well. There's a long road ahead but I don't feel alone anymore...thank you all so much!!!!!!

Spiritual Seeker

We share our experience, strength and hope.
You are doing the same.
It's a journey.
Your son is fortunate that you're his mom.

keepinon

I benefit so much from the recovering addicts o this site..Meditation, Impurrfrect, Freedom, to name a few. His father being in recovery can be a great resource for you. Bet you he will tell you that you can't say anything to change his behavior, consequences are really the only thing that spur wanting to change. When I had enough pain with my daughter, I went to Alanon and i did whatever they told me, I surrendered MY WAY which didn't work, and went on FAITH that these people were happy and I was gonna trust them. It is sooo hard, but you can do this..and have your own life..you can be happy even when he isn't.

Chino

Recovery is definitely a journey, not a destination.
It's life changing and we're all traveling together

johndelko408

I'm very happy to hear this aiw. I remember you from your initial post when you said it feels so unnatural not to be able to help your son when he's suffering. That's cool that your ex is in recovery because he can help relieve a lot of confusion for you and answer questions you may have. So you're going to al-anon....your gonna learn the al-anon handshake and salute. I bet they'll kind of give you a laugh.

Kindeyes

I haven't been made privy to the secret handshake......should I be concerned?

lol

gentle hugs

johndelko408

Kidneyes....The al-anon handshake is actually when an al-anon waves their index finger at you sort of like saying shame, shame, shame on you. The salute is when an al-anon puts the back of their hand against their forehead almost as if they're thinking "oh no, not again". I think its supposed to be like an inside joke for them, a bit of humor for the ones we have made suffer. It isn't anything you should be concerned about. I'm an AA and I kind of got a laugh out of it the first time I saw it.

marteen

We are all "works in progress"!!
and caring and sharing!

Hugs,
Marteen