keepinon

Well we had a very nice visit.She was funny and open and fairly humble. We talked alot about serious stuff, but also had fun and did a little shopping. When I took her back to her sle, I saw that the sober date they have on a chalkboard by their names said 9/26.. I said I thought it was 8/20. Well it turns out that she drank and that's why she was put on "restriction" at the house. She apparently cried and told them she "didn't want to live this kind of life" and begged them not to kick her out.

So one of my worst fears was realized..RELAPSE! But I didn't overreact. She really seems to be committed and is working her program. She told me she realizes she can't drink , but initially did struggle with the idea of "never again".

The most important thing for me was that she MAKES SENSE when we talk.It has literally been YEARS. She is listening to other people ..including ME!!!!!Wow..I got to actually feel like a mom today.It was really nice.

Ann

I'm so glad it went well for both of you. I have a feeling it will just keep getting better.

Hugs

sojourner

keepinon: Thanks for the good report. It is truly encouraging for me to read these kinds of posts. Esp the part where you notice that your daughter is starting to be logical again. There are people in my family who would say of my AS's mental status that "well, that's just the way he is." No! I scream - he is not a foggy-headed lout!!

Your recovery is an example to me.

Sojourner

Kindeyes

keepinon
Thanks for the update on your daughter and YOU! And good for you for not overreacting to the news of her brief relapse. She begged them not to kick her out! She wanted to get right back on track! THAT's the news to hold on to! And you DID! I am so happy for you and your daughter.

gentle hugs

MsPINKAcres

RELAPSE

As you know - I am all to familiar with that word !

glad your daughter is walking a healthier path this time -
seems my daughter is doing the same thing too

Acknowledging the relapse and seeking help to keep it from happening again ~ Their HP has a plan ~ we just have to step back and let them work it out.

Ain't always easy but it is what is healthy, respectful and loving.

Keep taking good care of YOU too!!!!

PINK HUGS,
Rita

keepinon

Kinda feel like my HP was preparing me to find out about her slip by having me read about your daughter the day before Ms.PinkAcres. After reading about how gracefully you handled it, I wanted to do that when she told me what happened.I could see the shame in her face and I did not want to add to it.I was just pretty matter of fact and didn't comment on it very much.I asked her if she was upset I found out and she said that she was totally relieved. I felt much better prepared beacuse of what i read you did..so cool how we help each other and we don't even know sometimes.

crazybabie

I am happy that your daughter realized she didn't want to live that life and that they let her stay after she slipped. She relapsed and threw herself back in the program.

Sounds to me that she really wants help and recovery.

Impurrfect

(((Keep))) - YAY on the great visit!!!

I'm so glad you were, sort of, prepared for the relapse thing. I think that the fact that she was "relieved" that you found out, shows that she's beginning to see what kind of impact her actions have on others, and she is wanting to be honest.

Now, there's still a ways to go, but that's a darned good start!! It sounds like BOTH of you are really working your programs, and I agree with ((Ann)) - I think it's going to get even better

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

FGB

I was happy for you when I read your post. It also gives hope to others. Thank you and good wishes for the future.

litehorse

"i got to actually feel like a mom today" - those words gave me a warm fuzzy - i am so happy for you and your daughter - sounds like a good time to keep praying

dollydo

To me , the best conversations with my mother have come about because I was totally honest with her and she with me. No judgement, kind of like two women who have just met, and were sharing our today, not our yesterday and no expectations of our tomorrows.

Your HP was and is in your corner.

Sending hugs your way,

meditation

Keep, wow sounds like a very good visit. Your daughter I pray she sticks to this way of living. It's amazing when our daughters are warm loving, sane, kind. My 19 has been doing the screaming/hateful/ pouting/sulking thing and it's just not acceptable to treat people badly. Then the next day it's like I've got a 5 year old that's needy, I can't figure out the program. I told her nobody gave me a manual on raising her and I'm just doing the best I can. I love her and I have had to apologize to her for being an addict and hurting her for those 3 years I was not in mommy mode.

Thanks for sharing the good and the bad with us. I don't see her relapse as anything but something that helped motivate her to want true recovery. It might have been a blessing.

wicked

I wondered how I would live without it, cause I had been drinking for twenty years.
It turns out, much better. LOL

Yes, keepinon, when they are young, they are still dumb.
One day at a time. That is all she needs to remember.
But it is tough when you are so young and dumb.
(you know i mean that in the nicest mommy way. my daughter is brilliant, but quite stupid when it comes to men and addiction. lessons to be learned for both of us.)
We can do it.
You have been holding your own like a champ keep.

Beth

Serenity Bound

keepinon, sounds like HP has a plan. It seems your daughter is waking up to what sober living can feel like and how much better she feels clean. IMO her slip was just that, a slip and a learning experience. Good job by both of you.

Hugs & Prayers,
Chris

keepinon

It is really hard not to look at all the relapses lately and be scared, but I don't wanna live in any kind of fear anymore. I ask myself"what if she stays clean and you spent all this time worrying?" It is truly up to her and I'm gonna do my best to enjoy her as she is right now!Thanks all you guys!

Kindeyes

keepinon
With my son current in inpatient treatment, I understand your concerns for your daughter. I am trying to sleep well and appreciate the knowledge that he is clean and sober today.

One day at a time, my friend.

gentle hugs