Tubzzz14

hey i need advice on how to help my gf she told me today that she started "blowing lines" of coke and that she has only been doing it for a week and i am extremely concerned and she said that she trusts me more then anyone. she says she wants to tell her parents on sunday and thats her deadline i am afraid that she wont say anyhting to them. I love her so much and i dont know what to do or what to say to her.

any advice this is my first time dealing with something like this

dollydo

I can feel your concern. Coke is a very powerful drug. I would suggest that you read up on it.

As for helping her, there really is nothing you can do. It is her issue to resolve. I too hope that she tells her parents, as she will need a strong support system to overcome the desire to use cocaine.

Keep posting, it will help.

Live

Welcome to SR, please make yourself at home.

I would suggest reading the stickies at the top of the forum for starters

Tubzzz14

hey guys just an update her last line was on fri morning and last night she went home from work early because of withdrawels. She ended up telling her mom about her using cocaine over the last week or so and her cutting (i didnt know about that). She also sent me this text " i know this is going to kill you, but i can hardly keep track of myself and im haveing a hard time like, with life basically right now haha but i cant be like in a relationship. i like litterally have enough to give myself right now, i cant give more to anyone or anything." when i read this while driving i broke down and started to cry. i completely understood why she did that and i am so glad she is going to get help. but i told her this "Its ok im not gunna sit here and tell you it dosent hurt me, but i completely understand and i was expectiing this text. no matter what you know im here for you adn i just want you to get back to what you were.".

i need help. i dont know how to handle this situation anymore.

i hope when she gets sober we are back together

crazybabie

While she is working her recovery maybe you should start working yours? Try some meetings?

Best of luck to you.

Tubzzz14

i have nothing to recover from ive never done any drugs weed/ coke/ x nothing im sober i jusst dont know what to do the only thing that makes me forget about everything is when i take my car up to 140+ for those 10-30 seconds i forget about everything and it makes me feel free.

crazybabie

I do not do drugs either I am working a program for people who care about someone with an addiction. It can be a long hard road. Was just a suggestion.

I Have a husband and two sons with addictions.

Tubzzz14

yeah. im sorry im just an emotional wreck right now because i jsut was left by the girl i love and its all because of a drug. And i dont know what she wants me to do, should i text her?wait for her to text me? im so sorry im rambling but like i truley love her and i told her this.

crazybabie

Welcome to SR, I am sorry for the reasons you came here...

That was one reason I suggested "Your" recovery, IMO you should not text her, unfournately when using the drug you lost her too is what is on her mind, I have been married for 26 years and this is also new to me with hubby.

I understand your desperation and hurt,

Remember you didn't cause it
You can't cure it
You can't control it

What are you hoping to achieve by texting her?

I am very impulsie so I make myself ask before I call or text hubby what am I hoping to achieve, an example my daughter has a friend that calls me mom, her brother took an overdose yesterday (Thankfully he is going too be ok) I was going to text hubby and tell him, when I asked myself why I knew it was to let him know this could happen to him,
I did not send that text...

hurtandangry

cocaine from the voice of experience

cocaine makes me feel like a new man.......only problem is all that new man wants is another line.

good luck Tubzzz and take care of yourself!

Tubzzz14

well she is getting help for it she isnt allowed to leave her house she is going to get bloodwork done and is going to see multiple doctors. i just hope that she will be back to herself and we an continue with our relationship

coffeedrinker

Tubzzz,

First of all, Welcome to this forum. I truly believe this is a really terrific site. There's a ton of caring, smart and kind people, who have a wealth of experience on this "loving an addict" thing.

My thoughts are that there's a LOT of stuff for you to absorb, and to learn about, regarding addiction.

We here on this forum are trying to learn to not be so involved (some might say obsessed) with our addicted loved ones, and learn to love and take care of ourselves. In this way, we see ourselves as affected, sort of ill in a sort of similar way as the addict is ill. From this type of "illness", we wish to recover.

One more thought:
she will not be "back to herself". Nor do you really want her to be, right? If you want this new, clean and honest, and drug-free woman in your life, one day, then you too need to be a new work. We are here to help one another become that new work.

Please keep coming back here.