dixiegirl69

Okay,
My boyfriends mother has verbally threatened me a couple of times. I have yelled back at her and my boyfriend has been physically and verbally attacked by her as well... she is on some type of drugs because she is always high looking... I don't know what to do, and she has told me some serious S&^% is going to go down. I'm 19 and he is 22 and we both have jobs. We currently live with his grandfather who allows her to come over to his house, as well as the sister of my boyfriend who has pulled a knife on my boyfriend and stole a gun from his grandfather just days ago. She has confessed to doing it, but the grandfather is so sensitive towards them (thinking they need his help), he is putting me and my boyfriend in danger. Unfortunately we do not have the money to move away, so I was wondering if I(me and my boyfriend) can get restraining orders placed on the mother and sister...for verbally assaulting us?

chicory

I think I would be more worried about the missing gun than verbal assaults. this sounds like a dangerous situation, ready to blow.
please put yourself in a safe place.

suki44883

You would need to speak to an official about that. It varies from state to state. In the meantime, keep yourself safe. Finding other living arrangements makes sense.

Kindeyes

First and foremost, stay safe. Situations like this are very worrisome. Take whatever measures you feel you need to in order to stay safe.

gentle hugs

Live

ah! Florida is an easy state in this respect.

Drop by your local sheriff's office and pick up a no trespass form..fill it out, make yourself a copy, and mail it certified to prove receipt.

Then if it is violated you can phone police and the offender will be arrested.

blackstrat6

Mention the gun. That shows she has the means and you literally fear for your life. Not to mention theft of a firearm is not looked upon lightly.
You really should seek a safer place though, do you have family that can help you guys, give you a safer place to be temporarily?

suki44883

How would that work if she is living in someone elses house and wants to forbid someone from coming there? Wouldn't the person owning the property be the one to do that? How can they dictate who can and cannot come onto someone elses property, if the property owner invites them?

blackstrat6

Its an order against the person not the location. This would include stores, houses, anywhere in public. So if she had an order and was at the g-fathers, the person who order is against would have to not be there.

smacked

Usually, not much is needed for a temporary order. You might want gpa on board since it will invariably effect his relationship with her, because of him not being 'allowed' to have her at his house (is he in agreement with this whole thing?). That seriously complicates the issue, honestly.

After the temporary order, you go to court to prove to a judge that you are in danger, and it's either made permanent, or thrown out, depending on what the judge decides.

While you may feel that grandpa is 'putting your life in danger' by allowing people there that you fear, ultimately where you live is up to you, this is not your home.. and if you are in danger, and can't afford to move, you can go to a shelter. You can also call the police.

If someone living in my house were to put a restraining order against someone else that I had an ongoing and active relationship with, I'd likely boot them from my house, as it's not my issue.

dixiegirl69

honestly, the grandfather is on board...and we can't really do anything with the restraining order because the sister decided to put our address on her drivers license when she doesnt even live here! So when I talked to the cop that dropped her off, he said there was nothing they could do. They can't deny someone from coming to their 'home.' and yes I do live here, I do pay to live here and the grandfather is tired of all the bull and just wants to relax in his final years.

suki44883

The grandfather may decide to just kick everyone out so he can enjoy his home without all the chaos. No one could blame him for that. Since you and your husband both work, it might be good to start saving up to get a place of your own so you don't have to deal with these things.

Freedom1990

I don't understand how a person can request an address on a driver's license that benefits them, not where they actually live.

I've had to provide proof of address/residency like a rent receipt anytime I've moved in this town in order to get a license with a current address.

dixiegirl69

Grandpa said he doesn't want us to leave because he loves us and we are the only ones that really help him. I knew I was going to get negative comments here, but I take them with a grain of salt because you don't know the whole story. I dont feel comfortable explaining the whole year. I don't want those emotions to rise back up again. I just want to feel safe. We are saving up to eventually move out, but, however, once the grandfather dies, whether it be tomorrow or ten years from now, we have to move back in until my boyfriends uncle gets back from serving in IRAQ. My parents are behind us all 100% and they've even offered to help us pay for things. We can't move in with them due to my other 5 siblings living there, but I'm ready to be safe again. IDK, maybe y'all think it's just some 19 year old looking for attention, but I have never seen a family act like this, and the fact that a mother and a sister would do everything in her power to see her son in jail or dead or suffering...it kills me

Freedom1990

That has to be incredibly painful for your BF to have a mother and sister like that. I'm sorry.

suki44883

I wasn't being negative, I was being positive. It would be a positive thing for you and your husband to have your own place where you can dictate who is and is not welcome. I would think that getting away from these toxic people would be a priority. Sorry if you took what I said as being negative. Good luck.

dixiegirl69

yes, i did take it as negativity. Getting away from the toxicity of the situation is one of our main priorities. I'm sorry for reading your take on it wrong. I'm just exhausted.

Live

I did live in FL.

I went and got a no trespass form from the sheriff's.

I don't think what the cop told you was accurate.

I, also, got a driver's license down there and used my sister's address as I was moving. No prob. Didn't need any documentation.
Also FL issues driver's licenses for a longer period of time than most states. Mine was good for 7 years.

I am sure you are worn out!

I would still suggest getting that form and starting there..until you can move out, which would get you away from it.

newnormal4me

My lawyer suggested I get a restraining order against my husband, who lives in our home. I didn't follow through with it, but it doesn't matter if the person lives there...I know of other people that had a spouse removed from their home. If someone is being threatening, it shouldn't matter where they live! I'd seek some assistance from a lawyer if you can. Sometimes there are opportunities for free legal advice. Take care.

crazybabie

This must depend on the stae one lives in because my dad has always had his DL sent to my address,

crazybabie

I have found that in my area the police are not always correct. Maybe call the courthouse general information line and see if the can give you a starting place to call.
Best of luck,
Hugs