Babyblue

Hi Katt,
You have come to the right place for feedback. The bottom line is you are dealing with something much bigger than you can imagine. Addiction is addiction. I won't judge you for using drugs, Lord knows I did my share in my younger days for 'fun' but out of the group of people I had 'fun' with, some ended up with serious addiction problems. It is a risky type of fun which has huge consequences, such as the one your guy is facing.

There isn't anything you can do but take care of yourself. He will need detox, treatment etc. It isn't something he can just get off of with kind words of encouragement. It isn't something that a pat on the back will cure. Nothing you do or don't do will help him beat this. It is a very powerful feeling to be needed to the extent that the addict needs us but it will tap you dry emotionally, spritually and financially..and he will be no closer to getting well.

Please look after yourself. There is no such thing as moderate addiction, parttime addiction, occassional addiction or mild addiction. It is ALL addiction and addiction is progressive. That means it goes from bad to worse to awful. It affects all addicts the same way. That is really what the other posters are trying to get across to you.

He will not be able to beat his addiction any differently than any other heroin addict because of the very nature and chemistry of heroin. Period.

bb.

pfalcone23

okay so i feel you COMPLETELY here. my boyfriend of six years was a closet heroin addict. its a very long story but i will try to make it short. first theres no judging bcuz i felt i was reading my own story. a few years ago he started getting into vicodens and norcos. throught a 2 year course he went thru all the pain pills possible. loratabs. percacet. somas. then to lose dose oxy high dose oxy morphine and even diluadid. the last three i had no clue about and was done behind my back. i worshiped the ground this guy walked on! love him to death and worry everyday. i trusted him with every ounce of me although we had a horrid relationship to start with. i approached him on it. promised to never touch it again and didnt want to lose me. he was going to meetings and being watched by either me or his parents. (we lived with hes dad) ( he is 21 now and i am 19) one day somthing in my gut told me to look in his truck. there i found 2 oxy 80 mg and 2 folded up foils with black trail marks. he told me he smoked oxy. and of course i believed him. then other ppl told me it was heroin and i was mortified! i didnt want to leave him bcuz i didnt want his addiction to b out of control with out me. i stayed and helped. and of course he lied time after time. about two months later april 4 2 days before my birthday we had gotten in a fight to cool off i drove to his moms house ( whom i still work under) and 30 min i went home. he wasnt there. this is 12 at night. i drove to any drug dealers house in toen i could think of and couldnt find him and decided to go home. as i pull up he pulls up behind me. we start to argue and i tell him to get out of his truck. and that i was searching it. he bee lined it to the house. i grabbed him and turned him around to pull a rock of black tar heroin out of his jacket. at this moment i knew my life had changed forever. the next day i packed my belongs and left as hes begging me not to leave. THAT WAS THE ABSOLUTE HARDEST THING IV EVER HAD TO DO!!!! it has been 7 months since that day and every day i fear for his life and am just waiting for the phone call to come say goodbye. i gave him a chance about two months after the break up and offered to pay for the nicest rehab around ! he chose the path of drugs. and oce again the drugs won over me. jus like you said ur not married. not children. its not ur burden. when u step out of the manipulating mind ******* box. youll see jus how bad things really are, mine made me feel like the adddict and all i do is smoke weed. i can honestly tell u iv had horrible days and iv had great days. and iv realized that a women is not suppose to b treated the way addicts treat. i felt it was never love from him i was jus comfort. i hope u the best in your desicions and life. and always remember keep your chin and and do whzt makes YOU happy.