damnedone

well few nights ago I was talking to him, and telling him I was feeling a bit down, but his presence makes me feel much better.. then his reply shocked me "I think it's called co-dependance", but explained it as one's feelings depending on someone else... I freaked out and said I can live without him :P

funny thing is that I don't consider myself a codie anymore.. or well, one with limits, but I don't want to go into that story.. I just wonder what made him think of that and if anyone else had epxerienced their addicts calling them "co-dependants", or anyone else (besides therapists)

URMYEVERYTHING

My exabf never used the term codependant but had the balls to say that "You can't live without me." "You need me." "There is no one else out there that will treat you as good as I do."

Hmmpf......

Well, needless to say, that was emotional manipulation. In fact, he was never around. I had my own place. I didn't need him for anything as he was super unreliable and in and out of detox/rehab. And, I'm sure I will find someone who doesn't steal from me and shoot up Heroin. So, there exabf.....kiss my A. LOL.

damnedone

oh ow that sounds bad =/ I'm sorry you experianced that

with my guy it's the other way around, he doesn't want me to be too "glued" to him, says he doesn't like it and it's not good for me.. so that's why I said I can live without him..

dollydo

He may be being perfectly honest, he doesn't want a clinging vine. Nothing wrong with that.

Take some time to think about what he said, read "Codependent No More" might help you get a better handle on the situation.

damnedone

Thank you for advice dolly, I'm not exactly new into this and we really got to talking about drugs openly, we're very close friends and I know everything ce-dependancy involves, just this really shocked me and I will probably ask him one day what made him think about co-dependancy and how does he know about it, it's not something you hear people talking about every day. And yes, I know this is a typical thing codies say, but he really doesn't have most of the traits addicts have, and he's a very kind and sweet person. it's not a mask, I've seen it clearly. don't want to get into details again now, but I felt like sharing this experiance I've had, it was so strange hearing that word coming from him