What is "healthy" detachment supposed to look like?
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: henderson nevada
Posts: 5
Hello, you are so right about detachment being a state of mind. I never thought I could do this, but I have actually...as I said in another post ...started the detachment process. Feeling better and somewhat liberated. I was a real wreck for the months of March and most of April. I went looking for hidden bottles of gin and found them in his golf bag...I was diluting them with water. Trying to "catch" him drinking..because he was denying he was drinking even though it was so obvious. I felt so betrayed and insulted. After five years of sobriety..he relapsed last fall I believe..although not sure. SO much lying and denying. We just moved into a new apartment and he assured me he wasn't drinking...so funny. (I wanted to believe him). His drinking and my behavior was consuming me until I found this website one night, and decided I was going to try and "detach"..and I already feel a lot better. I will try and stay focused on me. The various posts from members really help me. Thanks,
Enid
Enid
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Up and onwards... :)
Posts: 274
Angelic17 - your response struck me to my core (in a good way). It's interesting how this old thread came up from "NewNormal" from last summer just at a time where I am crying out for help... thanks ladies (and men) for your insight and encouragement to those who are in need. I hope one day to be strong enough to help some of you out. 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 390
Kind of crazy to see this tonight...and to really remember where I was last summer and where I am now. World's of difference. But still dealing with the addict...yikes! Baby steps, one day at a time.
Oh, and I just printed out Chino's list! I'm definitely more ready for it now.
Canfix, hang in there! You are making progress. It can just be so darn slow sometimes.
Oh, and I just printed out Chino's list! I'm definitely more ready for it now.
Canfix, hang in there! You are making progress. It can just be so darn slow sometimes.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Up and onwards... :)
Posts: 274
Thanks new! I like what you said that you notice a world of difference where you were at last year to this... still dealing with your addicted loved one... but it IS baby steps and sometimes a big plop on the bum from the wobbles... but we will get there one day.
Here's to strength, courage, love and hope for all of us.
but we will get there one day.Here's to strength, courage, love and hope for all of us.
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