Could it be?
 

That my stumbling block is nothing more than accepting the fact of my own codependency?

I suppose it is, Sailor John.

I've come to accept that I'm codependent. Grudgingly.

pretty big stuff there John....Acceptance....back to that first step once again. It seems like that is where I always end up. I am powerless and my life is unmanageable because of my lack of acceptance of that fact.

As someone told me years ago, yep....the bad news is sounds like you might have a problem but the good news is that there is hope and help.