sojourner

Am looking for input from others - it's got to be a common thing.

It seems AS's ex-live-in GF is under treatment for what is probably cervical cancer. And at this young age, it's probably caused by an STD, probably HPV. Which means my son has it also. The ex-live-in GF's problem is to the point where hysterectomy is being talked about.

Where is the hope in this? What are the options in this? How does one deal with this on the other side (recovery?).

I know very well it's his problem, but what is the reality of this in recovery and for the long-term?

suki44883

I guess I don't understand exactly what you are asking. Hope for whom? Options for whom? This is an EX girlfriend, right? You son should be tested for any STDs and then go from there.

sojourner

This is a very recent ex-girlfriend who apparently was seeing a physician about this when they were together.

Yes, i could tell my son to get tested. - But he has no money, no car, no nothing. And if someone were to give him the money for a check-up and provide the transportation to get there and buy him whatever prescriptions he needs whenever he needs it, i find it hard to believe he would have the integrity to be celibate - he's in active use here and one-night stands, etc., are a part of it all, sad to say.

I guess what I'm needing to hear about here is the long-term hope of all this, long-term in the sense of recovery.

suki44883

Okay, I see. Well, if your son is out there using right now, this is just another part of that whole addictive lifestyle. Whether or not he's contracted an STD is just one more possibility due to living that way. So far as hope of recovery, I'm sure you know that that's totally his decision and all you can do is hope he chooses wisely. No one can answer those questions for you because it depends entirely on what he chooses to do.

I know it's scary and painful to know that a loved one is making really lousy choices, but since you can't control that, your energies would be better spent taking care of yourself and detaching from the situation of his drug use and all that goes with it.

laurie6781

Did some checking on the net .................. seems until 'physical' symptoms appear in the male (genital warts) they haven't created a test yet to check for HPV in males.

This seems to be the best info I could find:

Sexual Health Network - credentialed experts providing sexuality education from pleasure and orgasm to sexually transmitted diseases, sexual dysfunction, and sex and disability

Hope that helps.

Love and hugs,

Limiya

HPV is very common. Apparently most of the population has HPV but don't even know it because their smear tests come back normal.
CONDOMS do NOT provide protection from HPV as it is contracted through skin on skin contact and not bodily fluids.
This is why most people have it.
Only a small percentage of women will go on to develope cervical cancer out of all these women.
It's passed on through men to women in sexual contact but there is no way to check if men have HPV.
There is the common one where you develop warts, or there is the silent one which created cervical cancer.
You could have sexual contact with one man all your life and still have HPV without ever knowing it.

I feel terrible for your sons girlfriend.
She must be going through a nightmare.
I have had abnormal smear tests before and although treated, that was scary enough.

I hope she makes a full recovery.
~Limiya~

Limiya

Also may i point out that this is not your typical careless sti that is passed on through addict lifestyle.
A very high percentage of the population have this or contract it but their body fights it off naturally.
It's the few people who can't fight it off naturally for whatever reason that develope cervical cancer and abnormalities.

all my best to her recovery.

teke

(((((sojourner))))))