You know addiction looms large in your loved one's life when..
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Eastern Time Zone
Posts: 1,011
You know addiction looms large in your loved one's life when..
It's tax time, the end of January, and time for all the yearly income statements to come in. So here we go. Because my son always puts his childhood home address on anything like a job application, stuff comes here.
So far, two envelopes. One is probably from the gas station that he works at. But another from a store that I had no clue he worked at!! So who knows how many other of these will come - probably places he worked at for 1 or 2 weeks..
Ah, the blessings that addiction brings into people's life....
I'm sick of it.
So far, two envelopes. One is probably from the gas station that he works at. But another from a store that I had no clue he worked at!! So who knows how many other of these will come - probably places he worked at for 1 or 2 weeks..
Ah, the blessings that addiction brings into people's life....
I'm sick of it.
Still Standing
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Here @ SR.
Posts: 3,296
sojourner, I just wanted you to know that I completely know what you're feeling, as I go through this same thing every year with my grown son. I'm sick of it too, but in alot of disappointing and heartbreaking ways that only a parent could know. To me the return to sender idea is completely irrelevent.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
Thank you Nina for your opinion on a post that was not meant towards you.
Sojourner, my post was not meant to be rude or "completely irrelevant" as many people do decide to write return to sender on mail that should be going somewhere else.
It's kind of like when people tell me to "just change your phone number" so my son's father can't contact him. Maybe a little over simplistic, but it is an option. It certainly depends on the level of detachment that you are trying to achieve. And is well within your bounds as a parent of an adult child to not allow your son to use your address as a PO Box anymore.
Sojourner, I hope you find peace and your son finds recovery.
Sojourner, my post was not meant to be rude or "completely irrelevant" as many people do decide to write return to sender on mail that should be going somewhere else.
It's kind of like when people tell me to "just change your phone number" so my son's father can't contact him. Maybe a little over simplistic, but it is an option. It certainly depends on the level of detachment that you are trying to achieve. And is well within your bounds as a parent of an adult child to not allow your son to use your address as a PO Box anymore.
Sojourner, I hope you find peace and your son finds recovery.
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Burnsville, MN
Posts: 966
A working AS??? Mine hasn't had a job in probably 2 years.
I can't help but wonder if he will ever lead any sort of "normal" life.
Copied this from the Prayers for our Addicts thread and have it hanging on my cube wall.
Most Loving God,
We ask your blessing upon all who suffer from addiction.
Strengthen them to reach out for help.
Enable them to take the first step to recovery.
Bless them with the persistence to persevere in the flight to be free.
Give courage and hope to their families, drawing them close together in the power of your love, which alone can transform our living.
Amen
-Vienna Cobb Anderson
I can't help but wonder if he will ever lead any sort of "normal" life.
Copied this from the Prayers for our Addicts thread and have it hanging on my cube wall.
Most Loving God,
We ask your blessing upon all who suffer from addiction.
Strengthen them to reach out for help.
Enable them to take the first step to recovery.
Bless them with the persistence to persevere in the flight to be free.
Give courage and hope to their families, drawing them close together in the power of your love, which alone can transform our living.
Amen
-Vienna Cobb Anderson
Living in a Pinkful Place
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 7,545
don't you wish you could write
"return to sender, address unfound, no such person, no such zone"
to the disease of alcoholism/addiction and then it would never find us, our spouses, partners, friends, children, parents or grandchildren . . .
just dreaming for a brief moment . . .
good thoughts and hugs to those who are able to NOT accept the mail and phone calls.
and the same those who aren't at that point in their recovery
either way - pain is still pain. It still hurts to see our loved one affected by this disease and it is still hard to take care of ourselves.
Sojourner, Do what you can to take care of you - my thoughts & prayers are with you!
HUGS,
Rita
"return to sender, address unfound, no such person, no such zone"
to the disease of alcoholism/addiction and then it would never find us, our spouses, partners, friends, children, parents or grandchildren . . .
just dreaming for a brief moment . . .
good thoughts and hugs to those who are able to NOT accept the mail and phone calls.
and the same those who aren't at that point in their recovery
either way - pain is still pain. It still hurts to see our loved one affected by this disease and it is still hard to take care of ourselves.
Sojourner, Do what you can to take care of you - my thoughts & prayers are with you!
HUGS,
Rita
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: West Palm Beach, Fl
Posts: 142
Some how, my AS creditors got hold of my phone number, my sister's number and my boyfriend's phone number and address. We just can't seem to stop the harrassing calls and mail. I have explained to them, until I am blue in the face, that he doesn't live here and these are not his numbers. They still keep coming.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
helpformyson,
next time they call tell them you are recording the phone call you are going to report them to the Federal Trade Commission because harassing you is completely against the law. You do not need to explain anything to them.
How to stop harassing debt collection calls and letters
A quote from the site regarding your situation as a family member of a debtor:
next time they call tell them you are recording the phone call you are going to report them to the Federal Trade Commission because harassing you is completely against the law. You do not need to explain anything to them.
How to stop harassing debt collection calls and letters
A quote from the site regarding your situation as a family member of a debtor:
IMPORTANT NOTE! Let me emphasize that section 805(b)2. specifically says, "debt collectors may not call third parties under the pretense of gaining information already in his possession." Thus, calling your family, friends, neighbors, employees, employer and so forth, after they already have your phone number, is a serious violation of the FDCPA and should be reported to your State Attorney General immediately.
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