mrsck09

what do you know, Day 3 no contact and AH is trying to text me /email with mushy love stuff. He wants to know if I still want some luving! OMG!!! I spilled my guts out 3 days ago , gave him my ultimadum. He went to his moms igorning me, the kids all other responsibilies and now He wants me! I have so much stuff I want to go off about. He is just doing this cause he needs somewhere to go for now or probaibly wants somethign out of the house. Its so sad and hurts my ego. Here goes my guilty defects kickin in . I prayed and for so far, For the first time in my life I have not responded. I just dont know what to do. I was planning on calling my lawyer on monday to file cuz I cant live like this anymore. how long can i hold out. He needs to beg and prove to me hes more serious about his recovery then staying and mommy enablers house. I will no longer put up with this ****!

coffeedrinker

Just keep repeating, "not enough begging, not enough remorse, not enough proving" because at this point, he's not even close.

Also, think about the self-respect you will lose if you cave! Be Strong Sister!

Yep.

Teggie

Doesn't sound like he's taking things very seriously if he's off quacking about wanting a booty call.

He's trying to get his toes in the door. Slam it shut on him. Hasn't he hurt you enough?
And I say that not just for you but me too. Thats one of the tactics my STBXAH uses.

Hugs,
Teggie

teke

sorry mrsck,

i think he's doing what addicts do.

my guess is, he's finished using for today and now wants to come back to give you more of what you've been trying to get away from. i caved for 21yrs because of the same kind of talk and each time he came home, his addiction and behavior got progressively worse. i've been separated now 2yrs and he's still saying the same things and still using when he feels like it.

try to keep the focus on you, watch his actions and not his words. unless he is seeking help for himself, his addiction and behavior will get worse.

i agree with anvil, whats the rush? HIT DELETE!

mrsck09

your guys are my lifeline!!! great advice!!

mrsck09

he sent one more saying- oh your playing the ignoring game like i do.. LMAO!! he admits hes playing mind games. back to work i go then kids, dinner and sleep. hopefully i get another chance to read on here . it really helps. i am detoxing from my husband and I am not falling for the bs!!!

coffeedrinker

wow, that comment would totally boost my resolve to KEEP ignoring him. man, what nerve

Insulated

My now overdosed deceased ABF kicked me out of his life nearly 20 times and each and everytime begged pleaded stalked committed shopped. ANYTHING in his power to convince me he wanted me and "us". NO WAY. It wasn't me he wanted. It was the false sense of security he'd found in manipulating and gaining power over me. Most of the time, done in a fog due to being high. I took the high road and began in teeny tiny baby steps the art of self preservation. A tiny step that may help you is exercising your option of reading or not reading his written words. I'm with anvilhead. DELETE.