hello-kitty

Not sure if you guys care but I have to share it somewhere.

I received a rather odd phone call early this morning from a 206 area code. I thought it was my boss since I was out sick yesterday. I answered the call and it was my ex's BIL - the guy he's been staying with in Montana. He asked me for D's cell phone number (that's odd - he should have it) because D took his truck last night to run some errands and never brought it back. I instantly thought DRUGS as borrowing cars and not returning them is my ex's m.o. when he is using and the thought crossed my mind that he had found some connections in MT.

But then it dawned on me that this was a local number. I called the number back and it turned out to be a very sketchy Motel 6 out by the airport. I hung up immediately.

So I'm pretty sure my ex is back in town. however, yesterday when my son spoke to him, my ex said nothing about being back in town. When my son asked when he would be home, I swear I overheard my ex tell him 7 days...

And his BIL is with him. Hi BIL used to be heavy into crack 8 years or so ago. He's been clean for a long time. That's why he moved to MT - to get away from the lifestyle. I guess he made a bad choice to come back. I am thinking that this will be a lesson for him - no car, no money, stuck in a crack hotel out by the airport with no way to get back to MT. His wife is going to kill him - I hope. I pray to GOD he doesn't call me to come get him. I won't allow this drama in my home. I turned the ringer off on my phone.

I double checked to make sure my door was locked this morning when I left for work. I know have no control over this. And I'm not about to reach out and make contact. But still I prefer it when my sons father is far away.

Just goes to show you never can tell what is going to happen. I knew he was planning on coming back but I never knew it would be like this. Egad. I hope my ex ends up back in prison. Usually his binges don't end until he gets arrested.

And then there is that crazy voice in the back of my head that is totally in denial saying - "this is all a coincidence. you don't know for sure that he is using."

But it doesn't matter whether he's using or not. I like my peace and serenity. I'm not about to wreck it for myself by getting involved in this situation - coincidence or not.

cmhcali

You are in my prayers!!! I would stare clear of this situation and keep doing the great work you have been on yourself. It is never easy Take a bath and meditate!!!

MsPINKAcres

Take care of you honey - prayers and good thoughts - that whatever ex and BIL are doing they don't "try" to get you involved somehow

Most of all I pray that the serenity, peace and sanity that you have worked so hard to maintain in your and your son's life surrounds your world completely!!!

Prayers for BIL's wife too - I'm sure she is hurting (hope she has a program to help her)

HUGS,
Rita

Callie

It's never-ending isn't it HK. Keep your boundaries up tall and firm. I'm sorry you're dealing with this crap again. Hold tight to your son.

hello-kitty

I've decided that if BIL calls looking for a place to stay, I'm going to tell him that my son has the SWINE flu and that we are quarantined by our doctor for the next 7 days.

See if anyone shows up to harass us then!

Callie

Good Plan HK!

PurpleWilder

It might not be a bad idea to get a hold of someone at the local police department and tell them your concerns. No need to go into gory details, but as a courtesy they may be willing to drive by you house causally once or twice a day just to make sure everything looks OK. Just an idea....

Ann

Stay safe, stay detached and be glad that you don't have to live in his addiction anymore.

That phone call would give me the creeps too.

Hugs

Callie

I agree with dirtmagnet - (love the name BTW! ) Alert the police. They were more than helpful with me when I needed them. As far as driveby's go.

hello-kitty

That's exactly it. That phone call gave me the creeps. I'm fine. No one has attempted anymore contact. They are off in crackland and wont bug me until they are out of money and drugs.

I already live in a neighborhood where the police drive by many times a day. I'm safe, I live in a densely populated area, in a security building several floors up. The only way he could get in is if I left my door unlocked - which won't happen.

Thanks everyone.

teke

hk, just want to let you know i'm still praying for you and yours.

hello-kitty

Hey guys. I still haven't heard anything since that morning. Obviously something fishy was going or BIL would have called me again. Don't you think??

I'm not calling. I'm not planning on calling. I'm not planning on answering the phone if anyone calls me. The original plan that I knew was that D's BIL was supposed to come visit me and Andrew tomorrow. That was BEFORE the crack hotel incident. I am curious whether he is going to call and follow through.

I hope he doesn't call. I hope he just goes away. (But that never happens does it. Blech.)

Andrew and I are going skiing tomorrow. He's 4 :-) I'm so proud of him. My sister and I have been taking the kids (3 cousins - all boys) for lessons every weekend since Christmas. It'll be his third lesson. And then afterwards, my sister and I are going to take turns watching the kids so we can get some skiing in too.

Anyway, that means I won't have cell service. And swine flu is a back up plan...

Andrew hasn't asked for his dad. But he will soon. I really want the relationship between the two of them to end. Does anyone have any ideas on how I can explain it to Andrew? When he asks "can I call my daddy?" What am I suppose to say?!

outtolunch

How about, "dad's ears are broke. He can't hear you."

hello-kitty

Are you joking?

teke

are you saying you want to end the relationship between your son and his dad? if so, i'm curious as to why?

i do understand why you don't want him around while he's active in his addiction but i guess i don't quite understand the harm of him having a phone call every once in a while. i guess i'm just curious.

maybe you could tell him in a childlike way that dad is away trying to figure out how to get his life in order.(even though he may have to find his bottom first)