UNHAPPY777

As you know mt AH finally moved out in November. I am finally getting use to him not being in the home. We have been married for almost 11 years and have know each other for approx. 21 years. He does come to visit the kids once or twice a week. This Sunday when he came by he talked for a while about making mistakes in our marriage and about neglecting his responsibilty. And yes finally I got a sincere apology...or did I? He told me that his plan was to come back home after he received his tax return. He wanted to use the money to buy out of his apartment lease. My response to him was..."what kind of program are you working are you actively in counseling"...He said" I will do whatever it takes"...... YEAH RIGHT...Then he grabs both of my kids hands and says daddy will be moving home soon. LOL After he left my daughter who is 9 said " Yeah right whatever" ......He then promised to pick them up the next day from school. He did follow through with his promise. But, on the way from school he told them again that he was moving back home. I have decided to ask him NOT to tell them that because he hasn't done what he needs to do. If I let him come back home now I would be right back in the same situation. He needs to go to treatment and counseling. He also looks like he has lost an enormous amount of weight! Oh well NOT MY PROBLEM!!!! He also told the kids that he would stop leaving his phone in the car and answer their calls. I responded by saying at this point I'm ready to tell my daughter to stop calling so that I can protect her feelings! He knows that it isn't me calling because she has her own cell phone. I don't know how he thinks he is ready to come back home and he can't even answer his phone when needed!!! I WOULD BE A DA** fool to let him back in .......... 1+1 still=2

hello-kitty

My ex sounds very similar to your ex. He never answers the phone when his son calls and he lies and doesn't keep his promises to my little boy.

I think its really rotten of him to do that and I'm sorry you have to deal with it. I do to. You are not alone. When my ex would come over to see his son, I would tell him not to make any promises about the next time he was going to come over or I would not allow him back in the house.

In my opinion, the broken promises hurt kids the worst. It sounds like your kids know their father is a liar and don't have any expectation that he will follow through. But still I'm sure it must suck to be lied to by your dad, even if you know it's a lie.

Yes. Yes. Yes. Just request that he not discuss when he is returning home with the kids. Maybe he will respect your wishes...

UNHAPPY777

HK ...It is difficult for my 3 yo he doesn't fully understand what is exactly going on. He cries for him at night. all I can do is protect him the best way I know how! Addiction really sucks...

teke

my ah sounds the same as yours when he's out the home at times but my kids are older now and i believe we all have gotten to the point where we would rather visit him at him mom or where ever else he chooses to live, if we had to visit at all. he has disappointed them so much over the yrs and yes i do believe that they were hurt by all the broken promises. i think they may have some trust issues.

another thing, sounds like he has it all planned, have he considered the fact that YOU have a choice in this matter or do he actually think that he's calling the shots. i would think it would take for both of you to make that decision, huh?

is he planning to waiting until tax time to began to get himself together or is he already doing that?

UNHAPPY777

TEKE he is not doing anything now nor do I think he will do anything at tax season. I think it's a bunch of propaganda!!!! He just thinks by saying these things he is keeping the door open. He doesn't realize that he is doing more damage than anything else. He doesn't return calls from the kids or keep promises. He just forgets that he has a wife and kids. He has a lot to account for. Why on earth would I let him come home knowing he is so broken. At this point I am broken toooooooo. I use to have an enormous amount of faith in people and now I realize I have to have faith in GOD and myself!!!! People let you down. At this point I just want to be happy and rekindle the smile that I once knew!!!