Ann

Powerful words there, Cats. Thank you for sharing this painful time of your life

cessy68

OMG. I don't understand how you feel sorry for him? Imagine being thrown in a well sodetermined..... the thought alone causes me to have a panic attack.

I want you to know a couple things. Unfortunately domestic violence dosen't just happen overnight, like addiction, it is progressive. He has eroded your self-esteem to the point that you can't see what is happeing, it's like brainwashing someone.

Somewhere in your mind, you feel 'sorry' for him. You feel like if only YOU did something different, the incident wouldn't have escalated......... I know this for a fact, otherwise you wouldn't feel sad for him, there would be immense anger and fear running through your veins.

And there should be.

If you call a professional in this area, they can, and WILL help you. I KNOW you don't see it that way, (or you would have called already), but you need to call.

They will be able to explain things to you in a way that protects you, provides you support, give you security, and validation. Soon, you will be able to begin to see the depths of the problem here... you will get tools to be better.

One day, (if you call and get professional help) you will look back and you WILL be stronger. You will have boundries in place, you will be safe. You can't see right now, for you are looking through battered eyes.... it's fuzzy....it's blurred and it's foggy.

Please...... reach out for help. Even if you think your o.k. take the time to let a professional talk to you.... you might think very differently afterwards.

God bless,
love,
Cess

StillLearning1

So,
Here is the link to a website:
www.vinelink.com

All you have to do is put in the name of the person. They will notify you by phone or email or both, when the person is released. Usually MUCH faster than the jails or court system.
At least then you will know and be aware.

Lastly, I'm sorry but if you could trust him to respect the laws, follow them. Or be afraid of what could happen if he didn't. He probably would not be doing Meth. For some reason he chose to scare you. Even if he or you think he wouldn't kill you or hurt you. He obviously is very capable of using fear to hurt you.

I'm sorry you experienced that, you are in my prayers.

littlebird77

Oh boy this is a serious thread... Sodetermined:
-If you broke your legs would you heal them by walking? The same goes for your mind. If your peace of mind is broken how are you going to heal it alone with the same mind?

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE come back here, go to meetings.

rayofsunshine

I agree 100%. I lived with a meth head for years. It gets progressively worse
over time. The person you loved/thought you knew is now controlled by the addiction. Very dangerous stuff, meth. This time you got away alive.
Next time you may not be so lucky. Please, please take care of YOU now.
Nothing you can do will cure him. You have to let him fall to have a chance
at getting better, although we know there are no guarantees there. But if you try to see him/bail him out, its guaranteed they'll be a next time of violence.

basIam

This is key here, sodetermined!!!

In reading your posts/responses, I get the impression you are looking for an emotional solution for your predicament. While peace and serenity are at the end of the road, the solution requires action! Only then will you find the emotional comfort you seek.

I have repeatedly asked you, what would you tell a woman in the same predicament to DO?

I understand you might lack the power to carry out those actions, but that's ok... first things first... WHAT WOULD YOU TELL THIS WOMAN TO DO???

Rediscovering

I can truly relate. Thank you for sharing. It is good to know that I am not alone. I have been away from my abusive ex with no contact for over a year and tonight it is all i can do to keep myself from emailing him. It is devastatingly hard...but it gets a little easier as time goes on. Get help. We can't do it alone.

Ann

Here are some hotlines that may help you.

For the US:
National Domestic Violence Hotline:
1-800-799-7233
1-800-787-3224 (TTY For The Deaf)


By state:
United States DV Resources by State
(Click on your state for various hotline phone numbers and other information)

Ann

Michigan Domestic Violence Shelters:


# Michigan Coalition Against Domestic Violence P.O. Box 16009 Lancing MI 48901 (517)484-2924

# Call Some Concerned, Inc. 227 North Winter St., Suite 215 Adrian MI 49221 Business #: 517-263-6739 Hotline/Crisis: 517-263-6737

# Catherine Cobb Safe House and Domestic Violence Program 213 Toledo St. Adrian MI 49221 Business #: 517-264-5733 Hotline/Crisis: 517-265-6776

# Shelter, Inc. P.O. Box 797 Alpena MI 49707 Business #: 517-356-6265 Hotline/Crisis: 517-356-9650

# Domestic Violence Project, Inc. P.O. Box 7052 Ann Arbor MI 48107 Business #: 313-973-0242 Hotline/Crisis: 313-***-5444

# Battle Creek Area Organization Safe Place Against Domestic Violence Box 199 Battle Creek MI 49016 Business #: 616-965-6093 Hotline/Crisis: 616-965-7233

# Bay County Women's Center P.O. Box 1458 Bay City MI 48706 Business #: 517-686-4551 Hotline/Crisis: 517-686-4551 Toll Free #: (800)834-2098

# Safe Shelter, Inc. 275 Pipestone Benton Harbor MI 49022 Business #: 616-925-2280 Hotline/Crisis: 616-983-4275 Toll Free #: (800)310-5454

# Women's Information Service Inc. P.O. Box 1074 Big Rapids MI 49307 Business #: 616-796-6692 Hotline/Crisis: 616-796-6600 Toll Free #: (800)374-WISE

# Cadillac Area O.A.S.I.S. P.O. Box 955 Cadillac MI 49601 Business #: 616-775-7299 Hotline/Crisis: 616-775-7233

# Barbara Kettle Gundlach Shelter Home for A.W. P.O. Box 8 Calumet MI 49913 Business #: 906-337-5632 Hotline/Crisis: 906-337-5623

# Thumb Area Assault Crisis Center 429 Montague Avenue Caro MI 48723 Business #: 517-673-4121 Toll Free #: (800)292-3666

# Branch County Coalition Against Domestic Violence P.O. Box 72 Coldwater MI 49036 Business #: 517-278-7432

# Women's Justice Center/My Sister's Place Box 13500 Detroit MI 48213 Business #: 313-921-3902 Hotline/Crisis: 313-921-3900

# YWCA Interim House P.O. Box 21904 Detroit MI 48221 Business #: 313-961-9220 Hotline/Crisis: 313-861-5300

# Delta County Alliance Against Violence & Abuse, Inc. 1401 North 26th Street Escanaba MI 49829 Business #: 906-789-9207 Hotline/Crisis: 906-786-9387

# YWCA of Greater Flint Domestic Violence/Sexual Assault Service 310 E. Third St. Flint MI 48502 Business #: 810-238-7621 Hotline/Crisis: 810-238-7233

# YWCA Domestic Crisis Center 25 Sheldon Blvd., S.E. Grand Rapids MI 49503 Business #: 616-459-4652 Hotline/Crisis: 616-774-3535

# River House Shelter P.O. Box 661 Grayling MI 49738 Business #: 517-348-3169 Hotline/Crisis: 517-348-8972

# Domestic Harmony P.O. Box 231 Hillsdale MI 49242 Business #: 517-439-1454 Hotline/Crisis: 517-439-1454

# Livingston Area Council Against Spouse Abuse P.O. Box 72 Howell MI 48844 Business #: 517-548-1350 Hotline/Crisis: 313-227-7100

# Eight Cap Inc. Ionia/Monhalm Domestic Violence Pro. P.O. Box 93 Ionia MI 48846 Business #: 616-527-3351 Hotline/Crisis: 616-527-5252

# The Caring House, Inc. 508 Stanton Street Iron Mountain MI 49801 Business #: 906-774-1337 Hotline/Crisis: 906-774-1112

# Domestic Violence Escape(DOVE), Inc. P.O. Box 366 Ironwood MI 49938 Business #: 906-932-4990 Hotline/Crisis: 906-932-0310

# AWARE, Inc. P.O. Box 1526 Jackson MI 49204 Business #: 517-783-2861

# YWCA Domestic Assault Program 353 East Michigan Kalamazoo MI 49007 Business #: 616-385-2869 Hotline/Crisis: 616-385-3587

# Baraga County Shelter Home/Women's Center 11 S. 4th St. L'Anse MI 49946 Business #: 906-524-5017 Hotline/Crisis: 906-524-7078

# Council Against Domestic Assault P.O. Box 14149 Lansing MI 48901 Business #: 517-372-5976 Hotline/Crisis: 517-372-5572

# Domestic Violence Prevention & Treatment Board Michigan Dept. of Social Service 235 S. Grand Avenue, Suite 513 Lansing MI 48909

# Michigan Coalition Against Domestic Violence P.O. Box 16009 Lansing MI 48901 Business #: 517-484-2924

# Van Cas Community Action Program 488 South Paw Paw Street P.O. Box 187 Lawrence MI 49064 Business #: 616-674-3905 Hotline/Crisis: 616-968-3905

# C.O.V.E. Communities Overcoming Violent Encounters 906 E. Ludington Ave. Ludington MI 49431 Business #: 231-843-2541 Hotline/Crisis: 1-800-950-5808

# CHOICES of Manistee County, Inc. P.O. Box 604 Manistee MI 49660 Business #: 616-723-6597 Hotline/Crisis: 616-723-6004

# Women's Center/Harbor House 1310 South Front Street Marquette MI 49855 Business #: 906-225-1346 Hotline/Crisis: 906-226-6611 Toll Free #: (800)455-6611

# Council on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault P.O. Box 2289 Midland MI 48641 Business #: 517-835-6771 Hotline/Crisis: 517-835-6771

# Family Counseling and Shelter Services 502 W. ELm Avenue, Site 6 - East Monroe MI 48161 Business #: 313-241-2380

# The Turning Point, Inc. P.O. Box 1123 Mount Clemens MI 48046 Business #: 810-463-6990 Hotline/Crisis: 810-463-6990

# Women's Aid Service, Inc. P.O. Box 743 Mt. Pleasant MI 48804 Business #: 517-773-0078 Hotline/Crisis: 517-772-9168

# Catholic Social Services 1095 Third Street Muskegon MI 49441 Business #: 616-726-4735

# Child and Family Services 1352 Terrace Street Muskegon MI 49442 Business #: 616-726-3582

# Circuit Court Family Counseling Services 440 S. Quarterline Muskegon MI 49442 Business #: 616-773-1782

# Every Women's Place, Inc. 425 W. Western Avenue, Suite 204 Muskegon MI 49440 Business #: 616-726-4493 Hotline/Crisis: 616-722-3333

# Muskegon County Community Mental Health 125 E. Southern St. Muskegon MI 49442 Business #: 616-726-5266 Hotline/Crisis: 616-722-4357

# Women's Resource Center of Northern MI.,Inc. 423 Porter Petoskey MI 49770 Business #: 616-347-0067 Hotline/Crisis: 616-347-0082 Toll Free #: (800)275-1995

# Haven-Help Against Violent Encounters Now! Box 787 Pontiac MI 48343 Business #: 810-334-1284 Hotline/Crisis: 810-334-1274

# Domestic Violence Shelter P.O. Box 61096 Port Huron MI 48061 Business #: 810-985-4950 Hotline/Crisis: 810-985-5538

# Underground Railroad, Inc. P.O. Box 565 Saginaw MI 48606 Business #: 517-755-0411 Hotline/Crisis: 517-755-0411

# Eastern Upper Peninsula Domestic Violence Pro. P.O. Box 636 Sault Ste. Marie MI 49783 Business #: 906-635-0566 Hotline/Crisis: 906-635-0566 Toll Free #: (800)882-1515

# Relief After Violent Encounter P.O. Box 472 St. Johns Mi 48879 Business #: 517-224-4662 Hotline/Crisis: 517-224-7283

# Safe Shelter 2214 S. State St. St. Joseph MI 49085 Business #: 616-983-6023 Hotline/Crisis: 616-983-4275

# St. Joseph County Domestic Assault Shelter Coalition P.O. Box 402 Three Rivers MI 49093 Business #: 616-279-5122 Toll Free #: (800)828-2030

# Women's Resource Center, Traverse City 720 S. Elmwood Suite 2 Traverse City MI 49684 Business #: 616-941-1210 Hotline/Crisis: 616-941-1210

# First Step 8381 Farmington Road Westland MI 48185 Business #: 313-525-2230 Hotline/Crisis: 313-459-5900