Mixed emotions

Old 11-07-2009, 06:41 PM
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Mixed emotions

The friend sends me a text message, wants me to attend the awards night at the local yacht club, we are up for a few flags, I am a part of the crew and wish to keep racing with these guys next year.

I replied almost reflexively back, no, he responded 'don't let ***** ruin our night'.

I pretty much knew the ex was going to be there, my reason for not attending, still feeling a little raw. But he's right, so I agreed to attend, as soon as I got back to the parking area saw her van parked between a couple of sailboats, and as luck would have it, her table is right next to ours. Oh well.

I arrived as late as I could, just before the start of the awards, actually won a pair of sailing gloves-hahhaha-and got to witness a little of her performance, working the room, a charming sociopath.

Loud voice sexual innuendoes, she was drinking, made a joke about lubricants-if I were a betting man, for my benefit-reinforces why I left, we obviously don't share the same values. Of course I left pretty much as soon as the awards were done.

Feeling down, but like I said, at least a little validated,
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Old 11-08-2009, 04:57 AM
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Ann
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It's a shame that when a relationship is over that some people, like her, still need the drama.

You behaved with grace, showing up to be with your group, and leaving before it got uglier than it already was.

She owns her bad behaviour. Just be glad that her bad behaviour no longer owns you.

Hugs
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Old 11-08-2009, 05:18 AM
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Really. Now, when I see something or hear something from the ex that makes me nuts, I simply remind myself that I made the right decision!
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Old 11-08-2009, 05:31 AM
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i agree with the others, i'm glad you were able to join your friends but i'm sorry that it was sort of uncomfortable for you. congratulations on your win. it takes time and your actions tell me that you will be just fine. you are still in my prayers/
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Old 11-08-2009, 05:39 AM
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agree with all of the above. You demonstrated class, loyalty to your crew, and great self care. Luckily it went as well as it could have. Keep on keepin on.
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Old 11-08-2009, 07:11 PM
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I think a little "rising above it" goes a LONG LONG way. Congrats on your win (new gloves)! It sounds like she's really into drama? Ugh!

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Old 11-08-2009, 07:24 PM
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Originally Posted by ZombieWife View Post
I think a little "rising above it" goes a LONG LONG way. Congrats on your win (new gloves)! It sounds like she's really into drama? Ugh!

Yeah, ironic beyond words, she would do something pretty outrageous things, then when I reacted-my bad, shoulda just walked away-she would accuse me of being 'into drama'.
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Old 11-09-2009, 04:05 PM
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I can't add anything else! I agree with what's been said above. You were good to take the high road. Keep working your own recovery and it will hurt less and less. ((hug))
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Old 11-10-2009, 05:45 AM
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I think a man needs a woman by his side that he is proud to have next to him. This had to be validation that she is not the woman for you.
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Old 11-10-2009, 05:58 AM
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And a confirmation of some of the reasons you are no longer together!!!!

Priceless...
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Old 11-10-2009, 11:54 AM
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Sometimes we need to face our fears to become one with them. Instead of this experience getting you down, realize that you made the right decision for yourself and let it go before it destroyed you. There is power in that alone!

Congrats on your gloves!!

Keep sailing.
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