Update on my daughter
Update on my daughter
I think, last I spoke of this, she convinced herself she was going to fail her EMT exam so she did not take the exam. Her other behaviors suggested she was using something. She had herself a good fit, packed up and stormed out of here, with her " addict luggage" and into the car of some strange guy who looked like a street person.
She subsequently did not show for work and her employer called the Police who then came to my door looking for her. I had a sense where she was staying, took a ride over and she was there. She had another huge hissy about being stalked. I backed away, completely.
Flash forward...She has put on some weight ( a good thing, in her case) is employed by the same employer, has a new BF and lives with him, at his parent's house. ( Better there than here)
We see each other several times a week, now. She even pops for lunch, on her payday which does not include helping herself to my wallet.
For the first time, ever, she is talking about some of the dark days, while she was addicted to heroin. She has been deeply affected by the passing of so many she knew, due to OD. Perhaps one of the biggest changes.....is all about her moods. She is stabilizing. She has good days and some not so good, just like everyone. She is talking about her feelings and qualifies it, if she is just venting or looking for feedback.
This as a bright patch. It's her choice to let this patch grow, or not.
I am enjoying getting to know my adult child.
She subsequently did not show for work and her employer called the Police who then came to my door looking for her. I had a sense where she was staying, took a ride over and she was there. She had another huge hissy about being stalked. I backed away, completely.
Flash forward...She has put on some weight ( a good thing, in her case) is employed by the same employer, has a new BF and lives with him, at his parent's house. ( Better there than here)
We see each other several times a week, now. She even pops for lunch, on her payday which does not include helping herself to my wallet.
For the first time, ever, she is talking about some of the dark days, while she was addicted to heroin. She has been deeply affected by the passing of so many she knew, due to OD. Perhaps one of the biggest changes.....is all about her moods. She is stabilizing. She has good days and some not so good, just like everyone. She is talking about her feelings and qualifies it, if she is just venting or looking for feedback.
This as a bright patch. It's her choice to let this patch grow, or not.
I am enjoying getting to know my adult child.
Oh what a relief that must be for you, I know it is for me, lol.
It appears she is trying to turn her life around and doing a darn good job...all by herself.
It never fails to amaze me that sometimes when we back away they know that it's sink or swim because we're not giving them water wings anymore.
Keeping her in my prayers, Outtolunch, that she stays on this good path.
And good for you for enjoying it all and living in the now, not carrying resentments for the past.
Hugs
It appears she is trying to turn her life around and doing a darn good job...all by herself.
It never fails to amaze me that sometimes when we back away they know that it's sink or swim because we're not giving them water wings anymore.
Keeping her in my prayers, Outtolunch, that she stays on this good path.
And good for you for enjoying it all and living in the now, not carrying resentments for the past.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 367
That's wonderful.
We finally had to just step out of our heroin addicted daughters life too.
Nothing we ever tried to do to help her ever did any good at all....it just set us up for more heartache.
Eventually she smartened up all by herself, dumped all the lowlife men and creeps, and cleaned herself up.
She's now been clean for almost 3 years and living with a wonderful fellow (they're engaged), who is totally anti drugs.
Sometimes (if they're lucky) they do just seem to outgrow it.
Nothing anybody else does seems to work.
You must be very proud.
We finally had to just step out of our heroin addicted daughters life too.
Nothing we ever tried to do to help her ever did any good at all....it just set us up for more heartache.
Eventually she smartened up all by herself, dumped all the lowlife men and creeps, and cleaned herself up.
She's now been clean for almost 3 years and living with a wonderful fellow (they're engaged), who is totally anti drugs.
Sometimes (if they're lucky) they do just seem to outgrow it.
Nothing anybody else does seems to work.
You must be very proud.
Oh what nice news.
I hope and will send up a prayer that she continues on this path. Maybe eventually she will feel up to taking that EMT exam.
It is really great work, very interesting and varied and pays a really good salary. My experience as an EMT made it much easier when I went back to school to get my nursing license (really cut out a lot of courses I would have had to take otherwise).
Either way I wish her the best in her recovery, and am smiling that things are a little better for you.
Love and hugs,
I hope and will send up a prayer that she continues on this path. Maybe eventually she will feel up to taking that EMT exam.
It is really great work, very interesting and varied and pays a really good salary. My experience as an EMT made it much easier when I went back to school to get my nursing license (really cut out a lot of courses I would have had to take otherwise).
Either way I wish her the best in her recovery, and am smiling that things are a little better for you.
Love and hugs,
Your post about your daughter has given me hope for my AAH who DOC is heroin. I've also had to back away from him almost completely, leaving any contact up to him to make.
I was really doubting the wisdom of my decision to back away and leave the contact completely up to him, but after reading your post, I think I am better able to just stay on track. Maybe like Ann said he will realize he has to sink or swim, because I'm not giving him "water wings" anymore. I hope he swims!
I am so glad for you and your daughter! Thank you for the hope you have given the rest of us out here!
I was really doubting the wisdom of my decision to back away and leave the contact completely up to him, but after reading your post, I think I am better able to just stay on track. Maybe like Ann said he will realize he has to sink or swim, because I'm not giving him "water wings" anymore. I hope he swims!
I am so glad for you and your daughter! Thank you for the hope you have given the rest of us out here!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Reality......
Posts: 735
OTL I am so happy to hear progress. But what I am really happy to hear is that you are grateful. I too have been tapping into the power of gratefulness.
Just for today we are grateful that your daughter is on the right track.
Just for today we are grateful that your daughter is on the right track.
Well today, she stopped bye and pulled out two needles and a wad of yarn and did some knit work, on a scarf. She learned how to knit in rehab #3,
(most definitely not at this mama's knee), although I never saw evidence of it.
Just for today, she's pulled it all together. Come what may, I am cherishing this time, together.
(most definitely not at this mama's knee), although I never saw evidence of it.
Just for today, she's pulled it all together. Come what may, I am cherishing this time, together.
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