!@#$%#%!&!!**!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
!@#$%#%!&!!**!
Get this. My son's father befriended me on facebook last night. WTF is wrong with that guy! He hasn't called or seen his son in 4 weeks now. He's just sick I tell ya. I almost sent him a nasty note telling him what a piece of sh!t he is but I just ignored it. My codie self wants me to leave him on as a friend so I can keep tabs on him. ERGH. But that means he can keep tabs on me as well. So I think I just need to block him.
THIS SUCKS SO BAD!
OK. And get this. My neighbors upstairs (renters in my condo building) must have flooded their bathroom again because all the paint is bubbling on my walls and the corner looks like it might be bulging. And the bubble goes all the way down to the tile and stops. Which is very ominous because that means the water is behind the tiles. Which means I may have to gut my bathroom. At the very least the wall will have to be ripped out. And I have NO MONEY AT ALL! No gas. No food. No cat food. No money!
I can't even afford milk for my son right now. Last night I had to take money for milk out of his piggy bank. I'm seriously broke. And now this.
I don't even know who to call! A plumber? The owner of the unit upstairs? A bathroom remodeler????
Any suggestions greatly appreciated. I am stressed. I can't sleep. Today is going to be a really busy day at work and I don't know how I'm going to manage. I've pretty much been crying for 2 days because of everything going on in my life. I know this too will pass but I just can't take it right now. I'm feeling overwhelmed.
THIS SUCKS SO BAD!
OK. And get this. My neighbors upstairs (renters in my condo building) must have flooded their bathroom again because all the paint is bubbling on my walls and the corner looks like it might be bulging. And the bubble goes all the way down to the tile and stops. Which is very ominous because that means the water is behind the tiles. Which means I may have to gut my bathroom. At the very least the wall will have to be ripped out. And I have NO MONEY AT ALL! No gas. No food. No cat food. No money!
I can't even afford milk for my son right now. Last night I had to take money for milk out of his piggy bank. I'm seriously broke. And now this.
I don't even know who to call! A plumber? The owner of the unit upstairs? A bathroom remodeler????
Any suggestions greatly appreciated. I am stressed. I can't sleep. Today is going to be a really busy day at work and I don't know how I'm going to manage. I've pretty much been crying for 2 days because of everything going on in my life. I know this too will pass but I just can't take it right now. I'm feeling overwhelmed.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: West Palm Beach, Fl
Posts: 142
I would think that the upstairs condo owner would be responsible for your damage, if not the condo association.
As far as your son's father, while you are cleaning up your condo, clean out your relationship closet as well. If your son's father does not have a positive impact on you or your son....let it go.
As far as your son's father, while you are cleaning up your condo, clean out your relationship closet as well. If your son's father does not have a positive impact on you or your son....let it go.
Being Me for the first time
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wishek, North Dakota
Posts: 1,160
Assumming your a renter .. this isnt something you need to worry bout , its the owners duty to fix that , and still If you are not a renter it would still be up to the persons above that caused this problem . Contact the renters and get the owners # if possible .
Take a deep breath and relax for a minute say the serenity . things still happen , its just the way life is . were just able to cope and handle it better with a clear head .
I know this isnt something we like to do , But you said you didnt have the $ to get milk . Have you aquired food assistence ? theres no shame in it . and its not for you its for your child . as for the other half .. drop his butt off your acct .. He knows talkin smack about you and your son will stir up the pot , and make you mad .. thats exactly what he wants ....................... and he wins if he takes up precious space in your thinkin , so loose him on there .. I hope you have a better day today
Take a deep breath and relax for a minute say the serenity . things still happen , its just the way life is . were just able to cope and handle it better with a clear head .
I know this isnt something we like to do , But you said you didnt have the $ to get milk . Have you aquired food assistence ? theres no shame in it . and its not for you its for your child . as for the other half .. drop his butt off your acct .. He knows talkin smack about you and your son will stir up the pot , and make you mad .. thats exactly what he wants ....................... and he wins if he takes up precious space in your thinkin , so loose him on there .. I hope you have a better day today
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Posts: 611
Dang Kitty,
Last night you couldn't sleep and now all of this drama early in the morning.
I hope this day gets a whole lot better for you and you get some sleep tonight. I know the feeling when you just wanna scream !@#$%#%!&!!**!.
Take care
Last night you couldn't sleep and now all of this drama early in the morning.
I hope this day gets a whole lot better for you and you get some sleep tonight. I know the feeling when you just wanna scream !@#$%#%!&!!**!.
Take care
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Posts: 611
Oh, here's the advice... the renters upstairs and their landlord are responsible for the damages to your condo. Are u a homeowner? Do you have insurance to cover you? I would contact your homeowner's association to first inform them of the problem which seems to be ongoing. They will then contact the landlord of the upstairs condo. At this point, I wouldn't speak to the neighbors upstairs unless they are good people. You never know these days.
As far as milk for your son. Do you qualify for public assistance?
As far as milk for your son. Do you qualify for public assistance?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: my own little world
Posts: 9,071
I know your frustration kitty, Im being forced witha decision, pay water, or pay power, both gave cut off notices, both earlier than the usual date I pay them (which is why I cant) and Social Services wont help at all.
Sorry, just know your not alone.
Sorry, just know your not alone.
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
(((((Hello-Kitty)))))
OK. First 10 SLOW DEEP BREATHES. Take a deep breathe, hold it in to the count of 10, then slowly exhale. Repeat 9 times. Do this as many times throughout the day as necessary to SLOW DOWN your heart rate. This in turn has the tendency to slow down the racing thoughts.
The owner of the condo above you is liable for any damage caused by his tenant.
Please go to Social Services (welfare) and at least ask for Food Stamps as you are not getting any child support, and yes tell them that. You should also be eligible for WIC (Women, Infants, and Children) until you child is 5 years old. This will get you all the Milk, Orange Juice, etc that you need for your child.
There is nothing wrong in seeking help from county, state, and federal governments. This is the type of situation, welfare was originally set up for. Please do not feel ashamed, many of us have had to use what was available from government to get out of the hole that our A's had put us in.
You can do this sweetie. Remember we are walking with you in spirit.
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing as we do care so very much.
Love and hugs,
OK. First 10 SLOW DEEP BREATHES. Take a deep breathe, hold it in to the count of 10, then slowly exhale. Repeat 9 times. Do this as many times throughout the day as necessary to SLOW DOWN your heart rate. This in turn has the tendency to slow down the racing thoughts.
The owner of the condo above you is liable for any damage caused by his tenant.
Please go to Social Services (welfare) and at least ask for Food Stamps as you are not getting any child support, and yes tell them that. You should also be eligible for WIC (Women, Infants, and Children) until you child is 5 years old. This will get you all the Milk, Orange Juice, etc that you need for your child.
There is nothing wrong in seeking help from county, state, and federal governments. This is the type of situation, welfare was originally set up for. Please do not feel ashamed, many of us have had to use what was available from government to get out of the hole that our A's had put us in.
You can do this sweetie. Remember we are walking with you in spirit.
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing as we do care so very much.
Love and hugs,
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 273
As the person whose bathroom leaked down to the people below me, I can tell you first hand that you are not responsible 
Either the owners or renters of the apartment above you are responsible.
Please make a notation of the damage and take photos!
Call the condo association/board too.
I wouldn't call in any kind of plumber yourself. Make the people upstairs be responsible. That way you are not stuck with the bill.
Good luck!
Also, many neighborhood churches/temples have food pantries. Don't be shy, use them!
Either the owners or renters of the apartment above you are responsible.
Please make a notation of the damage and take photos!
Call the condo association/board too.
I wouldn't call in any kind of plumber yourself. Make the people upstairs be responsible. That way you are not stuck with the bill.
Good luck!
Also, many neighborhood churches/temples have food pantries. Don't be shy, use them!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Hackettstown, NJ
Posts: 692
Wow, I'm impressed with the great suggestions everybody already gave you. Still a humongous pain in the behind to have to deal today with this stuff, but its sounds like there is a lot of stuff you can do. Ssometimes we think everything falls under the umbrella of (no pun intended) 'things we can't change' but we do have power over many things. disease of addiction 'aint one of them, but holding people accountable under the law is one thing we can attempt to make happen. Pray first. Pray second & third. Then do what needs to be done. (ya probably already are).
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
Thanks you guys for all the suggestions and advice. Reading your calm responses helps me to stay calm. I don't qualify for assistance but who knows, maybe Catholic Community Services has money to help with my electric bill or something like that. It doesn't hurt to ask. Especially since I've received a notice on my power as well...
I had to laugh because I called the public health center to see about a flu shot for my child since we don't have any insurance right now and they told me that "due to budget cuts....blah blah blah..." Whatever. Seems so wastefull and pointless that the muckety mucks in Washington are so busy arguing about their GRANDIOUS healthcare programs when they can't even afford to give a toddler a flushot right now. Ahhh well. I digress. No need to get on a political discussion. It just hasn't been a good week.
And the good news is that I have two bathrooms so if one is out of commission for a while, I can use the other one.
Very awesome and very true.
Breath in.... breath out.... breath in.... breath out....
Oh and PS. I blocked his facebook account. I mean GIVE ME A BREAK ALREADY. What a jerk. How ridiculous that he has access to a computer to set up a facebook account and try to befriend me but can't be bothered to pick up the phone and call his baby son. I just don't get it.
High or not. There's no excuse. Actually I'd understand it better if he was using.
I had to laugh because I called the public health center to see about a flu shot for my child since we don't have any insurance right now and they told me that "due to budget cuts....blah blah blah..." Whatever. Seems so wastefull and pointless that the muckety mucks in Washington are so busy arguing about their GRANDIOUS healthcare programs when they can't even afford to give a toddler a flushot right now. Ahhh well. I digress. No need to get on a political discussion. It just hasn't been a good week.
And the good news is that I have two bathrooms so if one is out of commission for a while, I can use the other one.
Sometimes we think everything falls under the umbrella of (no pun intended) 'things we can't change' but we do have power over many things. disease of addiction 'aint one of them, but holding people accountable under the law is one thing we can attempt to make happen.
Breath in.... breath out.... breath in.... breath out....
Oh and PS. I blocked his facebook account. I mean GIVE ME A BREAK ALREADY. What a jerk. How ridiculous that he has access to a computer to set up a facebook account and try to befriend me but can't be bothered to pick up the phone and call his baby son. I just don't get it.
High or not. There's no excuse. Actually I'd understand it better if he was using.
To thine own self be true.
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
Kitty,
In King County, flu shots are available at many doctors' offices and other providers, such as drugstores and pharmacies.
For complete information about seasonal influenza, where to get a flu vaccine, and costs, please visit the Flu Season web pages at Seasonal influenza vaccine recommendations for the 2009-2010 flu season or call Public Health's Information Line at 206-296-4949.
In King County, flu shots are available at many doctors' offices and other providers, such as drugstores and pharmacies.
For complete information about seasonal influenza, where to get a flu vaccine, and costs, please visit the Flu Season web pages at Seasonal influenza vaccine recommendations for the 2009-2010 flu season or call Public Health's Information Line at 206-296-4949.
*~10 YEARS BABY~*
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hollywood
Posts: 9,369
You can try calling 211
Location
They are a pretty good in Cali.
And maybe somewhere in here may help?
Food Banks (Seattle Crisis Resource Directory)
There is more info. here
I Hate My Life
(((.....))))
Location
They are a pretty good in Cali.
And maybe somewhere in here may help?
Food Banks (Seattle Crisis Resource Directory)
There is more info. here
I Hate My Life
(((.....))))
learning to live for me
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: East Coast, US
Posts: 215
Originally Posted by laurie6781 
...
...get out of the hole that our A's had put us in.
...get out of the hole that our A's had put us in.
LOL, I just had to say that.
But to the OP, I agree w/ everyone else. Social Services is here for people like us.
You're a wonderful and smart woman. Stalking (what I call my "checking in") is addictive. Deny his request and it'll drive him more crazy.
And give you more peace.
I grew up with a very similar situation, and I can feel your anxiety.
Just know I'm thinking about you and your family and you'll make it through!!
Love,
Holly:praying
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
Well I denied his friend request (actually I blocked him from ever seeing my page) and now he is texting me and calling me that he wants to see his son. I don't know if this is an addict issue or not. This could just be a self-absorbed A-hole baby-daddy issue.
I hate that he is the father of my son. Really and truly hate it with every ounce of my being.
I'm taking my son to McDonalds for dinner tonight. (I got a $20 rebate check in the mail yesterday and teah I know that money should go to pay my electric bill but whatever.) That way, if he thinks he can wait outside my house til I get home from work so he can see his son on his schedule, he'll be waiting a long long time. And its raining here too. And he does not have a key. Have a nice wait A-hole. See how you like it.
Anyway, it's the same old behaviors as he had when he was using drugs.
Addicts don't change unless they get into recovery. There was a great post about how you know when an addict is in recovery on this website. My ex is most definitely not. He's a sick man with or without the substances.
I hate that he is the father of my son. Really and truly hate it with every ounce of my being.
I'm taking my son to McDonalds for dinner tonight. (I got a $20 rebate check in the mail yesterday and teah I know that money should go to pay my electric bill but whatever.) That way, if he thinks he can wait outside my house til I get home from work so he can see his son on his schedule, he'll be waiting a long long time. And its raining here too. And he does not have a key. Have a nice wait A-hole. See how you like it.
Anyway, it's the same old behaviors as he had when he was using drugs.
Addicts don't change unless they get into recovery. There was a great post about how you know when an addict is in recovery on this website. My ex is most definitely not. He's a sick man with or without the substances.
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,691
great words of advice and wisdom above. Hope that the plumbing issue gets resolved. Amazing how a plumbing DRIPPING FAUCET issue appears at the same time "baby daddy" shows back up...just like a dripping faucet, huh?
He was a sperm donor that just needs to stay gone. I'm sorry that you are having to deal with all of this crap. I guess that it's a good thing that the crap is simply symbolic since you are dealing with bathroom issues.
Glad that you went to McD's....sometimes a break like that is exactly what I need.
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
He was a sperm donor that just needs to stay gone. I'm sorry that you are having to deal with all of this crap. I guess that it's a good thing that the crap is simply symbolic since you are dealing with bathroom issues.
Glad that you went to McD's....sometimes a break like that is exactly what I need.
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
lol. The plumbing issue. There is a hole in my bathroom ceiling. The owner of the unit has told the people upstairs that they need to be out by the end of october and then he will fix my ceiling. We want to wait until they move out so they don't cause more damage. This is the second time they have overflowed the bathtub in 3 months - and my second ceiling replacement in that same ammount of time. C'est la vie.
After I texted my ex last night that Andrew didn't need an unreliable liar for father popping in and out of his life, he never called or came by for a visit. I feel a little guilty for my son because he would have liked to see his daddy and I feel like I prevented that. But there just doesn't seem to be a winning answer to this drama. I am not ignorant enough to believe that this is the end of the drama anyway. But at least it is for this week.
No harm. no foul.
After I texted my ex last night that Andrew didn't need an unreliable liar for father popping in and out of his life, he never called or came by for a visit. I feel a little guilty for my son because he would have liked to see his daddy and I feel like I prevented that. But there just doesn't seem to be a winning answer to this drama. I am not ignorant enough to believe that this is the end of the drama anyway. But at least it is for this week.
No harm. no foul.
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