Let's talk about Spirit
A Brand New Life
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 287
Let's talk about Spirit
There are some of us who are in the wounded baby bird stage, dizzy with grief and loss...some of us in the feisty bluejay stage, healing and getting stronger every day, and there are those who are in the Eagle stage, strong and proud, wise to all that has passed.
What stage are you and what is your best lesson learned or general advice that you would give?
I myself feel so thankful for all of the beautiful birds here, because together we are a strong flock that will soar above this Hurricane and will party on the other side on the beaches singing and laughing someday together.
I sometimes may be a little cheesy with the metaphors but I do feel strongly and passionately about the support here...it truly works miracles.
What stage are you and what is your best lesson learned or general advice that you would give?
I myself feel so thankful for all of the beautiful birds here, because together we are a strong flock that will soar above this Hurricane and will party on the other side on the beaches singing and laughing someday together.
I sometimes may be a little cheesy with the metaphors but I do feel strongly and passionately about the support here...it truly works miracles.
learning to live for me
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: East Coast, US
Posts: 215
Wow I love birds so I love this metaphor! Thanks for starting this thread! 
Nowadays I feel most like a bluejay but late at night I'm a wounded baby blue jay I suppose. I guess I would say to people that hard times are going to come up...just because you leave your addict and feel super confident about it that day doesn't mean you're going to have a smooth ride. I have doubted myself sometimes but whenever I "play the tape all the way through" in my head and actually entertain the thought of "what if I were to call him right now and tell him I want to get back together" it cures me pretty quick if I'm true and realistic about it. But I feel that if we expect these bumps in the road to come up and accept them for what they are, we're more prepared...it won't catch us off guard and make us think that we made a mistake in leaving.
Because I know I didn't make a mistake- deep in my heart.
I treat my addict ex like a drug. I know that everytime I text, everytime I read or reply to his emails, I'm acting on my own free choice but I'm playing with fire and taking another "hit" is only prolonging my pain.
Nowadays I feel most like a bluejay but late at night I'm a wounded baby blue jay I suppose. I guess I would say to people that hard times are going to come up...just because you leave your addict and feel super confident about it that day doesn't mean you're going to have a smooth ride. I have doubted myself sometimes but whenever I "play the tape all the way through" in my head and actually entertain the thought of "what if I were to call him right now and tell him I want to get back together" it cures me pretty quick if I'm true and realistic about it. But I feel that if we expect these bumps in the road to come up and accept them for what they are, we're more prepared...it won't catch us off guard and make us think that we made a mistake in leaving.
Because I know I didn't make a mistake- deep in my heart.
I treat my addict ex like a drug. I know that everytime I text, everytime I read or reply to his emails, I'm acting on my own free choice but I'm playing with fire and taking another "hit" is only prolonging my pain.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
Posts: 4,482
Feisty bluejay! The #1 thing for me was realizing nothing is personal. Everything everyone says or does is a reflection of their own reality.
I have a few personal behavior modifications to continue working on before I can spread my eagle wings. This might take a while
I have a few personal behavior modifications to continue working on before I can spread my eagle wings. This might take a while
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Midlands
Posts: 201
I am in the baby bird stage. Still hurting but learning in the process. Getting through all the "whys" and "ifs".
I am grateful for all my other birds and eagles to help guide me in my flight.
~Limiya~
I am grateful for all my other birds and eagles to help guide me in my flight.
~Limiya~
A Brand New Life
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 287
I am not sure what your faith may be, but I was raised Catholic and the other day I promised that any money I found while cleaning, I would give to St. Anthony if I could find my SS card that I misplaced. Long story short I brought the money today and sat with my priest who heard my confession of grief, loss, guilt and strife. I told him how I am rebuilding my new life every day, stepping forward in every area of my life to do all that I can and that I believed in leaving things that were out of control in God's hands.
It made me feel so much better! I feel relieved, revived and focused knowing my goal and he gave the most helpful advice...anytime someone gets you down or tries to be mean, just reply: "I will be praying for you" It made me laugh to think something like that could be so fulfilling but it is true. In order to find our spirit we must learn to forgive ourselves, forgive others and let God do his work. I feel like grace shined today and a burden has been lifted. I will pray every day that I make good decisions and make the best of my life. God bless
It made me feel so much better! I feel relieved, revived and focused knowing my goal and he gave the most helpful advice...anytime someone gets you down or tries to be mean, just reply: "I will be praying for you" It made me laugh to think something like that could be so fulfilling but it is true. In order to find our spirit we must learn to forgive ourselves, forgive others and let God do his work. I feel like grace shined today and a burden has been lifted. I will pray every day that I make good decisions and make the best of my life. God bless
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,287
Is there a bird that is constantly changing? Because at times I feel like soaring yet other times I still want to hide out in the nest!
As far as lessons learned....if I had to pick one it would be putting the focus back on me. For a long time I lived for him, my AH. He was the center of my universe, and with him came the insanity and chaos.
Maybe it sounds selfish, but when I began to live my life for me again, so many other things started to fall into place. Most importantly, I feel more like "me" again.
Sometimes I feel like I'm leaving him behind but mostly I feel that he needs to find his way just as I am finding mine.
As far as lessons learned....if I had to pick one it would be putting the focus back on me. For a long time I lived for him, my AH. He was the center of my universe, and with him came the insanity and chaos.
Maybe it sounds selfish, but when I began to live my life for me again, so many other things started to fall into place. Most importantly, I feel more like "me" again.
Sometimes I feel like I'm leaving him behind but mostly I feel that he needs to find his way just as I am finding mine.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Upstate, NY
Posts: 718
Wow, this is really cool to think about it this way. I guess most days its the Blue Jay. Strong, squawky and fiesty. But even the Jay can get scared away. The difference though for me and the Blue Jay is we keep coming back. I am learning to stay focused on what is important to me and go after what I want. I am learning not to be pushed off track by others issues... or if I do go off track, I have learned how to come back sooner. And, while we are talking about birds... I would say that I am learning sing a lighter, happier song like the robin or the sparrow, not the low coo of the mourning dove.... ok enough of this already... I am feel like I am going to sprout feathers!!!!!
Smile!! :rotfxko
Smile!! :rotfxko
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