Waiting on 90 days
 

My wife will be 90 days clean in a week what should i expect to see. She has been very active in her recovery and has a sponsor. She has probably made 90 meetings in 90 days and i have heard that really increases the recovery rate. She has been gone a lot can i expect to have her home more? Why is 90 in 90 days so important?

Nothing dramatic that is for sure. Just more of the same. Meetings, talking with and working with her sponsor.

Recovery is a very LONG SLOW process.

As to why the 90 in 90? Well its an asset in helping one in early recovery to start 'physically' changing their old ways. It is an asset in helping one in early recovery become more comfortable in meetings. It helps one to feel SAFE somewhere. It is a way to learn how to LIVE sober.

Your wife has a long way to go and there may be some very 'rocky roads' ahead for a while, especially as she starts to deal with long buried emotions.

I would like to suggest that on her 90 days, you might bring her a rose in her favorite color, and hand it to her with a big smile. Just to show her how aware you are of how well she is doing, especially since she may not think so.

Other than that, step back and continue to watch her ACTIONS. That will tell you how well she is doing.

How are you doing? Have you found a way for you to work on you, to set your own personal boundaries, to not be an enabler?

Please keep posting and let us know how YOU are doing as we do care very much.

Love and hugs,

In reading and looking for some meetings for me. All in all im good just don't ever see my wife which is hard.