New here - Bipolar son needs treatment - what kind??
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Join Date: May 2009
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New here - Bipolar son needs treatment - what kind??
Hi everyone and thanks for taking the time to read my post. I'll try to be brief.
My 18 yr old son was dx with bipolar disorder 2 years ago and is in treatment with a talk therapist and psychiatrist. Although he hasn't seen his psych in a few months. Now he's hitting bottom: failed 2nd semester of community college, wrecked his 08' Civic for the 2nd time, lost his PT job (supposedly "laid off"), and is on probation for painting graffiti. Even though he submits to monthly drug tests as part of his probation he continues to smoke marijuana and occasionally does coke and/or painkillers when he can get the money for them. I don't consider him a heavy drug user at all, but he is headed in that direction fast and is otherwise exhibiting the behaviors of a drug addict: lying, manipulating, denial, depressed, lazy, etc.
His dad and I are divorced but both families are highly involved in his life. He presently lives with me and my husband. He has a younger sister living with my ex.
It's come to the point where neither of us want him in our house because of his continued drug use and lack of responsible behavior.
So....what next?
Inpatient treatment (he probably would agree) or let him hit bottom first....which would mean he's out on the street with no money, no job, no car,etc. He would have to depend on his loser friends for support until they give up on him too. As a mother this is not the option I'd prefer!! But he has not hit bottom in any meaningful way, and there is the risk of self-harm with his bipolar disorder!
If I do send him to treatment -- what kind? Psych or substance??
HELP!!!!!!!!!! ....and thanks SO much!
My 18 yr old son was dx with bipolar disorder 2 years ago and is in treatment with a talk therapist and psychiatrist. Although he hasn't seen his psych in a few months. Now he's hitting bottom: failed 2nd semester of community college, wrecked his 08' Civic for the 2nd time, lost his PT job (supposedly "laid off"), and is on probation for painting graffiti. Even though he submits to monthly drug tests as part of his probation he continues to smoke marijuana and occasionally does coke and/or painkillers when he can get the money for them. I don't consider him a heavy drug user at all, but he is headed in that direction fast and is otherwise exhibiting the behaviors of a drug addict: lying, manipulating, denial, depressed, lazy, etc.
His dad and I are divorced but both families are highly involved in his life. He presently lives with me and my husband. He has a younger sister living with my ex.
It's come to the point where neither of us want him in our house because of his continued drug use and lack of responsible behavior.
So....what next?
Inpatient treatment (he probably would agree) or let him hit bottom first....which would mean he's out on the street with no money, no job, no car,etc. He would have to depend on his loser friends for support until they give up on him too. As a mother this is not the option I'd prefer!! But he has not hit bottom in any meaningful way, and there is the risk of self-harm with his bipolar disorder!
If I do send him to treatment -- what kind? Psych or substance??
HELP!!!!!!!!!! ....and thanks SO much!
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
My daughter ( almost 21) was diagnosed Bipolar, Borderline Personality Disorder and Schizophrenia- Affective disorder, to name a few. She has been on an assortment of prescribed medications. She too got into drugs, cocaine and pain killers and ended up with a heroin habit.
Her last rehab was a dual diagnosis place that put her on prescribed meds that were running about $3000 a month, out of pocket. She had medications for everything and was told she would need medications to function, for life.
She relapsed and I gave her the choice of homelessness or at home detox off everything, including the prescription meds. I half expected her to end up talking to garbage cans, in Mc Donalds. Instead, she was just fine.
My point is that I think it's challenging to accurately diagnose anyone who routinely uses drugs, and especially immature teens and young adults. I also think some teens and young adults wear these diagnosis as an identity, especially given so many have nothing else going on in their lives worth talking about. This is not to say that some are indeed correctly diagnosed....just food for thought.
It sounds like your son is a polysubstance abuser. Pain killers and cocaine are highly addictive and addiction is progressive. Lack of funding is rarely a reason not too use.
Have you considered a well researched wilderness camp experience where he might learn to better cope with life, on its ( not his) terms?
Her last rehab was a dual diagnosis place that put her on prescribed meds that were running about $3000 a month, out of pocket. She had medications for everything and was told she would need medications to function, for life.
She relapsed and I gave her the choice of homelessness or at home detox off everything, including the prescription meds. I half expected her to end up talking to garbage cans, in Mc Donalds. Instead, she was just fine.
My point is that I think it's challenging to accurately diagnose anyone who routinely uses drugs, and especially immature teens and young adults. I also think some teens and young adults wear these diagnosis as an identity, especially given so many have nothing else going on in their lives worth talking about. This is not to say that some are indeed correctly diagnosed....just food for thought.
It sounds like your son is a polysubstance abuser. Pain killers and cocaine are highly addictive and addiction is progressive. Lack of funding is rarely a reason not too use.
Have you considered a well researched wilderness camp experience where he might learn to better cope with life, on its ( not his) terms?
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
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Originally Posted by tjp613 
My 18 yr old son was dx with bipolar disorder 2 years ago and is in treatment with a talk therapist and psychiatrist.
I have a friend who sent his young bi-polar/ODD son to a residential treatment facility in Idaho as a last resort. He's been there about a year and may be coming home very soon
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Marietta, GA
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Just my two cents but at one point while my son was using (and i didnt know) the psyschiatrist thought he was bipolar because his behavior indicated it. But what we found out later that it was just the drugs and not a true chemical imbalance. The docs at that time did tell me that they were very hesitant about diagnosing a teenager as bi-polar because there are so many adolescent behaviors that mimic bipolar - even just basic hormones during puberty can cause this. When you throw drugs onto it going from manic to depressive states is very common. What happened with us is that once he was clean for a few months we found that the so called bi-polar behavior stopped so for us we knew it was drugs and not a mental issue. IF they are put on bi-polar meds and use illegal drugs at the same time it can be very dangerous and make it seem even worse. My recommendation is get him help for the drug addiction first - most places are going to deal with lots of people with other mental issues but dealing with drugs first is going to clear the way to determine what the extent of his other mental issues may or may not be. If he is really bi-polar and uses drugs then he's going to make the swings even more drastic so again the drugs need to be dealt with before you can begin to address any mental disorder - you dont want to mix prescription and illegal drugs.
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: NY
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The docs at that time did tell me that they were very hesitant about diagnosing a teenager as bi-polar because there are so many adolescent behaviors that mimic bipolar - even just basic hormones during puberty can cause this. When you throw drugs onto it going from manic to depressive states is very common. What happened with us is that once he was clean for a few months we found that the so called bi-polar behavior stopped so for us we knew it was drugs and not a mental issue.
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last year my son ended up having a complete psychotic episode he was delusional and paranoid and ended up in the hospital for a week. They stablized him with meds and he continued the meds for almost a year.................the doctors told me its bipolar but they too are hesitant to give the diagnosis yet.
so a few months back they started telling me that when it was a full year on the meds they would take him off them "to see what happens" but A Full year would put him at his 18 birthday and legal adult so I said NO if your going to stop the meds then DO IT NOW so I still have some control or say in his treatment..............so we did
hes been off the meds for a few months now, and his moods have been stable they were never unstable before that episode so I'm not sure what to think...........the doctors tell me that he can cycle but the issue is in what time frame.
It could be days weeks months even years before he has any other episodes
he has risky behavior ~~he smokes pot and that can "trigger" an episode.....but he takes the chance he like most teens and young adults thinks hes untouchable................
Many bipolar people use drugs to self medicate...........and maybe thats whats happening to your son too.
I think the best place to start is with his doctor .................
so a few months back they started telling me that when it was a full year on the meds they would take him off them "to see what happens" but A Full year would put him at his 18 birthday and legal adult so I said NO if your going to stop the meds then DO IT NOW so I still have some control or say in his treatment..............so we did
hes been off the meds for a few months now, and his moods have been stable they were never unstable before that episode so I'm not sure what to think...........the doctors tell me that he can cycle but the issue is in what time frame.
It could be days weeks months even years before he has any other episodes
he has risky behavior ~~he smokes pot and that can "trigger" an episode.....but he takes the chance he like most teens and young adults thinks hes untouchable................
Many bipolar people use drugs to self medicate...........and maybe thats whats happening to your son too.
I think the best place to start is with his doctor .................
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