should I let him know i saw cocaine residue on DR table?
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Jersey
Posts: 229
Ditto to anvil's post...
I thought our daughter didn't know anything either.... It still pains me four years later what my then 8 y/o knew, and I didn't want to believe...........
PLEASE take care of you and the kids.
I thought our daughter didn't know anything either.... It still pains me four years later what my then 8 y/o knew, and I didn't want to believe...........
PLEASE take care of you and the kids.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: in my own world~
Posts: 1,237
Everyones really being honest here hon. Your not only being co-dependant but your hitting on selfishness. You want your children to be with you during this but your not really understanding the reprecussions of the future. When they are really old enough they will wonder why "Mom" let them live in a house with an addict....Or, it could go the other way. This type of lifestyle just may be something they pick up. Please put some serious thought into all this and let someone on here help you to leave .....Smiles, Bonnie
Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Wishin' I was on the Beach!
Posts: 1,415
Hi DW.... good to see you again.... sorry for what you're going through.
A good friend here, Babs, shared this with me. It helped me when I needed it....
hope it helps you. Moving forward is tough, but YOU can do it! Believe in yourself!
You are worthy and deserve a life filled with joy, peace and happiness!
How did I make myself move forward? I kept telling myself over and over and over that the difference between an intention and a decision is ACTION! There were times I was so scared I couldn't sleep....
I kept asking myself over and over and over, when does the pain stop? When I make it stop! (I used to read that piece in the power posts every single day, and there were still days that I would feel so sorry for him that I would almost cave in!)
A good friend here, Babs, shared this with me. It helped me when I needed it....
hope it helps you. Moving forward is tough, but YOU can do it! Believe in yourself!
You are worthy and deserve a life filled with joy, peace and happiness!
How did I make myself move forward? I kept telling myself over and over and over that the difference between an intention and a decision is ACTION! There were times I was so scared I couldn't sleep....
I kept asking myself over and over and over, when does the pain stop? When I make it stop! (I used to read that piece in the power posts every single day, and there were still days that I would feel so sorry for him that I would almost cave in!)
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: my own little world
Posts: 9,071
Drained, welcome back.
I remember when you made him leave before what he put you through. I know it well. My boss is on bar committee and I know those like your husband and what they will do to keep it hidden, well too.
I can only say Im sorry. I wish you better.
Your children are a bit older than mine, and "shocker" you'd be surprised what they actually know and wont tell you.
My only advice is keep working, keep substituting, dry close to your children, focus on you and them, meanwhile start slowly stashing a little money away. There will come a day, when appropriate and safe for you and the kids to disappear,a nd you'll need those funds.
Hang out, and remember take what you need and leave the rest, we all have our own pace and our own due time.
Should you let him know, you saw residue on table? will it really do any good? or will it start another aggressive altercation?
I remember when you made him leave before what he put you through. I know it well. My boss is on bar committee and I know those like your husband and what they will do to keep it hidden, well too.
I can only say Im sorry. I wish you better.
Your children are a bit older than mine, and "shocker" you'd be surprised what they actually know and wont tell you.
My only advice is keep working, keep substituting, dry close to your children, focus on you and them, meanwhile start slowly stashing a little money away. There will come a day, when appropriate and safe for you and the kids to disappear,a nd you'll need those funds.
Hang out, and remember take what you need and leave the rest, we all have our own pace and our own due time.
Should you let him know, you saw residue on table? will it really do any good? or will it start another aggressive altercation?
the girl can't help it
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
(((((DW))))))
Yesterday I wrote a really long reply to you concerning your kids that somehow got erased as I was getting ready to post it. I wrote about denial and how not facing reality is very damaging to kids.
What are you missing out on? I think you are in serious denial if you think your kids don't know something is up. They may have already seen him using and just not told you because you don't verify what is real with them. The youngest baby is aware in changes in their family. School aged kids know about drugs because they are in the schools. Please don't let yourself believe your kids are not aware of what is going on.
I just don't know how people can think that their kids are so unaware....
Yesterday I wrote a really long reply to you concerning your kids that somehow got erased as I was getting ready to post it. I wrote about denial and how not facing reality is very damaging to kids.
What are you missing out on? I think you are in serious denial if you think your kids don't know something is up. They may have already seen him using and just not told you because you don't verify what is real with them. The youngest baby is aware in changes in their family. School aged kids know about drugs because they are in the schools. Please don't let yourself believe your kids are not aware of what is going on.
I just don't know how people can think that their kids are so unaware....
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