suchAsucker

Well, today is the day... My a fiance moved out this afternoon. We woke up today like any other day, and I finally said that I needed to know his "plan" for when I move in 17 days... We talked, and he said that he had previously talked to a friend who would let him move in with him. I said that that was good. He said that he'd like to move today and I agreed. In a few hours, he packed his stuff, washed his clothing, and his friend arrived with a truck to move him. We had a wonderful, heartfelt conversation about the good times we've had over the past 2.8 years -- we didn't feel the need to discuss the bad stuff because that has been discussed ad nauseum over the years. In a way, I think that we were BOTH relieved that we had come to a decision with action behind it. When we were at the door, looking at each other, he just said, "Well this is the start of a new journey," and I said, "I'll see you at the other end". And that was it, he walked down the stairs and drove away with his friend.

It was all so civilized that I'm kinda in shock. I think we were both ready for this to be over. I admit, I was expecting more drama... but then again, it ended with a Whisper not a Bang. I really don't know how I ~feel~ yet, still kinda numb about it. But the one sensation that I know I do feel is SAFE.

That's all I have to say right now, but I'll write more in the upcoming days once I feel the gravity under my feet..

suchAsucker

Dear C: Thanks for that beautiful note... I really needed it... With Love, S.S.

Serenity Bound

Safe is a good start. A really good start.

Hugs,
Chris

gotahavfaith

I'm sending you lots of hugs today!!!

:ghug

Gotahavfaith

suchAsucker

Thank you so much for your support... I feel like I'm surfacing to the top of the ocean after traveling inside the Belly of the Whale for too long... With Gratitude, S.S.

Hammerhead

WOW! There is a sense of peace with civility... most co-dependents have hardened our souls as a direct result of "the chaos" or drama... so when things ARE civilized... it IS a shock!

In Kelsey Grammer's Biography he makes reference to the "gentle wind" in our lives... that often we are so accustomed to whirlwinds that it is soothing to have a "gentle wind". I hope and pray that your HP provides you with the "gentle wind" you need at this time.... you WILL find your feet and you WILL find your way. God Bless and my prayers and thoughts are with you.

Angelic17

Hang on sweetie, GOD has something so much better planned for you. Take this time to pamper yourself. Better days are ahead. I am proud of you. You have alot of strength. :ghug3

suchAsucker

I think that there has been such a whirlwind of chaos for so many years that I didn't have energy left for the drama.. (Drama, in earlier years, I would have loved/hated/loved). Although, I admit it... the codie inside of me almost wanted a drama to feel that there was a "Whiz-Bang End"... but I had no energy for it and neither did he... it was really weird, in a good way, to end it without any drama.. I think that both of us were expecting the other to elicit the dramatic expectations in the other.. but it never happened... and I'm grateful that there was a maturity to the finale.

Tonite, my first nite alone in God knows how long (?), I'm going to take a bath... a drama free bath.. where I don't haveta hide my purse or take it into the bathtub with me, and worry about whether he has sneaked-out to get drugs while I'm giving myself a pedicure.. the silver linings to these clouds are begining to surface quickly... I know I'll have good and bad moments, but I'm really appreaciating the simple things we take for-granted in these next days...

jwsablich

Such....

I am about to go through that in the next 48 hrs, my fiancee and I have had some wonderful times together, never fighting, its was a fantastic relationship right up to when her addition caused her to get arrested and since then its been down hill through her recovery.

after some extensive talks we are gong to part ways and continue on our separate ways. like you said its going very civilized and it will hopefully end in a wisper.

I am at odds as to how I feel about it, in one hand I still love her very much, on the other I cannot keep going the way we are.
I almost want it to end in a bang to have a reason to dislike her but I still love her and want the best for her even if its not with me.

Angelic17

Hey Such, you need to change your screename now. To such a strong woman. You inspire me, and you lead a great example for the young women in abusive and destructive relationships. A name change would be appropriate for you